Top 10 Common Faults with Human Thought

When you think about it the human mind is an incredible thing. Cognition, the act or process of thinking, enables us to process immense amounts of information in the blink of an eye. Take just walking down your high street for example; you are multi-tasking walking with taking in stimuli such as sound, smell all whilst looking out for the latest offers. You may be consciously thinking about one specific thing, but you brain is processing thousands of subconscious ideas.

Unfortunately our cognition is not perfect, and there are certain judgment errors that we are prone to making, and left unchecked there are certain habits we can fall into with our thinking which can limit our success. In my own journey of change NLP played a huge part as the key statement is ‘That as you think, so you are’. It shares a lot with the field of psychology ideas that ‘Thought is linked to behaviour’.

I’m going to share with you the top ten faults. If any of these ring true for you don’t worry; they happen to everybody regardless of age, gender, education, intelligence. Some of them are well known, others not, but all of them are interesting. I am sure everyone will find that one has happened to them, (I myself have been prone to several) hopefully you recognise when they are making an error in the future.

 

10. Gambler’s Fallacy

The Gambler’s fallacy is the tendency to think that future probabilities are altered by past events, when in reality, they are not. Certain probabilities, such as getting a heads when you flip a (fair) coin, are always the same. The probability of getting a heads is 50%, it does not matter if you’ve gotten tails the last 10 flips. Thinking that the probabilities have changed is a common mistake, especially when gambling. For example, I am playing roulette. The last four spins have landed on black, it has to be red this time right? Wrong! The probability of landing on red is still 47.37% (18 red spots divided by 38 total spots). This may sound obvious, but this bias has caused many a gambler to lose money thinking the probabilities have changed.

 

9. Reactivity

Reactivity is the tendency of people to act or appear differently when they know that they are being observed. In the 1920s, a manufacturing facility commissioned a study to see if different levels of light influenced worker productivity. What they found was incredible, changing the light caused productivity to soar! Unfortunately, when the study was finished, productivity levels decreased to their regular levels. This was because the change in productivity was not due to the light levels, but to the workers being watched. This demonstrated a form of reactivity; when individuals know they are being watched, they are more likely to be motivated to change their behaviour, generally to make themselves look better. Reactivity is a serious problem in research, and has to be controlled in blind experiments (“Blind” is when individuals involved in a research study are purposely withheld information so as not to influence the outcomes).

 

 

8. Pareidolia

Pareidolia is when random images or sounds are perceived as significant. Seeing clouds in the shapes of dinosaurs, the image of Jesus on a slice of bread, or hearing messages when a record is played backward are common examples. The common element is that the stimulus is neutral, it does not have intentional meaning; the meaning is in fact the viewer’s perception and reflects as much about them as the situation. So if you are looking for something like a woman in am image you are much more likely to see just that.

 

7. Self-fulfilling Prophecy

This is perhaps the most powerful fault with human thinking. A self-fulfilling prophecy is a prediction that causes itself to become true. For example, I think my relationship with my significant other is going to fail, so I start acting differently, pulling away emotionally or I refuse to trust them because I have had negative experiences in the past and I think that every partner will cheat on me. Because of my actions, I actually cause the relationship to fail. This is a powerful tool used by so called “psychics” they may implant an idea in your mind and you eventually make it happen because you think it will.

When you start realising this it actually becomes quite shocking. There is an argument to say that Economic Recessions could be a self-fulfilling prophecy. Because a recession is 2 quarters of Gross Domestic Product (GDP) decline, you cannot know you are in a recession until you are at least 6 months into one. Unfortunately, at the first sign of decreasing GDP, the media reports a possible recession, people panic and start a chain of events that actually cause a recession.

 

6. Halo effect

The Halo effect is the tendency for an individual’s positive or negative trait to “spill over” to other areas of their personality in others’ perceptions of them. This bias happens a lot in employee performance appraisals. For example: my employee, Biff, has been late to work the past three days; I notice this and conclude that Biff is lazy and does not care about his job. There are many possible reasons why Biff was late, perhaps his car broke down, his babysitter did not show up, or there has been bad weather. The problem is, because of one negative aspect that may be out of Biff’s control, I assume that he is a bad worker.

