Female Superheroes… Why has Hollywood gotten it wrong??

The geek in me wants to write 100,000 and the human in me is not going to allow it… well, we’ll see!

OK, what am I talking about and where is the evidence? Sometimes the lack of evidence IS the evidence! For instance, how many superheroes can you name and how many of those are female? If you know a few… how many of those have had a film role? Now share you list with someone other than your best friend and social circle and see if they have heard of any of the people you’re talking about and if they have seen those films!

Let’s see…  we have Red Sonja… Yes, she is a female comic character, so all those from the 80’s, you can dust of your VHS and claim that one for the ladies! You can have Wonder Woman too… although the film was only a TV film, which sort of counts… Supergirl, although, it is sometimes painful to recollect that movie. Batgirl… short lived, as it was and bad as a franchise, let alone a film. Invisible Woman… yes, forgetting that movie too. And of late, we have Black Widow! Now, there are few I have left out because I would need most of the article to explain the what’s and where and trust me, we have a lot to discuss! OK then… just a quick overlay.

Brigitte Nielsen

Brigitte Nielsen

Alicia Silverstone

Alicia Silverstone

Helen Slater

Helen Slater

X-men has so many swap overs that you have to know your characters to know if they are good, or bad. Storm was a thief, a princess, leader of an underground mutant outcasts and if I brought you up-to-date, there would be a geek uberfest in whether she is good, bad, or just a fence sitter, so just on that character alone, you can imagine if I began to discuss the others that would be where I lose those who actually wanted to know why I am pointing a finger.

So, how did we get to finally have the point where Marvel and DC have a major hold in Hollywood productions and kids actually know what they are all talking about when you mention current super heroes and the many characters that have been around as early as the 1940’s, so it is not a modern thing, by any means.

I think the best way to describe it is that the characters have been diluted! Many nuances, flaws, personalities are there for what Hollywood thinks we want, rather than going with a tried and tested version. It’s like they could not even be bothered to do the homework and make the character an actual iconic figure, except we get one that has been… well, watered down!

So let’s take an example… Gal Gadot is due to play Wonder Woman (which has seemingly been moved to 2016) and the amount of brouhaha that her appointment to the role brought! Believe it, or not, the whole thing was misinterpreted from comic to actress and from the fans. The character is an Amazonian from Themyscira and she is a warrior that is far more advanced than their island suggests. Her persona is dour, yet adaptive to many situation and has never seen a man before their intrusion and always taught never to trust them, so she is naturally brash! Her body type is well toned and a well honed fighter in weapons, hand-to-hand combat and battlefield strategy. Her presence is imposing and can move a room to silence without saying a word. Amazing acrobatic skills, horse riding, aircraft flying and adaptive to ones she has never flown before.

Wonder Woman/Gal Gadot

Wonder Woman/Gal Gadot

Now whilst Hollywood can do most things to make her character stand out and be nearly all the thing on paper… The fans knew that the moment they chose someone of Gadot’s stature, Hollywood will definitely, almost certainly and royally mess it up! The stats are wrong for the body type in height and stature, but given the time now added onto the movie it will be good enough for the build and maybe the other actors will be short enough to give the illusion of her height.

Also the uproar from the fans made Gadot retort and now there is already friction between the die hards and the actress. Granted, she is expected to stand her ground, but the problem is that her speech is not to those for whom decades of collecting and admiring Wonder Woman is their life and passion, but for those that don’t exist! By that I mean that the fans have more knowledge on Wonder Woman than Gadot had given them credit and so it was badly received and likely to have an impact on those that may gone to see it, but will dig their heels and not even entertain it. Trust me; I had a discussion lasting all day on this very subject when it broke!

It doesn’t look good, already we have the future foreboding… how about a present one? Black Widow! Many fans were so excited, that I cannot put into “Safe For Work” terms how much so. However, whilst Scarlett Johansson did the best with what they gave her, she had to up it for Avengers, as they took note of a huge backlash at tepid version on Ironman 2 and made her more character savvy. All they have to do now is give her the right weapons and it will be a complete character. Black Widow is now a character accepted by the masses and her memorabilia is flying off the shelves, which make money for the studios (Hence why they were snapped up by Disney) and more pot to play with for the next film.

Scarlett Johansson

Scarlett Johansson

Now one from the past, but we don’t need to look too far back… Invisible Woman should be as far as we need travel. Jessica Alba was not the obvious choice, but a name all men and women would want to see! When the Fantastic Four finally made it on to our screens it was very lukewarm… and that is no pun intended. As aggressive as Sue Storm (Invisible Woman’s name) is, she loves and adores Reed (her husband-to-be) and so their relationship is not really all that believable. In actuality, her hidden frustrations were not what should activate the power, but give her more believable control over it! Truth is, is that when her raw power is compared to the others, she is the strongest! Even before she learned what to do. Her character was very uneven and bring her into the Hollywood limelight was probably more frightening than the character portrayed in the film! So, when the sequel came out many had hoped for a better Woman, but it was as though they thought people would be duped twice and when people found out, they just didn’t go to see it, or pay for the DVD! Not Jessica’s fault, as the whole film was bad and Chris Evans went on to be Captain America without even as much as a blemish from his previous role.

