Author Archives: Catherine Balavage

Hampshire style blogger shaves her head to raise vital funds for boy’s Stem Cell treatment

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A 21-year-old girl has shaved her head in a bid to raise the £30,000 a young boy desperately needs for Stem Cell Treatment.

Chloe Miles, from Aldershot, shaved her head to help her friend, four-year-old Enzo, from Odiham, who was diagnosed with Cerebral Palsy when he was just a few months old.

Chloe met Enzo when she began volunteering with Sebastian’s Action Trust, a charity that supports the families of seriously-ill children. Chloe’s younger brother Dylan had Wolf Hirschhorn Syndrome, a rare genetic disorder, and sadly passed away. Shortly after, Chloe began volunteering with the charity and was paired with Enzo and his family to help support them through helping with the shopping, daily household chores or simply playing with Enzo.

Chloe said: “The Trust couldn’t have picked a better match. I very quickly fell in love with Enzo’s cheeky personality and instantly clicked with Enzo’s mum, Caroline. I actually only visited once through the charity before we exchanged numbers and for the last two years I’ve been welcomed as a family friend instead of a volunteer.

“I feel so lucky to be able to watch Enzo and his little brother Luca grow and develop. I volunteered to help Enzo and his family but I think they’ve actually been the ones helping me. When Dylan passed away I had no one to be silly for, no one to entertain and interact with in the way that I’d known for my whole life with Dylan.”

Becoming friends with Enzo helped Chloe enormously through her grieving process, so when Caroline mentioned that they hoped to do Stem Cell treatment to help Enzo’s condition, she desperately wanted to find a way to help them raise the funds.

Chloe decided to shave her head and set up a JustGiving page in the hope that people would donate towards his treatment, and has shared it on social media using ‘#EnzosStemCellAppeal’.

She said: “When I was about seven or eight years old I heard about someone shaving their head for charity and I decided that if Dylan ever needed money raised I would shave my hair off for him. Unfortunately when Dylan got ill there was nothing I could do, there was no treatment and no amount of money could have helped him.

“I’ve seen first hand the effect that the first round of Stem Cell Treatment had on Enzo, his progress was incredible to watch. There is of course no guarantee that the second round will have the same effect but if it does it could improve Enzo’s quality of life drastically and hopefully lead to him living independently when he’s older.”

Chloe shaved her head at The William Cobbett, in Farnham, and held a fundraising day on 2 September.

Although she is still getting used to her short hair, she said she feels fantastic and the amount of support she’s received has been incredible.

So far almost 200 people have donated to Chloe’s JustGiving page and more than £4,400 has been raised out of her £30,000 target.

Enzo’s mother, Caroline, said: “Enzo is such an incredible boy. We do various types of physio with him every day, which he finds difficult and exhausting, but he has such strength and determination, he understands that the work that we do with him is beneficial to his development so he never puts up a fight. He works so hard to achieve what many would consider to be the simplest of tasks, but for Enzo, any achievement is a massive achievement. Life for him is tough, he has to constantly push on and work hard, but he is the happiest little boy, with a fantastic personality, sense of humour and inspirational drive for life.

Stem cell treatment could help Enzo in various ways. This will be his second round. After his first round of treatment we noticed significant changes in his ability. For example, he gained better head control so that he can sit in his chair or supported by me for longer periods of time and gained better fine motor skills, so he is now able to reach for a toy and grasp it in his hand. We hope that another round of treatment will help him to the same degree if not more so.

With the stem cell treatment we hope that in the future, at the very least, Enzo will gain the ability to live as independently as possible. We hope that he will gain even better head, arm and hand control and movement so that he can sit un supported/assisted, be able to lift himself, for example, from a chair to a bed and to gain the skills needed to operate a power wheel chair.”

