WHY HOMOPHOBIA HAS A STRONGHOLD IN SPORT

By David Ledain, the latest addition to the Frost magazine team, writing on LGBT issues

Sport is a phenomenon which can both bond and divide in equal measure. Tribal instincts and loyalties are challenged and revered, and in football especially, young men can be empowered and at the same time hidden from view.

Homophobia and anti-gay violence seems to crystalize young males in football tribes and gangs. It proves their heterosexuality and obliterates any secret homosexual desires of their own they may have. Targeting gay men is not seen by the perpetrators as hatred towards the individuals, but rather as an extreme expression of society’s expectations of them – that they are conducting themselves within what they have learned as acceptable male behaviour. They are in part driven by fear. The potential of any young man, regardless of his sexual orientation, to be labelled as ‘gay’ and weak, and ostracised from his family and the surrogate families of his football tribe, schoolfriends, work colleagues or neighbours, for being or unknowingly presenting anything other than the heteronormative, is so damning, even dangerous, that men are pressurised into characterising themselves to a very narrow set of male gender stereotypes. Owen Jones, the columnist, author and social activist, concurs, saying that the majority of homophobic abuse is ironically directed at straight males, and that almost all men will have been subjected to some sort of malicious homo-name-calling in their lives and been told in no uncertain terms what sort of a man they should be.

Photograph by kind permission of Altrincham FC

‘You grow up hearing people use what you are as the ultimate derogatory insult,’ Jones says. ‘Society tells you you should be heterosexual. It’s even subtler than that. There’s that awful patronising thing when people say, “Oh, I never would have guessed that you’re gay”, and you’re left feeling almost flattered that your leprosy isn’t publicly obvious.’

The potency of the idealised masculine heteronormative which captivates and imprisons young men especially, through its facade of power and place in the world, even when those same young men whose circumstances gives them no real power at all, is the derisible falsehood that is so destructive. Males who aspire to this gender stereotype, yet have no means of ever realising it due to factors out of their control, and not always economic or social, may feel their only way to make a mark in the world, to stand out in their community, is to carry out attacks on vulnerable groups, particularly, homosexuals – easy targets which they see as the antithesis of who they are and who they want to be.

Altrincham FC recently made the headlines by tackling the issue of homophobia in football by going out on pitch in a rainbow coloured kit, and in 2017 Stonewall backed the Rainbow Laces campaign to get everyone who plays sport to support LGBT equality. Cricketer, Joe Root, has also been widely applauded for his response to alleged homophobic abuse, telling the West Indies bowler, Shannon Gabriel, ‘There is nothing wrong with being gay.’

Things are slowly changing both on the pitch and in the dressing room but getting to a place where LGBT equality and anti-gay abuse from the terraces is not a topic of discussion any more is difficult to imagine because of the deep-rooted traits of the hetero-biased tribes. But if sport and particularly football continues to move towards diversity and inclusivity, one day we will get there.

You can follow David on Facebook & Twitter @Davidledain

And visit his website www.gaydad.co.uk for more information and his blog.

 

The Business of Books With Jane Cable: David Ledain

the-business-of-books-interviewswithjanecableThis week Jane Cable interviews David Ledain about why he believes he can sell more self-help than fiction and why he decided to turn his own experiences into a book. Find out more about David at www.gaydad.co.uk.

I am a gay dad and to protect those I love I write using the penname – David Ledain. I live on the south coast of England and have two sons. When I was going through the process of coming out and separating from my wife, I couldn’t find anything about other gay dads like me, so I wrote a book: Gay Dad – 10 true stories of divorced gay men with kids, living in the UK today.

How much of your working life does the business of books take up?

I write fiction as well, and the two different sides to my writing take up a lot of time, but mostly that is marketing and promoting, which some people find dreadful and they are uneasy with. I love the new challenges and surprises that meeting interesting people and talking about my work brings. The first radio interview I did was very daunting, but the presenters are there to get you to talk about your topic, not to bamboozle you as they might a politician. I do try and write something every day, even if it’s only a paragraph or two, or just go back and do some editing.

writing, publishing, writers. david ledain, jane cable

What’s your business model to earn a living from writing?

I realised quite quickly, after I had written and published my first book, that I wasn’t about to be giving up the day job to spend my precious time doing what I love, which is writing and researching, as a full-time occupation. What I also learned, having published Gay Dad, was that non-fiction, especially when it concerns true life stories, sells much better than fiction, and this got me to think about how other self-published writers might benefit from telling their own stories and personal experiences to engage more with their audience. I am currently developing this idea with two fellow self-published authors who have also found a much more receptive market in their non-fiction work than they have in their fiction.

What do you consider to be your major successes?

Gay Dad has been, and will continue to be, successful. But I measure success not only in the number of sales and royalties I make, but in the number of times I get approached by radio presenters to come on their shows, editors asking me to write pieces for their magazines, or people wanting to set-up LGBT courses and ask for my input. The greatest feeling is when guys send messages of gratitude for the support they’ve gained from reading Gay Dad and the other men’s stories, and for bringing the subject into the open and making the public more aware of what I believe, is a far more common thing than we realise.

Tell me about your latest project.

I am happiest when I’ve got many irons in the fire and lots going on. Consequently, I have just launched the Gay Dad website www.gaydad.co.uk ; I’m in the process of writing a self-help guide for independent authors to tell their personal stories; I’m writing the third novel in my fiction series and have drafted the storyline for a new series about a gay FBI agent set in the 1950’s. Lots going on, and the different income streams also means I am getting nearer to my dream of being able to make a living from doing the thing I love – writing.

Hatcham Social – About Girls | Music Review

I like About Girls. It’s a record that reminds me of the time when I first got into music, in the late 1990’s, and went to shows. It was a time when Britpop was dying and the last of the scene was coming through. The likes of the Warm Jets and Gay Dad. It’s a time that most people look back on with regret and perhaps a little bit of a snigger. Nobody’s going to describe being there in the same way they do as San Francisco in the 60’s or New York in 1977 but, d’you know what – it’s my Hacienda and I rather like it.

About Girls captures the post-Britpop sound brilliantly. It’s a better effort than their debut,You Dig The Tunnel, I’ll Hide The Soil, released in 2009 which tried to hard and had too much going on. About Girls is a less complicated and straightforward album. Less try-hard. Nobody likes a try-hard. The album works best when played as a complete album in the order it was intended. I’ve listened to this album a dozen or so times and it sounds best when you turn shuffle off on your mp3 player and play it from 1-13 with each song telling the next chapter of the story.

It begins with NY Girl, the archetypal tale of lost love, which could be Olympian-era Gene and with its driving bassline it begins with a confidence and swagger, which dissipates as the song goes on and it becomes clear this won’t end well. Nicola Tells Me is a slice of Shed Seven-esque jangly pop, Lois Lane is built entirely around a beautiful swooning bass. Little Savage appears to have borrowed heavily from the Johnny Borrell songbook but setting that aside is two and a half minutes of nice catchy hooky pop. Escape From London is that moment, committed to tape, where once in a while you need to escape the business of living in the big city and run to the hills.

About Girls isn’t just a record that’s borrowed heavily from the dying days of Britpop, it’s a record that’s the soundtrack to your emotions. Every emotion. It’s about growing up, something the band have clearly done on this record. It’s about life. It’s about love. It’s about loss. It’s about whatever emotion you want it to be, it’s got everything on here. Buy it and enjoy it and whatever you do don’t put it on shuffle!

 

About Girls is released on 2nd April 2012 by Fierce Panda Records