Author Archives: Frostie

Four Mums In a Boat Book Review

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Four Mums in a Boat: Friends who rowed 3000 miles, broke a world record and learnt a lot about life along the way

The incredible true story of four ordinary working mums from Yorkshire who took on an extraordinary challenge and broke a world record along the way.

Janette, Frances, Helen and Niki, though all from Yorkshire, were four very different women, all juggling full time jobs alongside being mothers to each of their 2 children. They could never be described as athletes, but they were determined to be busy and the local Saturday morning rowing club was the perfect place to go to have a laugh and a gossip, get the blood pumping in the open air, and feel invigorated.

Brought together by their love of rowing, they quickly became firm friends, and it wasn’t long before they cooked up a crazy idea over a few glasses of wine: together, they were going to do something that fewer people than had gone into space or climbed Everest had succeeded in doing. They were going to cross 3,000 miles of treacherous ocean in the toughest row in the world, The Talisker Whisky Atlantic Challenge.

Yes, they had children and husbands that they would be leaving behind for two months, yes they had businesses to run, mortgages to pay, responsibilities. And there was that little thing of them all being in their 40s and 50s.

But two years of planning, preparation, fundraising, training and difficult conversations later, and they found themselves standing on the edge of the San Sebastian harbour in the Canary Islands, petrified, exhilarated and ready to head up the race of their lives.

This is the story of how four friends together had the audacity to go on a wild, terrifying and beautiful adventure, not to escape life, but for life not to escape them.

Frost really loved this amazing story of courage and resilience. It is also a must read for mothers who too often put their life on hold and never put themselves first. Nothing in life comes easy but it is possible to have children and live your life to the full. 

 

Available from amazon.co.uk

World Autism Awareness Week: New film shows how autistic people feel socially isolated

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autism, ASDTo mark World Autism Awareness Week, The National Autistic Society (NAS) have released a powerful new film ‘Diverted’.

The film follows Saskia, an autistic actor, as she experiences sensory sensitivities and unexpected changes to her train journey – changes which can trigger anxiety and even cause people to feel as though they can’t travel. Alongside the film, NAS have released new statistics which demonstrate the everyday challenges some autistic people face, including that 75% of autistic people say that unexpected changes, like train diversions, make them feel socially isolated.

‘Diverted’ forms part of NAS’s Too Much Information campaign which encourages the public to find out more about autism. Please watch it and learn more about the struggles of autistic people.

Philosophy of Religion: A Very Short Introduction

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Philosophy of Religion: A Very Short IntroductionAn enjoyable series. Philosophy of Religion: A Very Short Introduction is a great though-provoking book. Recommended.

What is the philosophy of religion? How can we distinguish it from theology on the one hand and the psychology/sociology of religious belief on the other? What does it mean to describe God as ‘eternal’? And should religious people want there to be good arguments for the existence of God, or is religious belief only authentic in the absence of these good arguments?

In this Very Short Introduction Tim Bayne introduces the field of philosophy of religion, and engages with some of the most burning questions that philosophers discuss. Considering how ‘religion’ should be defined, and whether we even need to be able to define it in order to engage in the philosophy of religion, he goes on to discuss whether the existence of God matters. Exploring the problem of evil, Bayne also debates the connection between faith and reason, and the related question
of what role reason should play in religious contexts. Shedding light on the relationship between science and religion, Bayne finishes by considering the topics of reincarnation and the afterlife.

ABOUT THE SERIES: The Very Short Introductions series from Oxford University Press contains hundreds of titles in almost every subject area. These pocket-sized books are the perfect way to get ahead in a new subject quickly. Our expert authors combine facts, analysis, perspective, new ideas, and enthusiasm to make interesting and challenging topics highly readable.

Philosophy of Religion: A Very Short Introduction is available here.

The History of Physics: A Very Short Introduction

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the history of physicsFrost are a huge fan of the A Very Short Introduction series from Oxford. This book is essential reading. Insightful but never boring.

How does the physics we know today – a highly professionalised enterprise, inextricably linked to government and industry – link back to its origins as a liberal art in Ancient Greece? What is the path that leads from the old philosophy of nature and its concern with humankind’s place in the universe to modern massive international projects that hunt down fundamental particles and industrial laboratories that manufacture marvels?

