Stefans TV Picks; 21st June

Monday 21st – Five, 23:00
What happens when a crew of anonymous criminals is put together to pull off a perfectly planned bank heist, only for it to go horribly wrong with pretty gruesome results? Only Tarantino knows. The films that Quentin has released into the world have often been viewed as masterpieces but his 1992 breakthrough movie still stands out as one of the best. I am of course talking about Reservoir Dogs. With brilliant writing and outstanding camera work (tracking shots that rival Goodfellas’ restaurant entrance for all you movie buffs out there) Dogs is an absolute must!

Tuesday 22nd – E4, 22:30
Any fans of Family Guy will know that the last few seasons of a once great cartoon started to run dry. The creator/writer, Seth McFarlane, needed to come up with a new concept to save the franchise and so he gave us The Cleveland Show. A spin off from Family Guy, The Cleveland Show follows the adventures of long suffering character Cleveland Brown as he moves back to his hometown of Stoolbend, Virginia with his 14 year old son (who is constantly hopping between genius and idiot) and meets up with old friends and his highschool sweetheart. As part of E4’s Toonsday, they are showing the entire first season again, so make sure you catch the first episode and get reminded of what good cartoons are like and don’t worry about the danger of spin-offs, this is much more Frasier than Joey.

Wednesday 23rd – BBC 1, 14:15
I know, I know, not everyone is digging the football, but this is an important game. After Robert Greens terrible butter covered hands and last weeks game that made me realise that even someone like me could be a professional footballer, today’s Match of the Day Live will show the game that will decide whether England are in the rest of the tournament or not. As we face Slovenia I shall be wearing the three lions on my shirt, singing along to The Great Escape theme and asking all, even if they don’t like the game, to cross their fingers for our boys to win. EN-GER-LUUUUND EN-GUR-LUUUUND EN-GUR-LUUUUUND

Thursday 24th – BBC 4, 21:00
Ever since I’ve been a teenager I’ve loved the band The Eels. The creative force behind the band is that of lead singer Mark Oliver Everett known simply as E. Always one to shy away from the spotlight until he is on stage, in Parallel Worlds, Parallel Lives: Mark Everett we see a rare glimpse into the life and history of E as he travels America finding out more about his father, a genius who developed the theory of parallel universes, yet was unable to build a relationship with his son who saw him as a stranger with whom he lived. For fans of the band, Parallel Worlds will help identify the meaning behind E’s deeply personal lyrics, for those not familiar or who don’t like The Eels, this show will be like a brilliant version of Who Do you Think You Are!

Friday 25th – BBC 2, 21:00/Channel 4, 22:00
What’s all this then? Two selections? That is right my friends, a nice double bill for you tonight. Starting on BBC 2 in Are You Having A Laugh? David Walliams presents a documentary all about the use of disability in TV. With input from actors and comics including Stephan Merchant, Dom Joly and Ben Miller, we’ll see the attitude towards how disability has been portrayed over the years and how it has changed to become, sometimes questionably, used in comedy today. Straight after over on Channel 4 we have the glorious return of The I.T Crowd. The BAFTA award winning sitcom is back for season 4. Once again we shall get to join the (primarily basement situated) adventures of Moss, Roy and Jen. This week Jen decides she wants more from her job and applies as Entertainment Manager and asks the boys from I.T to help her find ways to amuse her boss’ business connections.

Saturday 26th – BBC 1, 18:05
His enemies have formed an alliance against him, his assistant has been shot, his Tardis has been destroyed, the stars are all going supernova and the Doctor is trapped in the Pandorica. The finale of Doctor Who promises to be action packed and full of answers to so many questions and my inner geek is waiting with huge anticipation for the last episode. Although after this I’m really not sure how I’m going to fill the hour between 6 an 7 on the following Saturday evenings!

Sunday 27th – E4, 23:00
This week opened with one of my favourite filmmakers and I felt it would be nice to close it with another, that filmmaker is Kevin Smith. Dogma (the fourth in Smith New Jersey Chronicles) tells the story of two angels, Bartleby and Loki (Ben Affleck and Matt Damon) who are trying to find a way back into Heaven after being banished for reasons including getting drunk and flipping God the bird, while Bethaney Sloane (Linda Fiorentino), after being given a Holy Quest by the angel Metatron, tries to stop them. It is as much a study in, and questioning of dogmatic faith as it is an outlet for Smiths love of dick and fart jokes. This was the first of his films I saw and instantly got me hooked on Smiths writing style and his returning characters Jay and Silent Bob. Cleverly written and thought provoking when your not laughing, Dogma shows the side of religion you never see in church.

