I'm a Sega Mega Drive, and being AWESOME was my idea! {Ceri's Column}

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They really don’t make video game systems like this anymore! Sure, games these days are flashier, more expensive, have better graphics, cooler music and snappy writing and have more storyline-based sexiness blah blah blah…but I can’t help but feel…I LOVED THE SEGA MEGA DRIVE MORE.

Call of Duty Modern Warfare 2 is all very well and good but I don’t feel like I’m “playing” anymore. The Sega was like…a toy…you remember…fun? Escapism?

Most of my school mates circa 1995 were still playing the pantsy little SNES. Seriously, this console makes Hello Kitty look positively mantacular. I was too busy fighting Doctor Robotnik as my speedy blue hedgehog alter ego to care about the mushroom killing exploits of a beer-bellied Italian plumber.

The one all-conquering ultra game that proves beyond all possible argument that the Mega Drive roolz (yes I spelled it like that, fucking deal with it you square):

Toejam and Earl!

For you unenlightened few who are yet to bask in the glory –

In 1991 Johnson Voorsanger Productions made a game about two space alien rappers who crash land on earth. In this 3D roving, birthday present collecting, elevator finding, wise cracking super-game, 1 or 2 players control either red three-legged Toejam or Hawaiian short-wearing slightly obese Big Earl. You walk about the randomly generated worlds trying to recover bits of your broken spaceship. On the way you encounter troublesome Earthlings like the lil’ devils, hula girls, phantom ice cream trucks and marauding bands of tomato-cannon firing chickens.

YES! It is this insane. YES! It is that good! Get on eBay and buy it. Seriously now. Buy a Sega Mega Drive to play it on as well…I probably should have mentioned that first… You can get the console for £30 or thereabouts and Toejam and Earl (the 1st one, the sequal was wank) for a few quid, but they probably cost much less on eBay!

This game is the bollocks! I guarantee that within 5 minutes of playing it you’ll be quoting it for years. I have…

God I need a life…JAMMIN’!

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=33iYLYRMLSk

0 thoughts on “I'm a Sega Mega Drive, and being AWESOME was my idea! {Ceri's Column}

  1. Ta for all the kudos my man. I’ve just knitted some lovely socks with it…them? fuck. with the kudos. capiche? yeh…

    use Icarus wings/Inner tube/Jet boots to the bottom left corner then fall into paradise. Sublime gaming that is yet to be topped.

  2. dude, i’m so glad you said Toejam & Earl, it was one (if not the) best game on the Mega Drive.
    Unfortunately this game had such an impact on me that any open map game with the sea in it meant i had to swim for miles off land looking for that hidden island with the smoothie hut an the girls in the hot-tub! Best in-game Easter Egg ever, and this was before Easter Eggs were anything except big bits of chocolate. Kudos to the game and to you sir.