Giving Birth – The Real Story

• 72% of mums-to-be are nervous about giving birth
• Over half of respondents (61%) said their births didn’t go according to plan
• The biggest fear (27%) about giving birth was medical complications affecting themselves or their baby
• Almost a quarter (22%) found their birth partners more annoying than helpful

For most women, experiencing pregnancy and giving birth will be one of the most momentous times of their lives, but this doesn’t come without a certain amount of worries and anxiety. New research from The Baby Show with MadeForMums, which will be returning to Kensington, Olympia from the 21st to 23rd October, revealed that 72% of mums-to-be were nervous about the prospect of giving birth with the biggest worry cited as medical complications (27%)  affecting themselves or their baby. This was followed by 18% saying they were scared of unwanted interventions (e.g. inductions, caesarean section or forceps) and then 17% saying they were anxious about not being able to manage the pain.

The research found that while most mums-to-be will stay close to home the nearer the due date gets, some babies are keen to get things moving in unusual or inconvenient places. Of the mums surveyed, 42% went into labour in their home, with 28% in hospital. These were some of the more unusual findings;

• Tube station escalator
• Car showroom
• Whilst watching a live rugby match
• On the A1 motorway
• In IKEA

While the majority of women (92%) chose to have their partners by their side in the birthing room, when it actually came to the labour, almost a quarter (22%) of people admitted they found their birthing partner more annoying than actually helpful, either falling asleep or playing games on their phones whilst mum does all the hard work! Senior midwife, maternity educator and managing director of Marie Louise Maternity, Marie Louise Hurworth says: “Being a birth partner is one of the most important jobs you could have. But it can be challenging and should be taken very seriously. Being there and sensitive to her changing needs will go a long way and set the foundations for your new family. Even if you are unsure of how to help, stand nearby and make eye contact to let her know you are there and willing to help at any opportunity. One of the most important things is that you don’t become disconnected; remember to participate throughout the journey.”

When asked for amusing labour stories The Baby Show were inundated with funny anecdotes from women across the UK including;

• Nina Motylinski-Davies from East Sussex said: “What kept me going throughout my horrendous labour experience was the fact my husband, who after not getting the opportunity to try the gas the first time round, was determined to have a go this time. Put simply, he got absolutely off his face. He climbed into the birthing pool naked, asked the midwife for a margarita, text my Mum saying he could murder a curry when she was actually asking how I was doing, and then danced around the room to Neil Diamond! I look back and laugh now….”

• Clare Boss from London told The Baby Show: “With my first baby, the fire alarm in the hospital went off which resulted in two firemen coming in to check on the room whilst I was legs akimbo and mid-push!!”

• Laura Jackson from Cheshire explained her dramatic birth story: “I opted for a home birth and hired a birthing pool but sadly never got round to using it! I woke in the middle of the night with a small leak, one week over due, which turned out to be my waters breaking. I woke my husband who immediately started filling up the birthing pool whilst I called the hospital who said the midwives would take around an hour to get to my house. Within moments I had a really strong contraction and suddenly I knew my baby’s head was already out. I was desperate to get into the pool but it wasn’t full and my husband was having problems with the valves. He was in complete disbelief and just said ‘the heads not out’ whilst staring at the front door thinking this would make the midwives appear! Thankfully he snapped into action because with the next contraction he literally had to catch our baby. Such an amazing experience but personally I felt it was a shame for happening so fast…”

Wing Yan Lee, Marketing Manager at The Baby Show says: “Birth plans can be a contentious subject and as our results show many births don’t go according to plan. However, most experts would still agree that planning and looking into your birth options is essential, allowing you to prepare and feel in control of your birthing experience, no matter what direction it takes. We have midwives on hand throughout the show who are able to answer any questions or concerns, no matter how big or small, regarding your pregnancy, birth and beyond.”

Marie Louise continues: “Each and every woman is different and has specific individual needs so there is no one rule for all when it comes to labour and birth. As healthcare professionals we focus on women’s individuality and are guided by what women tell us; we then use technology according to the woman’s history and verbal communication to ensure we do our very best to make the entire process as safe, easy and calm as possible. It’s natural to be nervous about your birth and potential intervention but always remember that our aims are reflective of yours to have a happy, healthy mum and baby.”

Once you’ve arrived home and settled into a new routine, another subject you may be thinking about is sex… Am I ready? Will my partner be expecting sex straight away? Will it be hurt? Will it be the same?

The highest number of couples surveyed chose to wait between six weeks to three months before having sex again (42%) whilst one in five (20%) waited just 0 to six weeks. Reassuringly, a quarter of new mums said they didn’t feel self-conscious about their bodies during sex post-baby, and 29% said at first they did but their partners made them feel comfortable and relaxed.

Marie Louise says: “Guidelines suggest that women wait until they “feel ready” to have sex after birth but there isn’t enough discussion about it. Once again, everyone is different and has a unique experience during childbirth. You may have had a home water birth with no complications or you may have had a forceps delivery in hospital. If you have had a C-section, for example, you may feel ready mentally but your wound may need more time to heal. Or maybe you don’t feel ready mentally but your body has healed well. The most important thing is that you do what’s right for you at the right time and always ask a health professional if you are concerned.  If you are experiencing pain during sex postnatally don’t just put up with it, talk about it.”

From the 21st to 23rd October the biggest pregnancy and parenting event of the year, The Baby Show with MadeForMums, will be returning to Olympia, London.  The Show is the must-attend event for mums and dads-to-be and new parents, with over 200 exhibitors showcasing all the latest essentials for your new arrival, plus a stage programme jam packed with fashion shows and informative talks by renowned baby experts.

Advance tickets are available from £12.25, while on-the-door tickets cost £20.  For more information visit www.thebabyshow.co.uk.

Opening times:

Friday 21st, Saturday 22nd and Sunday 23rd October, open from 10:00am-5:30pm each day.