Stefans TV Picks.

Monday 14th – Channel 4, 23:15
Once again we dive into the world of Televisual Wonderment, and the week is starting on a high with the brilliant Mr Eddie Izzard. His show Dressed to Kill is a fantastic piece of stand up and even though it’s 12 years since it was recorded in San Francisco, its still holds up against (and in my opinion is still better than) most of the comedy shows today. So sit back and marvel in the seemingly unplanned unrehearsed ramblings about history, space, movies, Italians saying Ciao and his famous Cake or Death routine.

Tuesday 15th – Sky Movies Premier, 23:40
Korea’s movie industry isn’t that well known over here, even with this sad fact, they’re still responsible for some of my favourite films, from the famous like OldBoy to the lesser known, but often recommended by me, I’m A Cyborg, But that’s OK. Their new big movie to hit our shores is The Good, The Bad, The Weird, a funny, action packed Western that spends the majority of its time either in elaborate mass gunfights or marathon length horse chases. The Good, The Bad, The Weird thankfully retains the casts original voices and hasn’t been confined to the dire pile of dubbed movies, however having said this, the subtitles aren’t great and for the likes of me (who sometimes forgets to put his glasses on) it was occasionally hard to read as the words bled into the pale desert landscapes. But even with this it’s still a brilliant movie that you should stay up late for.

Wednesday 16th – Discovery, 18:00
As those who’ve read my articles know, I love movies, even with all their unbelievable acts. I occasionally find myself, while watching an explosion filled, bullet dodging actioner if it is really possible to jump of a high cliff into freezing water and survive, or drive a car through a fire without melting the tyres, and when these questions arise…enter the Mythbusters. Mythbusters is all about two wannabe mad scientists, Adam Savage and Jamie Hyneman, proving or disproving scientific myth and rumour. In this weeks double bill the guys turn their attention to the gory myth of body splitting via a snapped High Tension Cable and in the second episode they study the film Wanted in an attempt to re-create the bullet curving technique. With additional experiments and theorem smashing by the henchmen of the team Grant Imahara (electronics/robotics), Tory Bellici (builder) and Kari Byron (nerd pin up girl) Mythbusters is as humorous as it is fact filled. Loadsa fun to watch.

Thursday 17th – BBC 4, 21:00
Comedy can be a great way to change people’s outlook or highlight political issues in a way that appeals to the masses. Starting in the 60’s an nearly taking over in the 80’s political satire has always been a major comedy genre and in Frost on Satire we see it’s beginnings with programmes like ‘That Was the Week that Was’, interviews with comedians from both the UK and the US about the power of satire and clips showing the greatest satirical TV moments from the last 50 years. Expect some outstanding comedy most likely including the likes of the Cleese, Barker and Corbett sketch ‘Class’ and Ben Elton when he was great!

Friday 18th – ITV1, 18:30
Sorry to all those who are sick of all the red crosses all over the place, who only visit a select few pubs and already hate and despise vuvuzelas with a vengeance but once again England are taking to a South African pitch, this time to play Algeria in the World Cup Live, and so say the annoying football shirt clad loud braying majority (of which I am one) C’MON ENGLAAAANNNND!

Saturday 19th – ITV2, 12:00
After growing up in the 80’s I have many fond memories, some of the most prominent are ones of me and my friends riding our bikes, all pretending to have a little brown wrinkly alien joining us on our adventures. Yes of course, I’m talking about E.T The Extra Terrestrial. If your old enough to remember watching it, then reminisce back to more innocent times while watching a bunch of kids outwit highly trained agents on their BMX’s and if your too young or haven’t seen it….I feel sorry for you, make sure you catch this masterpiece of cinematic storytelling, I just really really hope it isn’t the re-mastered version and those agents are still carrying guns!

Sunday 20th – BBC4, 21:00
I am saddened, the weather is promising a glorious summer, and I am attending no festivals. Glastonbury, Download, Isle of Wight, Reading….all denied to me this year, so I’ll have to be contented with highlights on the telly-box. Celebrating the 40th anniversary of Glastonbury this year, Glastonbury at 40 will be sharing the history of the UK’s most famous festival. Narrated by Mark Radcliff, we will be treated to archive footage ranging from muddy hippies to the clean trainer’d Jay-Z and music from a plethora of bands who have played there over the years.

