Unknown pleasures

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Unknown Festival site

Croatia didn’t have the best of it in the 20th century. Occupied by pretty much everyone with a standing army and a superiority complex (Austro-Hungary, then Germany and Italy, a bit more by Hungary and finally by Yugoslav communists) its post-communism civil war only ended in 1995. Since then it’s managed rather better, becoming the world’s 18th most popular tourist destination, the 28th member of the European union, and (if my acquaintance is anything to go by), the number one destination for unstoppable lads looking to get tanked up and forget they work in finance.

But more important than all that: it is now the country the brains behind Field Day and Hideout have chosen to bless with the inaugural extravaganza of sun, sea and pumping dance music that will be new festival Unknown.

The biggest luminaries of the genre will be there, from disclosure, to Julio Bashmore, to SBTRKT, to the horrors, to my own personal favourites Clean Bandit.

The picturesque town of Rovinj, an unsuspecting coastal jewel of less than 15,000 people is set to be overrun by European party types from the 10th to the 14th of September.

Now, festival previews invariably tend to refer to those pitching up as “revellers”, something which I for some reason find rather irritating. So… attendees will have the choice of either camping out under the stars, in what is expected to be 25 degree weather or they may, like me, stay in an air conditioned apartment complete with bathroom, kitchen, terrace and beautiful people.

The music will be split across 4 stages: the main; the pool; the forest; and mad ferret’s mirror world (think lasers, vortexes and illuminated trees). Given the line-up these should all be pretty spectacular, but what I’m really looking forward to are the 18 or so boat parties. these will feature some of the world’s biggest djs playing intimate sets to 200 lucky… people present in blazing sunshine on the Adriatic Sea. Gonna be a shit time. Most of these are sold out now, but if you’re willing to try your luck there are usually a few struggling souls (for whom the idea of 3 hours on water has become about as appealing as a gooseberry and acid smoothie) who are looking to sell their tickets.

If all the sea, sun and sand gets a bit much, the forest stage, open from 4pm till 6am, promises an ethereal, sun-filtering backdrop to some delightfully deep house. Think Cyril Hahn, Jamie xx and Henrik Schwarz.

Incidentally, if you fancy getting a bit closer to nature (that is, stripping to your wristwatch and going for a hazardous walk in the woods) then you might be interested to know that there’s nowhere better than Croatia – it is world famous for its naturist resorts and about apparently about 15% of the country’s 10 million visitors pack little more than sun cream and a suspicious looking raincoat (n.b. unknown is not a naturist festival).

Otherwise, we recommend short shorts, blinding neon vests and patent leather jazz shoes. Or flip flops.

We hope to see you there. If you see someone wearing patent leather jazz shoes it will probably be me. Come say hi.

You can buy tickets for unknown at http://www.unknowncroatia.com/#tickets17