This Very Short Introduction introduces us to Islamic astronomers and mathematicians calculating the size of the earth whilst their caliphs conquered much of it; to medieval scholar-theologians investigating light; to Galileo, Copernicus, Kepler, and Newton, measuring, and trying to explain, the universe. We visit the ‘House of Wisdom’ in 9th-century Baghdad; Europe’s first universities; the courts of the Renaissance; the Scientific Revolution and the academies of the 18th century; and
the increasingly specialised world of 20th and 21st century science. Highlighting the shifting relationship between physics, philosophy, mathematics, and technology – and the implications for humankind’s self-understanding – Heilbron explores the changing place and purpose of physics in the cultures and
societies that have nurtured it over the centuries.

ABOUT THE SERIES: The Very Short Introductions series from Oxford University Press contains hundreds of titles in almost every subject area. These pocket-sized books are the perfect way to get ahead in a new subject quickly. Our expert authors combine facts, analysis, perspective, new ideas, and enthusiasm to make interesting and challenging topics highly readable.

The History of Physics: A Very Short Introduction is available here. 

 

Anatomy of a Miracle: A Novel* By Jonathan Miles | Recommended Reads

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This imaginative book may be a new genre: a real life novel. About real life US army veteran Cameron Harris and how he miraculously learned how to walk again. Original and gripping. 

A profound new novel about a paralyzed young man’s unexplainable recovery—a stunning exploration of faith, science, mystery, and the meaning of life
 
Rendered paraplegic after a traumatic event four years ago, Cameron Harris has been living his new existence alongside his sister, Tanya, in their battered Biloxi, Mississippi neighborhood where only half the houses made it through Katrina. One stiflingly hot August afternoon, as Cameron sits waiting for Tanya during their daily run to the Biz-E-Bee convenience store, he suddenly and inexplicably rises up and out of his wheelchair.

In the aftermath of this “miracle,” Cameron finds himself a celebrity at the center of a contentious debate about what’s taken place. And when scientists, journalists, and a Vatican investigator start digging, Cameron’s deepest secrets—the key to his injury, to his identity, and, in some eyes, to the nature of his recovery—become increasingly endangered. Was Cameron’s recovery a genuine miracle, or a medical breakthrough? And, finding himself transformed into a symbol, how can he hope to retain his humanity?

Brilliantly written as closely observed journalistic reportage and filtered through a wide lens that encompasses the vibrant characters affected by Cameron’s story, Anatomy of a Miracle will be read, championed, and celebrated as a powerful story of our time, and the work of a true literary master.

Anatomy of a Miracle: A Novel* By Jonathan Miles is available here.

The Doula’s Guide to Empowering Your Birth: A Complete Labor and Childbirth Companion for Parents to Be

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Experienced doula, Linsey Bliss, shows you how to prepare physically and mentally for every element of having a child, from pregnancy to fourth trimester in The Doula's Guide to Empowering Your Birth. Lindsey Bliss, who has assisted as a doula at hundreds of births and is herself a mother of seven, reveals here all the wisdom and advice that doulas share with the new mothers who hire them. The Doula's Guide to Empowering Your Birth covers the period from pregnancy through labor and birth to fourth trimester healing. The focus, however, is on preparing for birth--including topics like how to pick the right childbirth class and the right birthing method. You’ll also see how to assemble the team of professionals, family members, and friends who will support you through labor and birth, and how to approach last-minute decisions about pain medications and cesarean sections. Bliss's tone throughout is at once authoritative and confident as well as warm and encouraging. Her concern in her practice as well as in these pages is to listen to and help secure each new mom's own personal vision of a birthing experience that is safe, fulfilling, and meaningful.

This is a truly wonderful book from a doula who really knows her stuff. Linsey Bliss has seven children. Six of those are biological and she has had two sets of twins. She has also assisted hundreds of births. This book tells you all you need to know about pregnancy, childbirth and even what happens after. This well-written book is enjoyable to read and is like having your own personal doula and best friend in one. Essential. 