To donate to the JustGiving page, visit https://www.justgiving.com/crowdfunding/shavingmyheadforenzo

Hape Walk-A-Long Snail Review | Toys

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Frost loves the Hape Walk-A-Long Snail. First of all it is cute and looks so happy. Next, it is also a shape sorter. Your little one can pull it along like a cute companion or sit and play with the snail. It is wooden, high quality and very well made. It is also eco conscious. What more could you want?

When your child starts walking, they’re going to need a faithful companion to explore and play with. This is where the Hape Walk-A-Long Snail comes in to save the day.

This playful little snail will become your child’s favourite toy as he loyally tags along. Once they’ve got used to this friendly snail, they won’t want to go anywhere without him.

The snail is extremely versatile and totes a shell full of wooden blocks that can be removed to not only lighten the load, but also to use as a separate colourful shape sorter toy. You can even set up the blocks to create a “maze” that the snail can navigate through.

Your child can experience the wonders of the Walk-A-Long Snail from as young as 12 months. With the high quality wooden construction, your children are in safe hands and are ready to explore the world around them alongside their playful snail companion.

As with the entire Hape range of products, this unique Walk-A-Long Puzzle has been thoroughly designed to the highest of safety and quality standards. Also, with a commitment to sustainability, Hape only use eco-friendly materials and water based paints in order to produce their much loved products.

Give your child a toy that not only provides hours of entertainment, but also allows them to learn valuable skills, getting them ready for a bright future.

Hape’s Walk-A-Long Snail measures H18.6, W11.2, D30.1cm and is available from Argos for £24.99.

 

Diary of a Freelance Working Mother: On Busybodies

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working mother , parenting, writer, Catherine BalavageIt was Jean Paul Sartre who said that hell is other people, but he did not get it quite right. What he should have said was that hell is other people and their opinions. Now if they can keep those opinions to themselves then it is happiness all-round. I spend large parts of my day not pointing out to someone how much of a jerk they are. An underrated and valuable skill, but one that seems in short supply when you have a child. I am going to do my best to make sure this weeks column is not an all-out rant, but I am going to put out a plea: please stop telling me how to raise my child.

There is a woman in my local area who seems nice enough, yet since my son was about nine months has asked me almost every single time she has seen me why he is not in nursery. Answer: because he is TWO-YEARS OLD. I have tried to explain to her his age and my personal reasons, but each time I am met with a lecture. Because, god forbid, a woman might want to raise her own child, right? Ditto for the fact I also got a long lecture from her on how my son was too old to be in a pram. ‘You are spoiling him’ she said. Never mind the fact that I am pregnant and he had just turned two, no, make him walk along the busy road and have no rest. That is definitely the answer.

Things like this happen all of the time. Some people will just critique. Ask you if your child can do something (competitive parents, they are just the worst), criticise their clothes/nails/cleanliness/hair, or ask a barrage of questions while pulling faces and making comments. Another bugbear is the busybodies who interfere and always think they know best. It does not matter that their children grew up decades ago and they lived in a separate place than you, they will always know exactly what to do in regards to nurseries and schools, as well as where you should take your child. The passing of time means nothing. Everything they did with their child, you in turn must do, because they know best.

I find with busybodies there is a number of things to do. One is smile and nod. Always best with strangers. The second is smile and say you do not agree, or make a joke of it. The best is to ask them nicely and politely to not interfere. The latter is always better with family. They will not stop if you do not tell them their behaviour is unacceptable. They may not even change then, but, trust me, you will feel better. In the meantime keep your head up, work on your sense of humour as it is the only thing that will get you through, and always stand up for yourself.

Please share any similar experience below, or just add your own comments. I would love to know what you think.

 

Frost Loves: Bidvine

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I don’t know about you, but I find searching for service professionals really stressful. The googling, the endless review reading, emailing numerous people, and calling them on the phone. Life is just too short and there should be an easier way to do it. Thankfully, there is. Frost has come across Bidvine.  Bidvine is a marketplace that connects local service professionals to customers. You can get everything from a cleaner to a wedding planner. Bidvine has people who will teach you how to salsa or cook, but it also has people who will assemble flat pack furniture and fix jobs around the house. As it says on the site: ‘your list of unfinished projects does not stand a chance.