Stefans TV Picks; 6th June

Monday 7th ITV3 – 22:00
Psychological thrillers…so much scarier than horror, which is why The Shining is still the scariest movie ever made, and why I shall be watching the first instalment of The Sculptress. First shown in 1996 this made for TV movie stars Pauline Quirke in a break from her time in the long running Birds Of a Feather to play an altogether different kind of character. The Sculptress, based on the Minette Walters novel, is set three years after a gruesome murder of the mother and sister of, now lifer, Olive Martin who was found blood soaked at the scene of the crime. The story of the murder, the trial and the imprisonment of Olive is the subject of a new book by journalist Rosalind Leigh who, after finding out more about her subject and interviewing all involved, starts to believe in Olive’s innocence. A brilliant turn for Quirke and a series that’ll keep you guessing as you follow the investigation, anyone with a penchant for mystery should see this.

Tuesday 8th ITV1 – 22:35
American dramas can often come across as cheesy an fake, full of beautiful young adults looking ponderously out over lakes while an acoustic indie hit plays over the scene (Dawson…I’m looking at you), but every so often they send out something amazing like John Adams or Carnivàle (which EVERYONE should watch). This is what I’m hoping for in the new to air in the UK, October Road. For 10 years, writer Nick Garret has been away from his home town becoming a famous author and screenwriter. After returning home he must handle the reaction of the people he based his best selling book on, try to re-kindle old friendships and after living a pretty full life in his absence, see if he is really able to return to his old quiet lifestyle. With the second episode running straight after tonight’s pilot, lets hope it can hook us right away. The only problem I can see with this is that it clashes with the second half of The Sculptress (ITV3 – 22:00) so it’ll have to be Sky+ one and watch the other.

Wednesday 9th Channel 4 – 21:00
I have an addictive personality, if there’s something I like I will watch, listen to or play it for ages (currently it’s Assassins Creed II and the music of Broadway show Wicked) after today though, I’m pretty sure it’ll be all about Big Brother. I’ve not watched every series, but the ones I have, I’ve been glued too! So tonight I shall be joining Davina and the braying, cheering, condemning and booing crowds as we are introduced to the housemates of the last ever Big Brother. It looks like we’re in for a glorious summer, but between my Xbox, script writing and Big bloody Brother, I aint gonna see any of it.

Thursday 10th FIVE – 21:00
Robert Rodrigeuz is cool, his house is cool, his music is cool, his hat is cool and his movies are supercool. Once Upon a Time in Mexico is the third installment in his (possible homage to Sergios Leone’s Dollars trilogy) ‘Mariachi Trilogy’. Staring Antonio Banderas once again as the nameless mariachi, who is spoken of in Mexican folklore as merely ‘El’ and Johnny Depp as CIA Agent Sands. Based around a loose plot of a military coup against the Mexican President, Once Upon a Time in Mexico is more about the action and the brilliant gun fights that made El Mariachi and Desperado (the first and second in the trilogy) so much fun to watch.

Friday 11th Channel 4 – 19:30
Unreported World has had some horrific episodes showing atrocities from around the globe including slavery, sex trafficking and the plight of people in poor countries. Tonight’s episode travels to El Salvador to tell of the children used as hitmen for the multitude of gangs and who accept the high child mortality rate as part of life as much as they believe in the subjugation and sexual objectivity of teenage girls in the gangs. Never an easy program to watch, but always informative and humbling. Although I find it odd that Channel 4 chose to put this show in a lineup before Glee, Big Brother and 8 Out of 10 Cats, after Unreported World, I’m not sure I’ll be in the right mood for singing and dancing kids, an unpredictable human experiment and Jimmy Carr!

Saturday 12th ITV1 – 18:15
THREE LIONS ON A SHIRT, JULES RIMET STILL GLEEAAMING
I don’t usually like football, but when England play I cant help but get involved, our first game of the season against the USA will be shown live in the World Cup Live, so get some burgers on the bbq and join the nationwide party. This is the only time I get into football so I’m allowed to be excited by it.

Sunday 13th Sky Movies Sci Fi/Horror – 19:20
To coincide with Frost Magazine’s new Retro film reviews I thought a lovely piece of retro cinema would be a brilliant way to end the week, so I bring you The Lost Boys. This 1987 vampire classic revolves around the lives of two brothers, Michael (Jason Patric) and Sam (Corey Haim) as they move to a new town supposedly over-run by vampires. As Sam befriends the self titled Vampire Hunter Edgar (Corey Feldman) the story thickens and after Michael starts showing the sign of vampirism, and with help from Ed, Sam goes on a hunt to seek out the head of a vampiric punk gang, played by a big haired Keifer Sutherland, in an attempt to save his brother. Full of brilliant 80’s humour and an awesome soundtrack, The Lost Boys is a must for any fan of the Retro.