The Physical Attractiveness Stereotype is when people assume that attractive individuals possess other socially desirable qualities, such as happiness, success and intelligence. This becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy when attractive people are given privileged treatment such as better job opportunities and higher salaries.

 

5. Group Polarisation

Sometimes called Herd Mentality or Mob Mentality, this is the tendency to adopt the opinions and follow the behaviours of the majority to feel safer and to avoid conflict. At its most common form this is none other than peer pressure. We see Herd Mentality in recent incidents such as the riots, but do you notice it at Christmas when everyone wants the latest toy or is perhaps looking at the latest fashion? Creating a must have attitude in consumers is the staple diet of Marketing execs and if they can create it even through viral exposure they will at any cost; all it takes is a group of people who think something is cool, and it catches on.

 

4. Reactance

Reactance is the urge to do the opposite of what someone wants you to do out of a need to resist a perceived attempt to constrain your freedom of choice. This is common with rebellious teenagers, but any attempt to resist authority due to perceived threats to freedom and/or choice is reactance. The individual may not have a need to do the specific behaviour, however the fact that they cannot do it makes them want to.

Reverse psychology is an attempt to influence people using reactance. Tell someone (particularly children) to do the opposite of what you really want, and they will rebel and actually end up doing what you want.

 

3. Hyperbolic Discounting

Hyperbolic discounting is the tendency for people to prefer a smaller, immediate payoff over a larger, delayed payoff. Much research has been done on decision-making, and many factors contribute to the individual decision making process. Interestingly, delay time is a big factor in choosing an alternative. Put simply, most people would choose to get £20 today instead of getting £100 one year from today. Assume that the interest rate is 9%, at this interest rate, a rational person would be indifferent to taking £91.74 now, or £100 a year from now. However, it is interesting how much less we are willing to take immediately rather than wait, would you rather have £100 a year from now, or £50 immediately? How about £40 immediately? Where do you draw the line?

There are huge connotations for a society who thinks this way. Just imagine how many people are putting off their pensions because they would rather have the money now than to start saving. Just imagine how many people are getting into debt because of quick fire loans of £1443% apr – Yes I have seen them.

My personal nickname for this is P.I.G – Personal Immediate Gratification and I don’t mind saying that it is the one that I had the most problems with. Essentially it is the ability to put off immediate gratification in favour of a longer term gain. If you read Frost regularly I’ll have more on this in the next few months

 

 

2. Escalation of Commitment

Escalation of commitment is the tendency for people to continue to support previously unsuccessful endeavours. With all the decisions people have to make, it is unavoidable that some will be unsuccessful. Of course, the logical thing to do in these instances is to change that decision or try to reverse it. However, sometimes individuals feel compelled not only to stick with their decision, but also to further invest in that decision because they have sunk costs. For example, say you use half of your life savings to start a business. After 6 months, it is evident that the business is going to be unsuccessful. The logical thing to do would be to “cut your losses” and drop the business. However, due to the sunk costs of your life savings, you feel committed to the business and invest even more money into the project hoping that the additional cash will turn the business around.

Just to be clear on this – faltering on the border of failure is not always a bad thing; many successful people I know have come close to bankruptcy many times, many relationships have bordered on the edge of breakdown and in many cases people come through stronger and more educated than before; in fact some would say failure is almost a pre-requisite to success. The key becomes knowing when to walk away and when to stay.

 

1. Placebo Effect

Number one in my book has to be the Placebo effect. This is when an ineffectual substance that is believed to have healing properties produces the desired effect. Especially common with medications, the placebo effect has been observed when individuals given a sugar pill for a real ailment reported improvement. Placebos are still very much a scientific mystery. It is theorised that placebos cause an “Expectancy Effect”, (In cases of uncertainty, expectation is what is most likely to happen) individuals expect the pills to cure their ailments, so they feel cured. However, this does not explain how the ineffectual pills actually cause a reduction in symptoms.

The term “Placebo” is used when the outcomes are considered favourable or positive, when the outcomes are negative or harmful; the term is called “Nocebo”

SPRUCE UP YOUR DATING PROFILE

Almost six million Brits are now dating online[1] but with so many people and so many profiles in the digisphere, it pays to be creative. Standing out from the virtual crowd has never been more important if you are hoping to meet a long term partner online.

