The Books That Changed me by Alex Bannard

alex yoga

I began my journey into mindfulness around 8 year’s ago amidst a battle with mental illness. 10 minutes of mindfulness by Goldie Hawn was my first insight into mindfulness & a wonderful reflection on parenting & engaging with our children.

It changed the way I parent & has shaped that experience for us all for the better. Flicking through it again to write this piece I am staggered by the simple wisdom in its pages & the great ideas that help us to encourage our kids to let their light shine…it makes me want to delve right back into it again! 

Some of the best, most honest, funny & engaging books written about mental health & mindfulness have been written, in my humble opinion, by Ruby Wax. Her brilliance, wit & searing honesty make each of her books a page turning delight. 

Finding a favourite is tough but possibly because I am fascinated by the geeky neuroscience behind mindfulness & spirituality, How to be Human pips the others to the post. In this book, Ruby chats through a variety of topics close to the heart of any full bloodied human with a neuroscientist, Ashish Ranpura & Buddhist monk, Gelong Thubten with her trademark frankness & humour. It was so good I went to see them perform on stage too, which was unforgettable. 

When we were living in Bangkok, a dear friend & spiritual guru introduced me to Gabby Bernstein’s The Universe has your Back. So began a mini obsession: I love Gabby’s work. This book introduced me to the idea that our thoughts & energy create our reality amidst the comfort of knowing the universe has our back. 

It taps into the idea of manifesting & law of attraction; the joy & flow that abound once we begin to dance in union with the energy of the universe. And it works. I ‘manifested’ a wonderful first home & fantastic school for myself & my kids when we returned to the UK soon after reading this book, within 2 weeks of making the decision. Having lived overseas for 12 years I have never seen anyone orchestrate a move so quickly & I put it all down to the universe having our back!

The Quantum & the Lotus by Matthieu Ricard & Trinh Xuan Thuan is an exploration of the overlap between quantum physics & spirituality, which feeds right into 2 of my passions. It’s not an easy read, but it’s remarkable & fascinating.

Finally, I recently finished my first ever book on Audible: Gabby Bernstein’s latest offering, I am the Guru.  The 6 lessons described are beautiful in their simplicity & ease of application. I had never ‘done’ Audible before. I love an actual book: the cover, turning over the page corners, the smell of it. But this book isn’t out in print yet & it was the only way to access it. What a revelation! I binge-listened to it one weekend, revisiting each chapter several times afterwards. And now I’m a convert, it’s revolutionised my reading experience for the better. 

Alex coaches yoga & mindfulness in person & online to individuals, groups, in schools & in businesses. She can be contacted at alex@myananda.co.uk or via her website www.myananda.co.uk 

 

How To Pass Your Driving Test. Frost’s Editor Learns How To Drive

how to pass your driving test, pass your driving test, pass first time, nerves, tips, advice, how to pass driving test first timeIt is embarrassing how long it took me to get my driving licence. Not because I kept failing my test, but because it took me ten (yes, really!) years to take it. To some degree this wasn’t my fault. I got my provisional licence when I was 17. I immediately started taking lessons in Scotland where I lived. I was confident in my driving but kept hearing the same thing, ‘You need more lessons.’ I was desperate to do my test and dumped my driving instructor. I got another one who was worse. He would break wind in the car. If you think junctions are hard then try to do them while holding your breathe!

Instructor number three was a woman. She seemed to drift away while I was driving and, like number one, would keep saying I needed more lessons. I asked what was wrong with my driving and also like number one, she could not answer. I was annoyed.

In the meantime I passed my theory test, first time, with the highest score the test centre said they had ever had. I finally made my driving instructor book a test. And then I got an acting job in London. In fact, I kept getting acting jobs and auditions. I would buy blocks of lessons and then get a job. I realised that I had to move. The traveling and costs were too much. I moved to London and then getting my drivers licence became something on my to do list that never actually got done. Until this year.

This kind of procrastination is not like me but after a lot of thought I know why: I hate tests. I am confident in my ability to do things but I don’t like it when people test me. Ten years ago I was raring to go, but the whole test phobia had gotten worse with age. I had to control this to progress. I had built the test up to more than it was. As the years crept by and I headed into my twenties I felt like the oldest non-driver in the world. Everybody else seemed to be able to do this essential life skill, why not me? Then I started to lose jobs. A lead role in a BBC TV show, big commercials and countless films. I had to do something about it.