Stefans TV Picks; 31st May

Monday 31st – BBC 2, 21:00
I’m not a big fan of period dramas, I would rather read Pride and Prejudice, Cranford annoyed me and I keep expecting Mark Heap to do a pratfall or start juggling in Lark Rise to Candleford. However, I’m expecting more than just stuffy women in bonnets and bile rising oh so polite kids in todays ‘The Secret Diaries of Miss Anne Lister’. Anne Lister lived from 1791 to 1840, was a Yorkshire Landowner, rural gentlewoman and diarist, she also courted huge amounts of controversy due to being a lesbian and living with her lover. Based on Lister’s coded diary, this is one costume drama that promises to be more compelling than most others.

Tuesday 1st – ITV 1, 22:35
I tried, I really tried, I wanted to find a TV show better than my selection, but I really couldn’t, so…Shaun of The Dead it is. This brilliant zom-rom-com by the guys who bought us Spaced and Hot Fuzz shows what most of us would probably do in the event of a zombie apocalypse. Immensely funny and full of brilliant references and homage’s to the zombie genre (Shaun works at Foree Electronics, Ken Foree starred in Dawn of the Dead and I think his mother was purposely named Barbara just so they could utter line ‘We’re coming to get you Barbara’ a play on the line ‘They’re coming to get you Barbara’ from Night of the Living Dead) if I had a pick of the week, this would be it.

Wednesday 2nd – BBC 2, 21:00
Myths and Legends intrigue me, not the magical and mystical aspect of them, but how and why they started. One of the most well known myths is that of Atlantis. Tonight we shall join historian Bettany Hughes in Atlantis: A Timewatch Special, as she uses geology, archaeology and historic events to examine the natural disaster that inspired the legend of this island.

Thursday 3rd – Sky Movies Premier, 17:00
Stop motion animation films have come a long way sing King Kong terrorised New York back in 1933 and through Peter and The Wolf, Wallace and Gromit and Jack Skellington we come to Coraline. Based on the book by Neil Gaimen, Coraline is the story of a young girl bored with her life who, after finding a hidden door in her new house, makes nightly excursions into a fantastical parallel world that mimics her own life but changes things so all is perfect for her. A brilliant slightly nightmarish movie that everyone can watch and everyone will enjoy.

Friday 4th – Sky Movies Premier, 20:00
Johnny Depp is known for his wacky outlandish roles, in Public Enemies we get to see him be sensible for a change. Starring Depp as notorious gangster John Dillinger and Christian Bale as hard-nosed FBI agent Melvin Purvis charged with tracking him down and capturing him, Public Enemies brings all the action you’d expect from a gangster movie, but also shows the relationships between Dillinger and his crew, his moll and most importantly the game (in his eyes) between him and Purvis. A nice change for anyone like me who is sick of Depp prancing about in make up.

Saturday 5th – BBC 2, 22:00
The series I’m in a Rock and Roll Band has been a good look at all the elements of a rock band (I’ll jus ignore that they lumped us bassist’s in with saxophonists and backing dancers as ‘the other one’ in a band *grumblegrumble*!) and will be ending with a studio discussion presented by old punk Jonathon Ross, rock fan Lauren Laverne, Police drummer Stewart Copeland and DJ Mark Radcliff discuss theirs and the nations favourite rock’n’rollers and debate all things rock live in front of a studio audience. After a nation wide poll they also be revealing the countries dream band! I’m hopin for Thom Yorke on vocals, Slash on guitar (just for his sweeeet solos), Travis Barker on drums, Flea on bass, the Gogol Bordello girls for backing vocals/hi-jinks and Billy Corgan as song writer!

Sunday 6th – BBC1, 20:00
I like telly. And I like to see things I like get awards for being good, which is why the British Academy Television Awards (BAFTA without the F) will be on in my house today. Honouring all thing’s telly and giving out those shiny one eyed faces the only bad thing is it’s being presented by the BBC’s flavour of the month Graham Norton, he should stick to annoying reality gameshows and shouting innuendo’s on his chatshow! Other than that sit back and watch the pretty people get pretty awards.

Stefans Top Ten Books

After our Editors put out a call for peoples top ten books, I felt inclined to answer. After picking up reading faster than then my infanthood classmates and having a (some would say) overactive imagination, I’ve always loved *cliché* escaping into books. From biographies of drug traffickers to Bible Psalms, books have always been a big part of life, so here, in no particular order, I give you my top ten. These aren’t the most intellectual books I’ve read (or in the case of A Brief History of Time…tried to read) but their the ones that had the biggest impact on me or the ones I enjoyed reading and re-reading again and again.