“Whether you have signed up for the first time or have been online dating for several months, never under-estimate the power of your dating profile,” says Dr Gian Gonzaga, world-renowned expert in the field of compatibility and relationships for eHarmony®.

“Your online profile is a virtual window into your life, your passions, your goals and accomplishments. There’s no set formula for a ‘great profile’ as everyone’s different, but every profile should be positive and lively. Like a CV, it should show off your best points, but instead of a dry list of achievements it should be conversational in tone and full of personality.”

So, if you’re thinking of starting on the online dating journey, follow Dr Gonzaga’s ten tips to ensuring your profile gets you a first date, and lots more:

1. RELAX AND TURN OFF DISTRACTIONS

The first step is to get comfortable and relaxed and have a bit of distance from noise and distractions so you can concentrate on thinking about all your positives. Sit down on the sofa, put some music on, and start jotting down some thoughts about what makes you unique on paper, or the computer.

2. DO YOUR RESEARCH

What better way to research than reading other people’s profiles and looking at what you like about them, and what you don’t. Make sure your profile isn’t the same as others’ though. You’re unique.

3. WHAT DO YOUR FRIENDS SAY ABOUT YOU?

Everyone finds it difficult writing about themselves. It’s often easier to write about other people; so ask your close friends to describe your best qualities. Your friends can reveal a lot about your character that you may never spot.

4. STAY POSITIVE!

Avoid negative tones and always be positive about yourself. Your profile is essentially your dating CV. You wouldn’t want a future employer to read anything negative on your CV, so why would you want a potential partner to read anything that isn’t positive?

5. ADOPT A WRITER’S STYLE

Many people find poor grammar and spelling a turn off, and the best of us can make mistakes, so be careful on this point. Always write in full sentences, don’t abbreviate or use text speak. Then read your profile aloud, or ask a friend to double check it. Then put it into Word and use your computer spell check for final peace of mind.

6. UPDATE YOUR PHOTOS

Pictures are an essential part of your profile so use them to full effect. These are a few good examples:

– The Full Face Close Up: Great light, no sunglasses. You’re simply smiling!

– The Full Body: Ideally standing outside.

– The Waist Up: Sitting down and smiling.

– Your Passion: Doing something you really love – snowboarding, sailing etc.

– Your Favourite Place: Local park, the beach or garden, it’s a great conversation starter.

7. BE SPECIFIC

When you’re writing about what sums you up as a person, talk in specifics to give a full flavour of who you are. If you love travelling, say where your favourite place is and why. Anything concrete like this brings you alive to anyone reading, and improves your chances of there being some connecting points.

8. HAVE FUN!

Most people want to find someone who can make them laugh, so show people you have a sense of humour. If you can make someone laugh or someone can make you laugh, it’s a great icebreaker and could get your conversation off to a great start.

9. TWEAK AS YOU GO

Be prepared to tweak the profile as you go along, you can always come back to it and change it if you feel you didn’t quite get it right the first time. Add in your current achievements or hobbies, so if you’ve just started a photography course, then add that to your profile.

10. PUT YOURSELF IN THEIR SHOES

And finally, think about what you would think if you read your own profile. Are you interested in you? If you feel curious then you are off to a flying start.

eHarmony.co.uk helps its users to meet compatible matches through its patented Compatibility Matching System using data from its detailed Relationship Questionnaire. Unlike other dating sites, eHarmony.co.uk uses the results of the Relationship Questionnaire to match you with others who share similar characteristics, attitudes and beliefs – proven indicators of long term relationship success.

The site also provides its users with a free and in-depth Personality Profile which offers insights into who you are and how others perceive you – as well as what your needs are in a partner. Your profile, in and of itself, can be a valuable dating tool to you in your quest to find true love that lasts. The more you know about yourself, the more you will know what you need from a potential life-partner.

SILVER FOXES ARE SEXIEST: What Turns Women On

It’s official – men with grey hair are sexy.

A new study has found that over half of
women over the age of 40 prefer their man
to have greying locks like George Clooney
or Philip Schofield.

Dyed hair, however, is a big turn off, with one in three women
giving it the thumbs down. And the beard, though making
something of a comeback, still tends to rub women up the
wrong way.