Experienced doula, Linsey Bliss, shows you how to prepare physically and mentally for every element of having a child, from pregnancy to fourth trimester in The Doula’s Guide to Empowering Your Birth.

Lindsey Bliss, who has assisted as a doula at hundreds of births and is herself a mother of seven, reveals here all the wisdom and advice that doulas share with the new mothers who hire them.

The Doula’s Guide to Empowering Your Birth covers the period from pregnancy through labor and birth to fourth trimester healing. The focus, however, is on preparing for birth–including topics like how to pick the right childbirth class and the right birthing method. You’ll also see how to assemble the team of professionals, family members, and friends who will support youthrough labor and birth, and how to approach last-minute decisions about pain medications and cesarean sections.

Bliss’s tone throughout is at once authoritative and confident as well as warm and encouraging. Her concern in her practice as well as in these pages is to listen to and help secure each new mom’s own personal vision of a birthing experience that is safe, fulfilling, and meaningful.

The Doula’s Guide to Empowering Your Birth: A Complete Labor and Childbirth Companion for Parents to Be is available here.

 

Almost half of new mums suffer from frightening thoughts or hallucinations

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By Gemma Francis

Almost half of new mums suffer from frightening thoughts or hallucinations – but two thirds of these hide how they feel for fear of being judged negatively or having their baby taken away, a study has found.

The images – which include thoughts of killing or harming their child – are still taboo among mums with just 37 per cent admitting to others how they feel.

The most common thought is a fear that ‘something dreadful will happen to my baby’, with 62 per cent vividly feeling this.

A further 44 per cent were plagued by the belief their baby might die, while 13 per cent have imagined killing or harming their own child.

The study by parenting site ChannelMum.com also found one in 50 even believed ‘my baby hated me’ while one per cent were convinced their mother-in-law was trying to take their baby,

Others had visions of their child being eaten by a crocodile or snatched by the Grim Reaper.

Two in five (39%) felt their child and partner would be ‘better off without me’ and 16 per cent considered suicide.

An additional 31 per cent admit to having an irrational fear that someone ‘will steal or harm my baby’, making it impossible for them to meet or talk to strangers.

Yet despite 43 per cent of mums suffering these extreme thoughts, 65 per cent of those were never told pregnancy and parenthood could affect their mental health.

As a result, one in five (19%) feared they were ‘going mad’ when they fell ill.

Half (49%) of the mums who suffered were also scared of being ‘judged negatively’.

Forty three per cent believed others will think they are a ‘bad parent’, while 26 per cent were ‘ashamed’ of being mentally ill.

The stigma is so great that a disturbing 17 per cent of mums who fall ill admitted they thought about self-harm to try to cope, with one in 20 going on to self-harm.

One of the biggest barriers to getting help is the fear your child will be taken into care.

One in five mums (19%) who suffered mental illness after birth reported refusing to access help in case their child was taken away.

Official NHS figures show just ten to 15 per cent of mums experience serious mental health issues.

But as a result, some experts now believe there could be a ‘hidden epidemic’ of maternal mental illness, as 64 per cent of mums who fall ill never try to get a formal diagnosis so are missed by official figures.

Overall, the survey showed the most common mental health ailment suffered by new mums is anxiety, experienced by 68 per cent of women after birth, alongside 48 per cent who undergo insomnia due to worry.

A further 35 per cent battle Post Natal Depression, a third (33%) become agoraphobic and 23 per cent are hit by panic attacks.

On average, women’s symptoms lasted three to six months, but 29 per cent felt mentally low for a year or longer.

Women were five times more likely to spot their own symptoms with 69 per cent realising themselves they were ill, compared to just 14 per cent whose partners detected they were unwell.

However, almost two in five mums who become ill (38%) never tell anybody how they feel and just a third confide in their GP (33%).

The most common way mums covered up their feelings was to pretend to be ‘fine’ when quizzed on how they felt, with 94 per cent admitting they lied about their feelings.

Lack of sleep was seen as the main trigger for mums falling ill, with 55 per cent believing this contributed to their condition.

A further 54 per cent said they felt ‘emotionally overwhelmed’ as a new parent, alongside 39 per cent who admitted they tried to ‘be the perfect parent’.

