The Secret Garden Party

So with the initial line up for 2015 released this week, I think it’s about time to gush a bit about my festival of last summer.

The Music
As the sun went down over the main stage on a balmy Saturday evening Sub Motion Orchestra revealed themselves as the standout performers of the festival for me. Theirs was the kind of bass that makes the earth, not shake, that wouldn’t be the right word, but sway in a luxurious, sensual manner. Ruby Wood’s ethereally jazzy vocals were the cherry on a quite delectably sexy cake. Clean Bandit have really upped their game since doing the festival rounds in 2013, commanding the main stage with tens of thousands of festival goers singing back their lyrics. And for the late night lovers, Sigma “absolutely smashed it” (as Cheryl Cole might say) in Temple of Boom post 3am. My only personal disappointment was standing pride of place on the top platform of the Collisillium, having elbowed hundreds of people out of the way, waiting for this year’s secret act to perform (Chase and Status again…) at the stroke of midnight – Only to be left waiting… and waiting… and waiting… Rumour has it they finally rocked up over two and a half hours late. Not. Cool.

The Locale
This really was the ultimate adult’s playground, whether you like it colourful, eerie, hard-core or filled with sunflowers, there was a playground for every personality. There was also the option of swimming in the lake, which might sound spontaneous but after you’d donned your sexiest swimsuit you were left standing in line for the best part of an hour waiting to be refreshed (or, let’s be honest, have a replacement bath). To be fair the excessive queue was no doubt due to the scorchingly hot weather we enjoyed at SGP this year (Sorry (not sorry) to all of you who pinned your festival hopes and dreams on Glastonbury but forewent your summer glow for trench foot). From secret tunnels, floating dance floors, winding forests and colossal stages to fields filled to the brim with 6 foot tall giant sunflowers hidden behind a secret portaloo door – the one thing we can all admit is the hills of Abbots Ripton are transformed into something truly magical, that even Alice in Wonderland would gawk at.

Local Wildlife
The clientele cannot go unmentioned. It seemed like this year’s festival had an unparalleled supply of beautiful people – everywhere you looked you saw another “genetic lottery winner”, as one companion commented. As ever, body paint, glitter and “quirky” headwear were all the rage. Meaning the usually bold and unique individual fizzled into the crowd. Those who really wanted to stand out, and there were quite a few, dispensed with the outfits altogether, some choosing to don only carefully applied body paint and a few of the most adventurous opting for just the glow of the summer sun and a dab of moisturiser. For the sake of their nipples, I sincerely hope one with SPF.

Inevitable Celebrity Sighting
This bit all depends on your definition of “celebrity”… you could feast your eyes on pretty much the entire cast of Made in Chelsea. Alex Mytton even made the sought-after headlines of Daily Mail Online with his episode of “exhaustion”. For the more refined celebrity oglers, his royal highness (absolutely no pun intended) Prince Harry graced us with his presence in full Secret Garden Party glittery glory with his face painted a smirf-tastic shade of ‘royal’ blue.

Transcendent-moment-where-everything-makes-sense
As the sun dipped behind the horizon on the Saturday evening, it was replaced by a spectacle of fiery colourful delight with the annual SGP fireworks extravaganza. I think you’d be hard pressed to find a Secret Gardener who didn’t suddenly think their drink had been spiked with the best type of acid, when a plane flying low rained giant bubbles over the entire festival’s heads. This, combined with the darting lasers piercing the wobbly, translucent globules made for a truly incredible vision. The whole of the main stage appeared to be covered in glittering fairy dust. Either that … or the drive to the festival from the station with the utterly charming former Police Constable Simon, now of ‘Steve’s Cars’. Simon you are an utter legend.

words by Olivia Outram