The survey of 2,000 women by mature dating website
Footloose Dating aimed to discover the most, and least,
attractive physical qualities in a potential partner.
The poll reveals that for 54 per cent of women the “silver fox”
look is the number one turn-on.

Being clean shaven came second, with 22 per cent of
women preferring a smooth face to kiss, while having
“sparkling” eyes was voted third, with 15 per cent.

Other key physical qualities included well-manicured nails,
trim figure and strong – as opposed to double – chin.
A pot belly was the biggest turn-off, with 44 per cent
prepared to cut short a dinner date if greeted with a
bulging stomach.

Men with dyed hair left a further 32 per cent of women
unimpressed while almost a quarter found bushy beards or
eyebrows off-putting.

Foul breath, comb-overs and bad teeth also sent shivers
down women’s spines.

Top 10 Turn-Ons

1. Grey hair
2. Clean shaven
3. Sparkling eyes
4. Manicured nails
5. Trim figure
6. Strong chin
7. Hairy chest
8. Deep voice
9. Tall
10. Soft lips

Top 10 Turn-Offs

1. Pot belly
2. Dyed hair
3. Bushy beard or eyebrows
4. Bad breath
5. Comb-over
6. Bad teeth
7. Body odour
8. Excessive body hair
9. Tattoos
10. Thick glasses

Eleanor Selley, co-founder of www.footloosedating.co.uk,
said: “Though many men recoil at the idea of going grey,
this survey shows what I’ve believed for a long time: that
grey hair is sexy.

“It suggests maturity and dignity, a sense of being
comfortable with getting older, whereas dyed hair screams
the complete opposite. A pot belly, on the other hand, just
says ‘I don’t care about myself at all’.

“Looks aren’t everything to the mature woman –
companionship is just as important – but they do still count.
Thankfully for men, a little grooming will go a long way.”

For more information on Footloose Dating
visit www.footloosedating.co.uk

Can “Friends With Benefits” really be the start of something beautiful?

Can “Friends With Benefits” really be the start of something beautiful?

In the eponymous Hollywood film, Mila Kunis and Justin Timberlake are FWB, ‘friends with benefits’ – they like each other, they definitely fancy each other, but they’re just not ready for a romantic relationship. But off screen, can two people really have a non-committed relationship without one person getting hurt?

According to relationship scientists from eHarmony.co.uk, studies show that people who choose to become ‘friends with benefits’ are not ready for a committed long-term relationship and find that sticking with this type of casual set-up works better for them than moving it on.

This is particularly true of men. A new study (2011)[1] found that men were more likely to desire casual sex without the need for a monogamous relationship whilst women were more likely to crave a deeper emotional connection, hoping for it to develop into a full blown relationship. So, if casual fling evolves into committed relationship, how likely is it to be a happy one?

A study by Paik (2010)[2] investigated how different sexual encounters could predict relationship satisfaction. By surveying married or cohabiting couples, Paik found that relationships that began as sexual encounters, such as casual dating or non-romantic (friends with benefits), were significantly less satisfied with their relationship than couples whose first sexual encounter was in a serious committed relationship.

So relationship science says “be warned”. Whilst an intimate encounter with an old buddy may seem like a good idea at the time – and makes a great Hollywood script – in reality there could be tears later on.

Must Have / Can’t Stand: What Singletons Look For In A Partner

For those of us who watched Mel Gibson and Helen Hunt in ‘What Women Want’ and were left none the wiser by Hollywood’s take on understanding the sexes, a new survey released today should do the trick.

A study of 15,000 single British people (both men and women) by eHarmony.co.uk, the relationship site that introduced compatibility-based matching to the UK, has found that a sense of humour is the most important trait in a future partner.

The “Must Have” top four traits British singletons are seeking, according to eHarmony’s data, are:

1. Good sense of humour – 73%

2. Being affectionate – 60%

3. Loyalty – 52%

4. Good communication – 52%

But the study didn’t stop there. eHarmony.co.uk also asked the 15,000 singletons what traits they “Can’t Stand” in a potential partner. The top four were:

1. Lying – 71%

2. Cheating – 66%

3. Rudeness – 55%

4. Poor hygiene – 46%

So there we have it? What’s your must have/can’t stand?

