Tag Archives: carers

Living with Alzheimers – A New Challenge for 2020 by Chris Suich

Posted on by

new challenge for 2020 Bob Suich Chris Suich

Welcome to the New Year 2020! Christmas came and went. We had a pleasant enough one without incident. Can’t say that of the new year though.

The first few days of 2020 were a bit of a challenge. I noticed Bob’s ankle was a bit puffy after his bath. I’ll have to keep an eye on that, I thought. Perhaps his sock was too tight around his ankle, but I thought I’d put on his open topped non-elastic ones.

The next day his lower left leg was huge and his foot resembled a block of lard. No understanding or pain noted from Bob.  It was Saturday, no GP available. I went on the NHS website to check and rang 111 just to make sure I wouldn’t be wasting anyone’s time if I took him to the ’Walk in Care’ at the local hospital. I realised it probably was a blood clot as the answers pointed to that. The lady rang me back from the NHS helpline to tell me I’d got an appointment for 8.30pm and to take him in. We were seen by 11.30pm.

It was an endurance test for us both. Bob wanted to go to bed, he’d been saying this every two minutes since 3pm and was getting more and more distressed.

‘Let’s do a runner,’ he whispered conspiratorially. It crossed my mind. Then he’d ask everyone if they were a doctor and that he thought it was ridiculous that there were no doctors there. If someone spoke loudly or a child squealed it upset him.

There was a blood clot. He had a scan to confirm on the following Monday. We had to go in again on the Sunday and Monday for an Injection of blood thinner in his tummy; another endless wait.

Finally, I think the penny dropped that waiting for hours for a two minute injection was stressful for Bob and the waiting audience of patients. I was presented with 10 injections, a safe needle disposal box and told to get on with it. Nurse Suich at your service!

Poor Bob. I was now the baddy, hurting his tummy every night. What fights we had getting that needle in – and how close did I come to getting it in me, not Bob.  A Carry On film comes to mind.

I still feel though the physical side of caring isn’t the hardest part: the hardest part is the loss of freedom, the absolute tie, the relentlessness of the duty, the repetitive nature, the hyper vigilance of constant watching, the fact you can no longer call your life your own.

Living with Alzheimers – A Carer’s Story by Chris Suich

Posted on by

Living-with-Alzheimers-Chris-Bob-Suich

In 2012 my husband, Bob, was diagnosed with Amnesia and we were told it could become Dementia. Three years later he was diagnosed as having vascular dementia. However, after two weeks in hospital in 2018 with severe anxiety linked to the condition, we finally saw a dementia specialist who diagnosed Alzheimers. Nothing could prepare us as a family for the devastating news – and that there was no cure. To see this dynamic and clever man become so dependent and scared of day to day things was devastating. My life now revolves around caring for the man I have been with for over 40 years.

I met Bob whilst having a gap year working on Cleethorpes Pier before starting a degree at Hull University. I was only 17, but we got on so well and shared so many interests that we became inseparable. We married a year later. Bob was theatre manager on the pier and went on to pursue a career in tourism and leisure, and I put my degree on hold to support him in his anti-social hours and bringing up our two boys, Joseph and Edward.

Whilst they were babies I enrolled in the Open University and after six years managed to gain a BA in English, History and Cultural Studies. After a year I started teaching full time at a local primary school. Bob’s career grew and soon he was in charge of tourism and leisure for East Lindsey District Council in Lincolnshire. We met many stars of show business such as Norman Wisdom, Ken Dodd, Joe Pasquale, Lulu, and Barbara Windsor, who sadly also suffers from Alzheimers.

Bob worked hard and had a knack for securing TV appearances. He would follow up every bit of publicity he could, including swimming in the sea in January to prove how clean the water was after gaining a Blue Badge award.

He was managing a huge budget, a very successful manager and well-liked by his many staff. We had a great life. but so much has changed since his diagnosis.

Life isn’t easy but we do manage to share lots of fun and laughter. In sharing our story, I hope to cast a little awareness of what it’s like to be a carer for someone living with dementia.

A typical Sunday in our house.

Bob has taken to waking up very early. Today it was 4.00 am.

‘Hello ‘ he says. ‘ Are we getting up yet?’

‘It’s early, go back to sleep,’ I say. ‘I’m not at school today.’

Then the restlessness starts. We manage a few more hours then I give in, get him up, bathed, hair washed all clean set of clothes, wet shaved, pills, hair combed and all the other small things it takes to get him ready for the day. It’s exhausting and the day’s barely begun. He looks smart and well though, so it’s worth it.

We listen to the news whilst we share our morning coffee, having a discussion of the likelihood of which Tory will become the next prime minister. Bob has me howling as he has a complaint about them all.