I started taking lessons again in 2012. In fact I had one lesson in 2010 and one lesson in 2011. In 2012 I started looking for an instructor. The guy from the AA Driving School had been giving lessons since 7am. I had my lesson with him at 7pm. I was driving in the dark after a long break. I had to have my wits about me, I lived in Ealing at the time and Southall was my nearest driving test centre. Southall is notoriously hard to pass your test at. Their pass rate is around 40%. I had a friend who had taken three goes there to pass her test. There were horror stories. Driving in Southall during that lesson, with a driving instructor who was pretty much asleep, was a learning curve. I decided not to have any more lessons with him. He was obviously overworked.

Next up was BSM. They offered an instructor who had not taken all of her tests yet for only £20 an hour. Bargain! I thought. As I said, I was confident in my driving ability, I just needed practice and the nerve to take the test. I paid for a block of ten lessons at £200. This turned out to be a big mistake. She arrived and I got in the car and I felt a presence behind me. I turned around and there was a woman staring at me. ‘Oh, this is my cleaner. You don’t mind if she comes along, do you?’ Shocked and thrown I mumbled ‘no’. I immediately was annoyed to myself. I have always been too polite. Something I am still working on. The cleaner did not seem to like my driving, Tutting every time I did something wrong. Which was often as the instructor and the cleaner talked to each other in a different language the entire time. On other lessons, she spent the entire time on her phone. One entire lesson was bay parking, something that the Southall driving test does not include.

I took lessons with Red, the instructor kept trying to sell me other things and we didn’t gel. I then took lessons with an independent driving instructor. I won’t mention her name here but I regret every lesson I ever took with her. She would yell and get angry, tell me about pupils who had blown their top and gotten angry with her. She would then dump them,not realising it was her that was pushing them too far. Passing a church she mentioned that they should send their prayers our way. I was beyond offended. My driving got worse under her and she kept putting me off taking my test. One day at a roundabout in Southall I couldn’t take anymore. I turned the ignition off as angry cars overtook. She yelled at me. I yelled back. We never had another lesson and she sent me a long, bitchy email about my ‘f**k it’ attitude. Self awareness obviously being too hard to grasp. She also said I would never pass my test.

By this time I had had enough but I would not quit. As I edged into my late twenties I started to worry about being 30 and without a drivers licence. I would not have it. I got on the internet and madly researched. I would take an intensive course. And I would pass.

The theory test only lasts two years and I had already taken it twice, passing first time with high scores each time, it was about to run out again due to my procrastination. I booked an intensive course. It was the best thing I ever did. I actually did not pass first time. the nerves got to me. I was physically shaking from head to toe. I only got three minors but was so nervous that when the examiner said ‘turn right’ I immediately did so, onto a two way side street.

I decided to not let the nerves, or the pressure, both financial and social, get to me. I bought some Bach Rescue Remedy, ate a banana, bought The Girls’ Guide to Losing Your L-plates: How to Pass Your Driving Test and focused. I used positive visualisation to imagine myself driving, on my own, down a country road. ‘You’re a good driver Catherine,’ My instructor said. ‘It is just a test, why be nervous?’ I put it into prescriptive. I told myself that the only person I had to pass for was myself. And I did it. With only four minors.

To this day my driving licence is one of my favourite things. Every time I look at it I know that anything is possible with hard work, perseverance and a positive attitude. The fact it was so hard to get just makes it even more amazing. I spent thousands of pounds but I finally feel like a grown up.

How To Pass Your Driving Test (From someone who has done it)

Take an intensive course. They are easier and you won’t get an instructor stringing you along for more money.

Choose an instructor that you get along with. Don’t give money to anyone who shouts or bullies.

Study. Read the The Official DSA Theory Test Book and highway code again. Remember the rules of the road.

If you get nervous try Bach Rescue Remedy. It worked for me.

Ask friends and family for their stories and advice.

Don’t tell anyone when you actually do your test. You don’t need the extra pressure.

Try and get a family member or friend to take you out. I did not have this and it cost me quite a bit of money as I could only practice in an instructors car.

Your theory test runs out after two years. Take it just before you take the practical, It will help having the knowledge in your head too.

For Girls, The Girls’ Guide to Losing Your L-plates: How to Pass Your Driving Test is an excellent book. It really helped me pass and also has some driving tips for when you do pass.

For Boys; Pass Your Practical Driving Test: Discover what your examiner is looking for and save the expense and heartache of failing is a good book.

Relax, if you fail you can do it again. It is not the end of the world.