American Gods – Neil Gaimen
Quite possibly my favourite book. I was introduced to Neil Gaimen through ‘The Kindly Ones’, the ninth book of his award winning comic book series ‘The Sandman’. After finding out more about his work I went in search of American Gods, and I’m so happy I did. The story of how old nearly forgotten Gods survive on what little worship they can muster, American Gods is an adventure story, a study in religion, a road trip book and is full of undying love, horror, humour and suspense. In my opinion it is literary brilliance.

Blankets – Craig Thompson
This wedge of 582 page graphic novel (that’s quite a bit for a single story in the comic world) was a present from a very good friend. I lugged this heavy bastard of a book home with me, made a cup of tea and started reading….I could not put it down. Taking place over a few years in the life of author Craig Thompson, this autobiographical story is told as recounted memories of his Evangelical Christian upbringing, his first love, his sexual awakenings and his confusing coming of age. Set mainly in the mid nineties, Blankets is full of outstanding emotional artwork and nice references to awesome music (the characters all dig punk and grunge) and took me back to my own teenage years and memories. The only graphic novel I’ve read that brought tears to my eye’s but not the best introduction to the world of comics yet its still one of the best.

Nineteen Eighty-Four – George Orwell
For years I heard people talking about how amazing this book was so I thought ‘right…I really should read it’. Those people weren’t wrong. A truly sinister look into a totalitarian future (it was published in 1949) it shows a world where the government have absolute non-negotiable control over everything, including your thoughts, using the moniker Big Brother and have the ability to change history to suit there current outlook without a single question raised from the populace. Growing up in the aftermath of World War II, protagonist Winston Smith has foggy memories of his childhood and after being asked to erase information that would change history he starts to internally question the government’s motives and power. Nineteen Eighty-Four also contain the best ending of a book ever, as soon as I read the last word I was absolutely speechless. Unfortunately, I was last reading it on the way to a film set the other day and I left it behind and my mate is still looking after it for me!

Northern Lights – Philip Pullman
This is one of the best children’s books and a great way to get kids to start reading more than the Beano (is that still going?). The first in Pullmans His Dark Materials trilogy, Northern Lights, now filmed as The Golden Compass, is a proper adventure book. As a young teen I could often be found on sunny days sitting in my room reading about the friendships and adventures of Lyra Belacqua and her dæmon Pantalaimon (everyone in this parallel world has their own dæmon, as they are physical manifestations of their souls). I’m not sure why I’ve always loved fantasy stories, maybe it’s due to me not having a spiritual side, I need them as a way of escaping reality….hmmm, one to ponder.

Mort – Terry Prachett
The fourth in the huge collection of Pratchetts Discworld novels, I have read nearly all of them and loved them all, so it was difficult to choose one to put in this list, so I figured, it should be the first I read. Taking place on the impossible Discworld (a round flat world that rests on the backs of four elephants that stand on the shell of a giant turtle that swims through space!), Mort is the story of a young simple lad with no aspirations who, after the advice given by his father to become an apprentice, is taken on by Death. The nature of Death is explored in Pratchetts own humour filled way while Mort learns the ropes and tries to ignore his confusing feelings towards Deaths adopted daughter. A great addition to this shelf filling series.

American Psycho – Bret Easton Ellis
This is a scary book! I find watching someone’s decent into madness so much worse than ghouls and monsters, and that is exactly what we get with Patrick Bateman. On the surface Bateman is just another 80’s stupidly rich yuppie investment banker, but we also get an in depth view of his insanity. Beginning with relatively harmless madness with just constantly checking clothing choices and holding in his anger when one of his friends has a better business card than him, Bateman deteriorates through imaging killing to committing horrific acts of violence (if you’ve read it…think back to the drainpipe and the rat *shudder*). American Psycho can sometimes be a difficult read with it constantly explaining in detail every item of clothing of every character and Batemans occasional internal rambling monologues, but seeing as the book is narrated by Patrick it is all necessary to get a complete overview of the character. If you haven’t read it, put aside a few weeks and immerse your self in madness.

Fox in Socks – Dr. Suess
Dr Suess was a genius. His non-sensical tongue twisters designed to help children learn sounds and speech patterns are some of my favourite poetry, and Fox in Socks is a collection of some of his best. I still struggle with the Tweetle Beetles but can recite the story of Luke Luck and his Duck by heart!