Then it’s out for Sunday lunch at a friend’s house. Bob eats a small plateful, but I have to chop it up and feed him as he never manages more than a few spoonfuls himself. He’ll say he’s finished but I can usually get more down him as he forgets what he’s said.

When we get home another friend calls in for a glass of wine. He sits with Bob and they enjoy a beer for an hour. Bob ‘loves him’ because he knows him and feels safe. This gives me a break as I have real problems keeping Bob occupied. He wants to do something all the time, but his concentration is nil and so I’m not able to get on with as much as I’d like.

I put ‘Babe’ on the TV for Bob while I mow the grass. He enjoys children’s films as the story is not difficult to follow. I try to dodge the showers and just manage it before the heavens open. When it stops our friend helps me dig some plants in and put the heavy green bin out for dustbin men.

Our friend leaves and we settle down on the sofa, side by side, to watch footie for a bit. If it goes to penalties I might just be able to escape to do the pack ups and the organisation for work tomorrow.

Then out comes the doodle book with his nice new pencil crayons. He lasts fifteen minutes but I am cajoling him the whole time.

Getting Bob to bed is a huge undertaking as by 9.00 pm he is tired and irritable. I start by getting him in his pjs. He complains about getting changed as he wants to go to bed in his clothes. I have to manoeuvre his arms and legs as he can’t do it himself and his arms are stiff as he no longer knows what to do to get undressed.

Then the teeth.

‘Oh, not that!’ he says.

He hates the sound of the motor on the electric toothbrush and I have to brush his teeth as he would never do them.

Then the pills.

‘Not them’ he says.

Bob is on a cocktail of tablets: one for his memory, one for anxiety and several others. Then we go downstairs for a glass of ‘something lovely’ – part of the deal for co-operating in the getting ready for bed routine. Bed by 10.00 -10.30pm and Bob goes out like a light.

Whereas I am laid awake thinking; thinking about how my life has changed, how Bob must feel so bewildered, and how I’m going to have the strength to start it all again tomorrow.

 

 

Work From Home Week 2015 – 19th to 25th January

Posted on by

working from home, work, home workingAs someone who works from home I can vouch for its good points and its bad ones. Mostly it is great, offering flexibility and the chance to work to the best of your potential. No nasty commute needed so it is good for your bank account and the environment too. In fact, this is Work From Home Week and in June 2014, new rights to flexible working laws were introduced in the UK, declaring that all employees – who have worked for the same employer for at least 26 weeks – are eligible to request flexible working, including the option of working from home. In fact, most recent figures now show that around 14% of people in employment are working from home, highlighting the idea that it’s increasingly becoming a viable and attractive alternative for businesses.

Launched in 2003, Work From Home Week, running from the 19th to 25th of January, puts a spotlight on this rising figure, raising awareness of working from home for both employers and employees alike.

In a time of constantly evolving technology, it’s never been easier to access information away from the office, so we’re calling on employers to embrace the opportunity as a way to boost happiness and productivity among their employees.

Graham Long, Vice President of the Enterprise Business Team at Samsung UK supports working from home.

‘’At Samsung, we believe it’s vital for people to be given the option and the tools to work flexibly, which is why we view Work from Home Week as an important and worthwhile initiative.

“Our own research reveals over a quarter of workers would opt for flexible working over a pay rise, and more than four in 10 (42%) employees strongly agree with the idea of being able to access work emails and apps outside of official working hours. Despite this, many businesses still don’t trust their employees to do so, highlighting the need to educate enterprises on the benefits of working from home. The option to work more flexibly can have a huge impact on productivity and wellbeing and with advancements in mobile technology, it is now possible for employees to work beyond the confines of the office, making working from home a choice that should be open to all rather than a select few.’’

Of course, for many across the UK, working from home isn’t just for a week. For the hundreds of single parents, carers, injured veterans and those living with disabilities, working from home is a necessity.

To celebrate working from home, the team behind the campaign have compiled the top 5 reasons to consider it!

Money – Not only would you save money on travel costs – train tickets, petrol, parking, etc. – but not eating out for lunch on a regular basis is bound to save you some pennies too. For parents, it gives the opportunity to radically reduce the costs of childcare.

Commute – Forget about delayed trains or road traffic dampening your spirits.

Comfort – Rather than donning a power suit or being restricted to a desk all day, choose your own dress code and working environment.

Green Living – Working from home can help reduce your carbon footprint, conserve office space for your employer, and perhaps most importantly, allow you to be the master of your own environment!

Freedom/Flexibility – Having the freedom to choose your hours and coffee breaks, while not being dragged in and out of corporate meetings all day is something that could potentially boost your overall moral and work ethic. Not to mention it allows you to create that ideal work/life balance.

Work From Home Week runs from the 19th – 25th January 2015. Twitter @WorkFromHomeWK  #WFHW