Two in five (41%) blamed hormonal changes while 14 per cent pinned the blame on ‘the pressure of living up to others on social media.

As a result, a resounding 80 per cent of mums want society to be more open about maternal mental health issues and the extreme thoughts mums can have.

Seven in ten (69%) want ‘society to realise it can happen to anyone’ while 55 per cent seek reassurances that their child will not automatically be taken into care if they come forward for treatment.

ChannelMum.com founder Siobhan Freegard said: “If your body is broken after birth, everyone understand and supports you.

“But when your mind is broken, mums still feel they have to keep it hidden.

“These thoughts are disturbing and terrifying – but very often they are part of becoming a mum.

“We need to talk about it, normalise it and make mums realise they are not alone. You are not different or ‘going mad’ just because you experience it – but you may need professional care and help.

“I suffered from post natal depression and visualised extreme images after the birth of my first child then tried to cover it up, so I know exactly what women are going through when they hide it.

“There is so much pressure to cope and be the perfect parent that when you are crying inside while everyone around you is smiling, it makes you feel you are failing your baby and your whole family.

“Mums need to know they will get the right support and their baby won’t be taken away.

“With care, compassion and the right treatment, you can get better quickly, bond with your baby and go on to be the parent you want to be.”

ChannelMum.com psychologist Emma Kenny added: “This research has highlighted the plight of large numbers of mums in the UK and evidences that even in 2018 post natal depression is still no closer to being effectively dealt with.

“Good maternal mental health is something that every woman deserves, but due to the lack of knowledge and support this simply isn’t the case, leaving women to deal with some of the most terrifying and debilitating feelings at a time when they should be enjoying their positive new beginnings.

“We need to address this subject openly, removing the shame and stigma so that mums no longer feel that they have to cope alone.”

EXTREME THOUGHTS MOTHERS HAVE EXPERIENCED:
I believed my baby hated me and was trying to kill me
I planned jumping off the balcony with my baby
I thought my flat was haunted and would stay outside from dawn til dusk until my husband got home
I thought my baby would die if I didn’t wash up before my microwave pinged
I saw the Grim Reaper outside my bedroom door
I thought my twins weren’t mine
I thought that my mother in law was planning to take my baby
I thought that baby would die because of germs. So I made everyone disinfect themselves before they could touch him. Someone touched my pram in a supermarket once and I couldn’t move due to fear of contamination. I stood in the cleaning isle vigorously disinfecting my pram.
I believed if I went to sleep, someone would break in and smother us all to death
I wanted to throw my daughter out of the window
I thought a crocodile was trying to eat my baby
I wanted to drive the car into a wall and kill my baby and myself
I cut all my hair off as I thought my baby was eating it and making himself ill
I thought everyone would be better off without me
I imagined an iron melting into my baby’s face
Just blackness, despair like being trapped in thick mud.

 

With a Kiss and a Prayer By Ellie Dean | Recommended Reads

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THE FOURTEETH CLIFFEHAVEN NOVEL BY SUNDAY TIMES BESTSELLING AUTHOR ELLIE DEAN

Cliffehaven, May 1944

The tension is rising for Peggy Reilly and the inhabitants of Cliffehaven as the planes continue to roar above the town and there is still no news of the long-awaited Allied invasion into France. There seems to be no end in sight of this war which has scattered her family and brought conflict right to the door of Beach View Boarding House, but Peggy cannot work miracles and the toll of the war is beginning to weigh on her slender shoulders.

Meanwhile, Ron Reilly has landed himself in hot water with his sweetheart, Rosie – and this time, his Irish charm will not be enough to get him out of trouble.

The war has forever changed the lives of Peggy’s loved ones, but with the promise of an Allied invasion comes the hope that her beloved husband and family will at last be coming home. It will take an enormous amount of spirit to keep that hope alive and bring harmony back to Beach View.

FIND LOVE. FIND HOPE. FIND CLIFFEHAVEN.

With a Kiss and a Prayer is set almost exclusively in Cliffehaven in the heart of Ellie Dean’s world: the Beach View Boarding House. Available from www.amazon.co.uk