Jennifer Aniston's boyfriend 'loves' her

Jennifer Aniston’s boyfriend has told her he loves her.

The ‘Horrible Bosses’ actress – who started dating Justin Theroux last month after first meeting him on the set of ‘Wanderlust’ last year – was accompanied by the actor to her official hand and footprint ceremony at Grauman’s Chinese Theatre, where he reportedly confessed his feelings.

An onlooker told HollywoodLife.com: “Jen and Justin were cuddled up together before she was taken away for the ceremony. They were away from the cameras and they hugged and kissed for a few seconds before Justin said, ‘Congratulations, I love you!’

“She didn’t say I love you back but she gave him a big kiss in return and then had to hurry away.”

Jennifer is likely to be thrilled by Justin’s emotional honesty, as the 42-year-old star recently insisted the key to a successful relationship is being able to talk openly with your partner.

She said: “You need to talk to each other and you have to say what you want.

“You don’t confront your man about things which you’re not happy about, you approach it in a much more constructive way. You never want to be in an adversarial situation where it’s you versus him. “All couples face those kinds of difficulties, but you’ve got to be able to talk about your problems and your needs and do it in a positive way. That’s easier said than done, of course.”

Rupert Grint Wants To Date The Queen

Rupert Grint has a crush on Queen Elizabeth.

The ‘Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows’ actor – who shot to fame aged 11 playing Ron Weasley in the movie series – admits the monarch would be one of his two ideal women, along with singer-and-actress Juliette Lewis.

Asked which two famous women he would like to date, he said: “I think it would have to be the queen. She is [pretty foxy]. I sat in front of her at her 80th birthday, where we were asked to perform in a play, so that was pretty cool.

“My second choice would be Juliette Lewis, because she’s really cool and in a band.”

One celebrity the 22-year-old star does not find attractive is former ‘Hannah Montana’ actress Miley Cyrus.

He explained: “I’ve never really gone for those Disney girls.”

Rupert has never been in a relationship for longer than a few weeks, but is currently happy to be single.

He told Britain’s Glamour magazine: “I haven’t had any very serious relationships. The longest was probably less than a month. I’ve never had a one-night stand.

“I’m not really looking for anything at the moment. I’m so busy that it’s quite hard to commit.”

While Rupert insists he isn’t looking for love, the flame-haired star admits he has received a lot of attention from girls since starring in the ‘Harry Potter’ films.

He said: “The ginger community embraced me – put it that way.

“Walking down the street, I would get a lot of ‘ginger love’. I still do.”

Jennifer Aniston got over split with Break-Up

Jennifer Aniston says shooting ‘The Break-Up’ helped her get over her divorce from Brad Pitt.

The 42-year-old actress – who split from the Hollywood heartthrob in 2005 after almost five years of marriage – appeared in the 2006 comedy about a couple in the middle of a bitter split but instead of bringing back hurtful memories, Jennifer says it helped ease the pain.

The former ‘Friends’ star – who dated co-star Vince Vaughn for over a year – said: “It was just a beautiful story about a couple breaking up. And I was slightly familiar on the topic and the issue. And I sort of honestly felt like, what a great way to sort of exercise some of that.

“I enjoyed it. It really enjoyed it. You would think otherwise, because even the producers were like, ‘I don’t know if we should ask you to do this,’ but I was like, why not? Turn the page, let’s move on.”

Following their separation, Brad began dating Angelina Jolie, with whom he now raises six children with, while Jennifer has dated a string of men including Vince, John Mayer, Paul Sculfor and Bradley Cooper.

She is now romancing actor Justin Theroux and recently admitted she was very happy with him.

Jennifer was speaking in an interview for TV show ‘Inside The Actors’ Studio’ and she also revealed how grateful she is to the sitcom ‘Friends’ – in which she played Rachel Green for 10 series – for catapulting her to superstardom.

She said: “It’s one of the greatest jobs I ever had. It gave me everything. It gave me this ridiculously blessed life and career and taught me so much, and it’s the best time I ever had.”

Recalling on it felt filming wrapped on the last episode, she added: “It was just awful. The last scene, we just wept, cried our eyes out, in front of the whole show. A couple of us stayed really late and we crawled up to the roof of stage 24 and we drank champagne and just watched the sunrise. It was really wonderful.”