Yes Man – Danny Wallace
This is the most dangerous book I’ve ever read, more dangerous than Mein Kampf and more dangerous that The Anarchists Cookbook (the latter of which I’ve read), purely because while reading it you will feel compelled to say yes to anything. While reading this, a friend suggested I attend an Alpha Course, which is why I attend a church every Wednesday to join a group of Christians talk about God (as an atheist, this is annoying, boring and sliiightly maddening!) and why I am saving up for a passport to go to Hamburg, which is an absolute must as I mentioned it on twitter and Danny Wallace himself wrote back to me saying I should do it! YesMan is based upon a year of the authors life in which, after living the life of a recluse for a while, he decides to get more out of life by saying yes to any and every opportunity. A very funny tale of danger, excitement, adventure and eventual love, YesMan is a brilliant feel good book that will make you want to get more out of life. (and er, Danny, if you ever read this, I really wasn’t comparing you to Hitler in the first sentence…it’s the first dangerous book I thought of)

Born Standing Up – Steve Martin
The Jerk, Planes, Trains and Automobiles, Dead Men don’t Wear Plaid, all very very funny films, but how did Steven Martin end up there? In Born Standing Up we find out about Steve’s childhood, his first job at DisneyLand, his first foray into the world of showbiz during his stint as shop assistant in a magic shop and his move into stand up comedy. A must for any fan of Steve or the surreal side of stand up (which we find out Steve was one of the pioneers of).

Factotum – Charles Bukowski
I had been out drinking with some friends, my mate let me crash on his settee, and in my insomniatic drunken stupor I fumbled about after everyone had gone to bed looking for something to do. I stumbled across a book and decided it would probably help me get to sleep if I read something. Factotum didn’t help, it kept me awake till morning. Written about Bukowski’s alter ego Henri Chinaski, we see the life of an alcoholic, constantly unemployed writer who cant get anything published even though he knows his work is much better than what is being released. Through half-hearted relationships and his need for cheap wine, Henri’s tale is heart-breaking in a ‘there but for the grace of God go I’ way and a compelling, involving book written by someone with a mastery of words.

Stefans TV Picks: 24th May 2010

Monday 24th
Ignoring the annoying script and its bum-numbing runtime, Titanic did give us the pairing of Leonardo DiCaprio and Kate Winslet, a pair able to convey the feeling of adventure and love in an otherwise pretty mediocre movie. We get to see this partnership once again on Sky Movies Drama and Romance at 22.10 in Revolutionary Road. Join the Wheelers in 1950’s suburban America as boredom and a failing marriage start to take over their façade of a perfect happy home life. Winslets performance is absolutely worthy of her Golden Globe win and Oscar Nomination, she acts everyone off the screen in her flawless portrayal of housewife April as she struggles to keep up the appearance of doting wife and mother while the desire to escape gnaws away within. If you can’t be in to see it, set it to record, you won’t be sorry.

Tuesday 25th
Hmmm, Tuesdays….I’m not sure what happens on Tuesdays but there’s never anything on that really says WATCH ME WATCH ME! So once again I shall resort to my favourite hobby, watching films, and once again I shall turn to Sky Movies Drama and Romance for Once, playing at 16:45 and again at 23:30. If you do take my advice and watch this, have a box of tissues ready, I unashamedly admit to crying every time I watch this film about the growing relationship between Czech immigrant girl (played by Marketa Irglova…if your anything like me, you’ll fall in love with her a lil bit) and Irish busker boy (Glen Hansard). With an outstanding original soundtrack, mostly written by Hansard and Irglova, Once is one of those films that make you so happy and really sad at the same time. A masterpiece of independent cinema.

Wednesday 26th
I’m finding it difficult to suggest anything this week that isn’t movie related, I mean today on Sky 1 at 20:00…Dogs in Frocks (yes its exactly what it suggests) or the tedious Justin Lee Collins ranting and raving in his ‘wacky’ way about trying to enter the Eurovision Song Contest (Eurovision, Channel 5, 22:00) I cant think of any reason to watch these and I’m not a fan of repeating recommendations like The Big Bang Theory at 23:05 on Channel 4 (although everyone should defiantly watch this), so back to movie related programmes it is. Today it’s thanks go to ITV. The National Movie Awards at 20:00 will bring us glitz, glamour, beautiful people and a sneaky peek at the much anticipated (by me anyway) Toy Story 3.

Thursday 27th
BBC2, 19:00, The Culture Show…A-HA I hear you cry, in a week of movie related Picks you are choosing a TV show, but await dear Reader; I am merely suggesting this programme due to one of its segments. In today’s episode, as well as delving into the history of Westminster Abbeys gargoyles, a visit to the funny folk at The Onion and a preview of the new Mostyn gallery in Wales which promise to be pretty interesting, Mark Kermode and Miranda Sawyer debate the choice between Movies and Theatre. I’ll be backing Kermode!