Don’t over think it. Just be aware. Indicate even if other cars don’t. Just because someone has a licence doesn’t mean they are a good driver.

Always remember your checks. Look all around during maneuvers and at junctions.

Know what the DSA are looking for and know why people fail.

Good luck!

 

We Are StrongFirst

FOR THE RELENTLESS PURSUIT OF EXCELLENCE

 

So as i write this, I am sitting on the floor in a sweltering room.

No matter what I do I just can’t seem to cool down, ye I could go outside but isn’t that where the sun is?

 

It doesn’t matter, I just needed to come up with an intro.

But here is what I wanted to write about…..WHAT AN AMAZING MONTH SO FAR.

 

Summer arrived, Andy Murry wins Wimbledon, The Lions CRUSH Australia in the final match for the series, Josh completes his first PARAS’10 event (a 10 mile speed march carrying 37lbs) and StrongFirst hold their first UK kettlebell certification.

 

Achievements made by all, well not for StrongFirst, no the instructors didn’t do much except show the skills needed and passion that all us SFG instructors have, no the achievement was made by the 40 plus candidates that didn’t just turn up for the 3 days of not just tuition and guidance but the hard….and i mean HARD 3 days work and up to 12 months prep.

 

It has been known for candidates to prep for up to a year before taking the cert and there is good reason to do so.

This is the only kettlebell certification where you CAN FAIL, or as we call it referral.

But what I mean is if you cannot complete the strength test, or the technique test or the horrific snatch test (100 kettlebell snatches in 5 mins-weight based on you’re body weight) you get “refured” therefore until you complete it you are NOT able to call yourself a StrongFirst certified instructor, a badge of honor. A proud family.

 

Its true that this weekend not everyone passed, they are referred and will have to meet the requirements before receiving their certificates and added to the StrongFirst database of instructors.

 

People may think it’s elitist, but to me those are the people who also come up with excuses when it rains or it’s cold. when they have a sore shoulder or no one to train with.

And who would much rather do a dumbass 6-8 hour kettlebell instructors course “at times having never touched one before” and then going to teach someone.

 

In StrongFirst there is a saying, we train you to be at a level where we are happy for you to teach our mothers. Not mother in-laws but mothers.

 

Now who would you want to teach you’re mother not only how to lose some weight, tone up a  bit, maybe improve flexibility or gain the strength to walk upright, to pick up an object or ever roll out of bed because to some people that in it’s self is an achievement and to us its why we dedicate our time and bodies to prepare ourselves for this event.

 

PRACTICE WHAT WE PREACH, if you’re personal trainer cannot do the snatch test yet tells you to run, press and swing the bell what the hell are they doing. How can they aim to help you if they will not aim to better themselves.

In the Paras we call this JACK, they are being Jack on themselves and they are being Jack on you.

 

This weekend NO ONE was Jack, the fear of not passing kicked Jack’s ass out the building. Honestly Jack would have been scarred to show his face.

Not only did the candidates take on bored a lot of info but there was workouts, oh god there was workouts.

It was beautiful, loud music playing exciting the body and emotions as they swung, pressed, squated and snatched iron.

Sweat was dripping and smiles showing.

 

Remember these people are not elite, we are not elitist. They come from all works of life and are in all different sizes and ages.

For example one of my students was a 55plus year old gent and yes he had to do the same as everyone else…….and he did, because he worked for it.

 

We have barriers but no blockades.

Not only do you have the right to do what you want but also the ability to do so. Ye it may be a struggle for some and others take longer but what is the point of doing things if they are too easy.

 

At the end of the final day we hold the Grad Workout which was led by myself and another instructor.

Now with over 40 people working together after such a great accomplishment I got a little excited and the music drove me hard, i drove the candidates and in return I made my work out myself harder.

 

As the group did more I made myself do even more, so much that at the end a newly qualified StrongFirst kettlebell instructor approached me and said “goddam what is the matter with you, how did you find the endurance to do almost every set when you where meant to work in pairs”. My response was simple

 

Because I am StrongFisrt

 

 

Ladies and Gents, we can all be StrongFirst if you want it. In everyday life. It Is up to you.

 

FOR THE RELENTLESS PURSUIT OF EXCELLENCE

 

To view photos of the fist UK StrongFirst kettlebell certification please visit and like our facebook group www.facebook.com/KettlebellStrength

 

website www.kettlebellstrength.co.uk

twitter @KB_strength

 

Seb Morgan

SFG

Primal Move

774446_10153076185305227_108647163_o