Londoners life – Overheard by Phil Ryan

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This week’s offering from my new delve into the London psyche. I’m collecting bits of chats and conversations I overhear as I drift around this great city of ours. And I’m finding utterly compelling bits of stuff that leaves me marvelling at what goes in in some people’s heads. I was sitting in a café off Bond Street with a friend waiting for the rain to stop so we could go to a meeting. My friend had to deal with an email so I fiddled with my phone skimming through some photos I’d taken. The place was virtually empty and outside the rain misted up the windows. I glanced up when I caught the fragment of conversation from two young looking guys one carrying what looked like a Cello case who were sitting about two tables away. I guessed they were from the nearby music school. I slid sideways in my seat the better to hear them. One of them was holding up Metro newspaper. The taller guy started shaking his head.
He snorted “Cuh. Look at this. They’ve got an Orang-utan who can pick out three tunes on a little electric keyboard. It’s some experiment by this group of scientists in Japan” his friend smiled “Well they reckon they’re the closest primate to us in terms of intelligence don’t they?” he furrowed his forehead “Or is that chimpanzees?”
The taller guy paused briefly “Um I’m not sure it might be” his friend waved a hand “But it’s clever though isn’t it. Imagine some creature like that actually being able to grasp the concept of music. To use those big old hands so delicately” the tall guy nodded in agreement “Yeah I suppose. It says here the large primate known as Zango has been practicing for three years and can now clearly play three well known nursery rhymes apparently from memory” his friend smiled “Wow that’s so cool. Amazing huh?”
The taller guy let out a long sigh “Nah. It’s not that clever really. I mean it’s not as if he’s writing his own stuff. It’s all covers isn’t it” his friend let out a laugh “What some bloody great monkey knocks out twinkle twinkle little star and you want him to whack out a hit? It’s a monkey not Adele?” The taller guy seemed to ignore the joke “But come on its just a trick it’s not understanding what it’s doing it’s like a performing ape in a circus. So it’s not really playing is it? It’s a repeated task. If it created a tune then that would be something. Yeah then it would be a real story about music” He sipped his tea thoughtfully. His friend chuckled “You don’t want much do you” he paused and delicately nibbled his muffin “I bet you Simon Cowell would manage him if he could”
Then my phone rang.
London is such a great place for this sort of thing. And now I’ve warmed to my new challenge it’s surprising what I’m picking up. I’ve stopped short of trying to record people on my digital recorder. I just make some notes. Often on my paper or a napkin. But some of the lines are just priceless. I’ll leave you with one I caught in a queue at the cinema. “Oh yeah they put stuff into the popcorn when they’re showing violent films. Calms the punters down”
I wonder.