Friday 28
Lost…..I’ve never watched a single one episode, but apparently it finishing and it’s a big momentous thing, my Lost Fanboy friends would probably tell me off for not saying it so Sky 1 from 20:00 onwards sit back and watch the two and a half hour double episode finale that’ll answer all the questions that need to be answered, maybe after I can continue in a conversation instead of it turning to ‘oooo what’s the smoke monster about?’ ‘What about that polar bear?’ ‘What’s down the hole?’ ‘WHAT THE HELL IS GOIN ON?’ and maybe where on earth the folk on the island got access to toothbrushes, razors and hair products? (keeping in the movie theme…a two and a half hour episode is more than most movie runtimes, so I count it as a film)

Saturday 29th
I don’t know anyone who doesn’t like The Rolling Stones, even those who say they don’t probably like their songs but don’t know it’s them playing it, which is why I’m suggesting The Stones in Exile: An Imagine Special on BBC2 at 23:10. This documentary presented by Alan Yentob chronicles the bands recording of their 1972 acclaimed record Exile on Main Street. This revealing account shows their chaotic lifestyle while taking up residence in the French Riviera after fleeing the UK for not paying taxes. Should be an interesting programme for fans and non-fans alike (and will probably have you asking the question…why are we lumbered with musicians like Justin bloody Bieber these days?)

Sunday 30th
Imagine a flat round world, now imagine that world resting on the backs of four elephants, now imagine those elephants standing on the shell of a giant turtle that swims through space….that turtle is the Great A’Tuin, and that world is the Discworld. It’s on this bizarre world that Terry Pratchetts novel (the 33rd in a series of 38) Going Postal takes place, and which has now been made into a two part series for Sky 1 and will be shown at 18:00. Magic, action and almighty cons are rife in the story of swindler Moist Von Lipwig as he takes on the job of PostMaster, in a not so much ailing as decrepit Post Office, in a bid to escape the Hangmans noose. After some disappointing previous Discworld series’ (why they cast David Jason as Rincewind still confuses me) I’m hoping they make up for it with Going Postal, casting Tamsin Grieg is a step in the right direction. As an owner of a majority of the Discworld books this is one I’m looking forward too!

Stefan Reviews: Four Lions

Chris Morris has always skipped merrily down his own road of good intentions hand in hand with his friend controversy and this has led to him being both admired and detested. With shows like The Day Today and Brass Eye to his name, he has been known to tackle and take the mick out of pretty serious issues (the outstanding BrassEye Special that warned us all of a Paedogeddon springs to mind) and after his comparatively tame appearances in The IT Crowd or his Shoreditch wanker ribbing sitcom Nathan Barley his new Islamic suicide bombing comedy Four Lions certainly lives up to his ‘Media Terrorist’ label.

The film centres around five would be martyrs as they plan to show the Western World what is it is to be (in their ill conceived notion filled minds) a true follower of Islam. It’s easy to feel hatred for someone who would take the lives of innocent people in the name of a belief, but somehow, while the Lions are plotting a horrific event and along with all the laughs, sympathy washes over you from the screen. The audience seem to forget what the characters true intentions are as they watch Omar (played by Riz Ahmed as the obvious brains in the group) display a happy and playful home life with his wife and son or hearing Fessal (Adeel Akhtar) speak lovingly about his dad. Although sympathetic and very funny, there is still a vein of unease running throughout Four Lions, watching parents tell their young child about the glory of martyrdom or seeing Omar knowingly brainwash his dim-witted but pleasant brother, Wej (Kayvan Novak), into ignoring his feelings and look forward to an eternity that can only be compared to the greatness of the Rubber Dinghy Rapids at Alton Towers, makes you wonder if you should really be laughing.

The same can be said for Barry (Nigel Lindsay) who comes across as being a British convert purely as release for his racism towards Jews, anything that goes wrong for him and it’s the Jews fault (even when his car breaks down he blames the Jewish parts). While still a truly horrible person, Barry brings so much humour through his ineptness, stupidity and anger when the others of the group happily insult him to his face while speaking in Urdu. As an outsider, Barry adds an element of hostility in an otherwise close knit team who are able to share jokes while planning destruction and dance along to Toploaders awful song ‘Dancing in the Moonlight’ together. Using this closeness as an ongoing theme, Four Lions fails to ask the question why? Why do these young men who don’t seem to be suffering that much and are not oppressed at all want to blow themselves up. The only answer we seem to get is because of all the ‘Jews and slags an that’ but seeing as this film isn’t a political thriller it doesn’t really need to answer those questions and is happy to stay in the Secret Flat arseing about with explosives!