Bidvine is easy to use. You answer a few service-specific questions, your job request is then sent to a local trusted professional. Bidvine then put you in touch with the perfect person for the job. They share the answers that you provide to the service-specific questions, your general location, and then they pass along your phone number if you ask them to. They do not share your email. The professionals have reviews and the entire process is hassle free. I have been doing my best to tackle my ever-growing to do list and sites like Bidvine really help. It is a great business idea that has been well executed. Bidvine also have an app which is very handy. So you can slay your chores from your phone Frost loves…

 

https://www.bidvine.com

 

The Seven Imperfect Rules of Elvira Carr By Frances Maynard Book Review

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The Seven Imperfect Rules of Elvira Carr

I really loved this book. It has a lead character with Asperger’s- which I think is a great thing- we need more stories told from different perspectives, and it is just funny and well written, but also sad. It is original and, sometimes, even a bit of a difficult read. Some people take advantage of Elvira and her differences. Even though the book can be sad sometimes it also is uplifting and draws you in. The characters are all brought vividly to life and the story goes along at a good pace. This book won a book competition I entered and I am not even slightly bitter that it won, it was well deserved. A must read.

Funny, heart-warming and ultimately triumphant, The Seven Imperfect Rules of Elvira Carr by Frances Maynard is the perfect story for anyone who doesn’t quite fit in – and for everyone who chooses not to.

Elvira Carr is twenty-seven and neuro-atypical. Her father – who she suspects was in the secret service – has passed away and, after several Unfortunate Incidents growing up, she now spends most of her time at home with her overbearing mother. But when her mother has a stroke and is taken into care, Elvira is suddenly forced to look after herself or risk ending up in Sheltered Accommodation. Armed with her Seven Rules, which she puts together after online research, Elvira hopes to learn how to navigate a world that’s full of people she doesn’t understand. Not even the Seven Rules can help her, however, when she discovers that everything she thought she knew about her father was a lie, and is faced with solving a mystery she didn’t even know existed . . .

The Seven Imperfect Rules of Elvira Carr is available here.

 

Why Your Child Should Have a Double Bed

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So the time has come. We have to buy our little one a bed. An exciting but emotional time for any parent. But what bed to buy? There are a lot of beautiful childrens double beds and buying one for your child may seem like an extravagance, or a waste of space. Children are small so do they really need one? Well I sleep on a king size bed and I think if you have the space it is a great idea. Here is why…

Space

I mean this in two ways. One: your child with have plenty of it and will probably sleep better. They can turn without falling over. My son has spent a lot of time in our king size bed, I don’t think a single would cut it. The other thing is: sleepovers! Yes the double bed may take up more space initially, but it means your child can share the bed with one of his friends or a cousin. No more having to buy futons or sleeping bags. Never mind storing these things. It is much better than getting them to snuggle down in the wardrobe.

Long-Lasting

Sometimes I feel like nothing grows faster than children. You blink and then they are half your size. Blink again and then they are taller than you. Yes, children grow at an alarming rate. It is better to head off growth spurts, and save all of that time researching and buying, when the piece of furniture will probably just be too small quickly and need replaced. Buying a double bed for your child means it will last, and it will save you money too. Win win. They can sleep in it until they are teenagers, and, hopefully, until it is time to move out. Cry.

All Grown-Up

Another good reason to get a child a double bed is because it will make them feel like a grown up. Yes, it is a luxury, but one that will pay off in spades. It is always a good idea to make a child feel like a mini adult. Another good idea is to get them involved with choosing the bed. Children love to feel involved and it is a grown-up purchase. Another possible benefit is that it might make them excited about going to bed in their brand new bed that they picked themselves.  Possibly a long shot, but we can live in hope.