Jessica Alba

Jessica Alba

We get to the part where I ask, “Why have we got so little in the way of female superheroes”? If you knew how many powerful and amazing characters they have to choose from, it would be an argument to say they are spoilt for choice! I personally think that considering the male dominance, they truly lack the testes to get a movie out there! It is not hard, sorry about that, but it for some reason we are still driven by egocentric rich alphas that have no clue what really goes on outside their little bubble. A wealth of life and diversity has more than enough room for a female superhero role model.

By Miku Nyan aka Protokitty

By Miku Nyan aka Protokitty

However, they made 3 different versions of Hulk to get to the current one… but how many people know the Hulk has a cousin that is also infected with his blood, but is far sassier and more of a character than her screaming & destructive elder cousin? Jennifer Walters and she is an attorney with a diminutive stature (in human form) and would easily be considered the girl next door! She stays smart and is far more outgoing in her Hulk form, but doesn’t shy away from a fight. She is far more interesting as a character then Bruce Banner, but she has never even made it to be a consideration of female superheroes. I digress, there are female superheroes that are not just a distaff and are more than Hollywood has even bothered to entertain.

I could go on and on with example after example and all are heroes and all are worth their merit, but it seems Black Widow would be flying the flag for 21st century female superheroes and you will have to wait a couple more years for Wonder Woman.

Jennifer Lawrence Stuns On Total Film Cover

Jennifer Lawrence looks amazing on the cover of Total Film as Mystique in X-Men: Days Of Future Past.

Once again directed by Bryan Singer and co-starring Michael Fassbender, James McAvoy and Hugh Jackman, X-Men: Days Of Future Past will open in the UK on 22 May 2014.

Jennifer-Lawrence

Fanboy letters. To Zack Snyder

Dear Zack

I cannot express in words how much you mean to me. I am a comic book fan (geek) and forever will be. My love for them almost outweighs my love for Films. But when the two come together to make sweet, tender, passionate love then my experience is so joyful that I cannot contain my adoration for those who create the genius and sheer poetry of such masterpieces.  As I sit here listening to the dulcet tones of Van Morrison telling me how fantabulous the night is all I can think of is how I wish I can watch Watchmen once again. While I don’t want to make Love to you Zack, let’s face it you’re no Ben Affleck, I do want to make creative love to your genius. Some people, like Tim Burton, don’t respect the source material when they make comic book movies but you? You make my geeky dreams come true and take panels from the page and make them come to life. I’ve had a crush on you ever since 300. Your adaptation of the Frank Miller novel I love so much almost made me cry. Almost – I’m still a dude. But as sweeping and grand as 300 is my full on man crush on your creativity and my deep burning passion for your vision can be put down to Watchmen.

Sure you have your critics. Like you took the Giant Squid and didn’t use it. Hey sshh don’t listen to them they just don’t understand that after Jon Peters and the giant Spider idea for Superman Lives that would have been stupid. You don’t have to explain why people are saying the movie tanked in America in its second weekend at the box office. No. You don’t have to explain to people why it’s not doing the expected business. True art doesn’t have to justify itself Zack.  Zack just remember you made an amazing film and that I think you’re great. You’re a huge big time director now!

But…….I have something to tell you. There’s someone else. I know I said we’d be together forever but as much as I love Watchmen. As much as I love 300. As much as there awesomeness makes me a happy man Zack I need to confess that you are merely a cinematic fling. A graphic affair if you will. I’m sorry that you can never be my own true love.  That will always be Bryan Singer. I will always love X-Men 2 more than any other comic book film ever made. Oh sure it’s not as amazingly accurate as your films. It doesn’t have bone crunching action like your films or have trailer lines that make me want to wet myself in geeky excitement at their mere mention. After all THIS IS SPARTA!

But X-Men 2 will forever be me one, true love.  The opening scene will always be the moment my heart was stolen by Bryan Singer. Sure it’s not perfect but what relationship is? I can even forgive him Superman Returns for the sheer fantabulous nature of the opening to X-Men 2. The music. Nightcrawler. The action. The drama. I’m sorry but the times may be a changing but not in my world of comic book love. X-Men 2 will forever be my love. Watchmen will forever be my lust.

Can’t you be happy with second place in my heart? I love you more than Nolan! I do I really do! Nolan could never steel my heart like you Zack. The way you direct makes me want you to direct me. Well not really but it makes me want to direct so that works right? The Dark Knight makes me happy. It’s great. But you make me really happy. Just not X-Men 2 happy! Zack believe me when I say I never meant to hurt you. My love for you is firm and true. But when it’s all said and done and the curtain falls and the credits role all I am left with is the faint and subtle sense that I will forever love Singer more.

Zack you rock. You kick so many other comic directors’ ass.  But you will forever live in the shadow of my love for Bryan Singer. Sorry. You may shout out Love me more than Singer but I’ll whisper…..no

In sheer awe

The Fan Boy
( Written by Richard Wright )