Judging by Morris’ past efforts Four Lions doesn’t court controversy quite as much as some expected, and would perhaps have worked better a few years ago, but it is still very very funny and should be seen before it ends its cinema run.

Four Lions is rated (15) and is still playing at most cinemas.

Next Week's TV Picks

Monday 17th
George Clooney is an odd one. He can go from an out an out blockbuster that everyone in the world will see (even those without TV’s had Ocean’s 11 beamed into their brains via satellite) to little movies that still cost as much but not many know about, and he still holds his credibility. I am speaking, of course, about Welcome to Collinwood on BBC 1 at 23:20. Clooney plays the wheelchair bound old acerbic Safe Cracker hired by a motley band of crooks who share a goal of obtaining the biggest score of their lives, their ‘Bellini’. With a brilliant cast including Sam Rockwell, William H Macy and Michael Jeta, Collinwood is a silly yet excellent crime caper that’ll make you late for work on Tuesday but is absolutely worth it.

Tuesday 18th
Music Award shows annoy me, filled with prancing posing idiots fuelling themselves on champagne for a night of self indulgence, Damon Albarn worship and dancing on tables because their “so mad”. The Classical Brit Awards 2010 (ITV, 22:35) will be oh so different. Presented by classical crumpet Myleene Klass, this event will be full of brilliant performances (one of which by Bryn Terfel…..awesome) so get a glass of good wine and turn the volume up. But before this make sure your watching BBC 1 at 21:00 to see our fair Editor Miss Catherine Balavage committing acts of violence upon Paul McGann in Luther.

Wednesday 19th
YAAAAAAYYYYY THE BIG BANG THEORY IS BACK!
Finally after a weird disappearance from our screens for two months the rest of season 3 is continuing on Channel 4 at 22:55 (why it’s on so late confuses me). After a double date with Howard and Bernadette, Leonard and Penny’s relationship suffers a blow after Penny tells of her belief in psychics. Meanwhile Raj recruits Sheldon as his wingman as the pair attend a University Mixer in an attempt to score!…….I love this show.

Thursday 20th
I wasn’t expecting to like Forgetting Sarah Marshall (showing at 20:00 on Sky Movies Comedy), but one day after finding nothing else to watch I decided to give it a go and found that it’s surprisingly entertaining. I thought this lighthearted, sweet story of a man trying to get his ex would be overshadowed by Russell Brand overtly parodying himself, but his performance is believable and down to earth, and with a very good if small role by Jonah Hill this is my recommendation for the 20th. Oh and at 22:00 turn over to Channel 4 to hear Charlie Brooker yell about the TV that none of us should watch in You Have Been Watching.

Friday 21st
I missed The Wrestler when it came out at the cinema, and this annoyed me. So I’m definitely going to be tuning into Sky Premier at 22:00 to see this award winning film. The story of an aging pro-wrestler trying to come to terms with hanging up his shorts and living his life outside the ring, re-patching his role as father to the daughter he abandoned, attempting to tell a stripper how he really feels for her and having to work a dead end job while struggling with his deteriorating health, The Wrestler is one to watch.

Saturday 22nd
I don’t know if I like Michael Moore, his films give good messages and highlight problems that might otherwise go ignored to anyone not experiencing them, but he uses cheap tricks and propaganda to deliver them. Case in point, in Sicko he tells of the UK’s brilliant health care system by interviewing a well paid and very well off GP…and that’s it, he doesn’t share the information about the lack of Mid-Wives, the struggling NHS, the MRSA debacle etc etc. But all this said, like I stated, it’s the message he delivers that’s important, and Capitalism: A Love Story on Channel 4 at 22:15 tells us of the capitalist tendencies of major US corporations and lets us know how the rich stay rich and how the poor are kept poor. Sure to be insightful, shocking and entertaining…but beware the propaganda!

Sunday 23rd
It seems I’m ending this week with a bunch of movies, but seeing as that’s how I spend the most of my time (when I’m not playing Half-Life2) it’s appropriate. Sunday’s choice is the outstanding Frost/Nixon on Sky Movies Crime and Thriller at 15:15. This dramatisation shows the series of interviews given by David Frost to ex President Richard Nixon, which came very close to the ex Oval Office dweller admitting guilt for the Watergate Scandal and uttering the shocking statement of ‘When the President does it, it’s not illegal’. Strange to think that that bloke off Through the Keyhole went up against such a formidable foe and came out on top! Make sure you don’t miss this.