 

Diary of a Freelance Working Mother: Park Life

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A term time break. The summer holidays. This used to mean something when I was in school, but since my son is still in toddlerhood it does not hold the same excitement. I am not saying it has no effect on my life: the toddler groups close or become less frequent. When they are open they are busier than ever. It seems like everyone, apart from our family, has taken August off and is having a wonderful time sunning themselves in an exotic location. Cry. But what really changes during term breaks is that I end up going to the park with my little one. Parks that are busier than ever.

Usually my little one and I are too busy to go to the park. His social life is packed with different events and lessons. From Monkey Music to his toddler groups. But toddlers need to learn, get fresh air, and burn off their energy. Fun for toddlers, but not always for the mama. I usually love taking my son on the swing, and watching him do the assault course. There are a lot of parks near where we live in South-West London, and they all have something different to offer. But the real interesting thing is the people that each park attracts. Some are easy-going with friendly toddlers, others are full of aggressive children and mothers who do not care. General piece of advice to them: it is called parenting, not let-them-do-whatever-they-want-ing. I reckon I could write a book just on the politics of park life.

I recently had a lovely conversation with a little girl about Star Wars, had an aggressive 10-year-old call my two-year-old a ‘s**t f**k’ because he wanted to go on the bus, and strike up a conversation with a friendly Irish mother whose sons toy my son kept trying to steal. It went well until she told me that 5-year-olds are harder work than two-year-olds and then I just wanted to start drinking, everyday.

I have had many great conversations with other mothers and their children. Not every experience has been great however. Where there is all of life that will not happen. Recently it started to rain just as I took my son to the park, we waited under a tree until it passed. Another mother came to the fence near us and started saying how she had lost her phone to a friend, and had left it on the fence. She gave me the eye and I gave the eye back, irritated. She then went all over the park looking for her phone. A while later she came up to me and asked ‘if I had seen a phone’. I told her, no. The rain passed and I took my son into the park for some fun. I looked over at one point to see the mean mother, who had previously been bitching about me to all of her friends, On Her Phone. No apology. Difficult mothers cannot be entirely avoided. Neither can the competitive ones. One mother kept telling me my son was 3 ‘because he looks 3’ It is hard to argue with that kind of logic.

Negative moments aside I now get why I saw so many mother in parks before I become a mother. Some looked exhausted and spaced out, others were on their phones, and some looked happy as they watched their child play. The park allows parents to socialise while the children burn off energy. On a tough day, it takes some of those hours away when they feel endless. So I might see you at the park, but I will make sure it is a friendly one. Feel free to strike up a conversation.

 

The People At Number 9 By Felicity Everett Now Out In Paperback

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One of Frosts favourite books of the year is now out in paperback. You can read our review of The People At Number 9 here. We recommend you get your hands on a copy.

Meet the new neighbours. Whose side are you on?

Have you met the People at Number 9?

Sara and Neil have new neighbours in their street. Glamorous and chaotic, Gav and Lou make Sara’s life seem dull. As the two couples become friends, sharing suppers, red wine and childcare, it seems a perfect couples-match. But the more Sara sees of Gav and Lou, the more she longs to change her own life. But those changes will come at a price.

 

Felicity Everett grew up in Manchester and studied English Literature at Sussex University. She worked in children’s publishing in London, whilst raising a family and is the author of more than twenty works of children’s fiction and non-fiction. After a short career break, Felicity returned to writing full-time and in 2011 published her debut novel, The Story of Us, a funny and touching account of the friendships forged between five women at University in the 1980s. Her second novel, The People at Number 9, published in April 2017, is a dark satire on sex, envy and betrayal in the suburbs. Felicity has recently returned from a few years living in Melbourne, with her husband and now lives in Gloucestershire. Her new work in progress is a gothic tale of marriage and mental instability set in the dark heart of the countryside. You can follow Felicity @ittymay and on Facebook, Felicity Everett – Author.

The People at Number 9 is available here.