Category Archives: Life & Style

Helpful books anyone? Here’s a review round-up of a few on offer: by Annie Clarke

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The Lockdown was, for many, a time of reflection, perhaps a time of change. Here at Frost Magazine we have chosen some books which might strike a chord, and offer a way forward. With Christmas on the way, perhaps  one is suitable as a gift for someone else.

From Broken to Brave by Sam Pearce

A guide which discusses recovery from trauma leading to the creation of a new way of living.

Pearce explains that she wrote From Broken to Brave to share the  profound life and business lessons learned on her journey through pain, loss and abuse to successful entrepreneurship.  In other words after  struggling to rise above a background of mental and physical abuse the author has recovered her courage and power and is channelling all that she had learned into forging a new satisfying way of living.

Pearce uses her experiences to show how one can change what seems a given path along which one stumbles and just manages to survive, to one in which you  take back control and create something better . She shares her mistakes, and finally her way forward, in her case, to a life as an entrpreneur.

A positive heartening guide, an  interesting read and a  good generally upbeat companion to have as you break free.

Available here:

Another in the same ilk: Break-up – From crisis to confidence by Claire Black

Black is  one of the UK’s leading Break-up and Divorce Coaches – who says: “It is my experience of separation and divorce that has driven me to help others going through this experience. When I look back on my experience now, I feel immensely proud of how I behaved, and how I turned things around for myself. I am here to show you that you too can do this, so that when you look back in 5 or 10 years’ time, you too can feel proud of how you handled your break-up or divorce.”

Again we have an author using her own experiences – in this case, of a  sudden break down of a marriage. Floundering about amidst the shock and distress she determined to feel the ground beneath her feet and strid on, and having done so, to create a guide n on how to move forward for those experiencing a similar situation.

This is a guide to managing your emotions, and taking back control, working out what you want from life, and planning how to achieve this new path. Sensible, and clear advice from a former solicitor,  and one of the UK’s leading Break-up and Divorce Coaches.

Available here: www.clairblackcoaching.com

Now to: Spirited by Nina Bambrey

Spirited is in essence an eight week course, or however long or short you wish it to be, in life lessons for a parent. 

Aerial artist Nina Bambrey – yes really – creates a new concept in the way we prepare for the arrival of a babe. In her book she draws on what she has learned as a circus acrobat and single mother to offer guidance which fits the lifestyle and expectations of an upcoming generation of millennial parents-to-be.

“Spirited” is designed as a workbook offering emotional guidance and practical advice for new mums and dads.

As Bambrey says: “Becoming a parent for the first time involves a shift in identity and the development of new skills and capacities. This can be a shock to those who think that their lives will carry on largely as before. I am excited about helping people find the emotional resilience and support they need to thrive in their new role.’

The author has  set out the book in chapters, which include exercises. This idea focuses the mind,  and will be a helpful aid to some. Certainly worth a read.

You can join the author’s community www.flipturn.org.uk for free resources and how to get a group or one-to-one support

Book available here

Annie Clarke’s latest novel: Christmas on the Home Front pb. pub by Arrow, will be available  29th October 

 

 

 

 

 

Marieke Nijkamp – My Writing Process.

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Even If We Break by Marieke Nijkamp is out now in hardback by Source Books.  What you have written, past and present.

I wrote my first book—or what felt like a book at a time—when I was ten or eleven. It was, effectively, fanfiction of my favourite book at the time. It certainly wasn’t a full length book, but once I started, I never looked back. I’ve written books and short stories ever since! 

My first published novel was a contemporary YA called This Is Where It Ends, a story about a school shooting. It takes place over the course of fifty-four minutes and follows four teens who all have a reason to fear the boy with the gun. I followed it up with Before I Let Go, a YA murder mystery set in a creepy Alaskan town full of secrets, where one girl is trying to uncover the truth behind her best friend’s death. And now Even If We Break, a geeky YA thriller, but more on that later!

I also write comics and graphic novels, most recently The Oracle Code (with art by Manuel Preitano), a DC graphic novel about a young Barbara Gordon who has to solve the mysteries of a spooky Arkham mansion, all while adjusting to life in a wheelchair. And currently ongoing, Goosebumps: Secrets of the Swamp (with art by Yasmin Flores Montanez), about three girls, one swamp, and a whole lot of werewolves.

And just to complete the line-up, I also write short stories for MG and YA anthologies, and had the distinct pleasure of editing the anthology Unbroken: 13 Stories Starring Disabled Teens.

•            What you are promoting now?

My most recent YA, Even If We Break is a cabin-in-the-woods thriller about five friends who plan to spend the weekend together to play the RPG that brought them together one last time. But their friendship has grown strained, there are secrets between them, and this is where the game turns deadly. Even If We Break is geeky, terrifying, and at its core a story about friendships and growing up.

•            A bit about your process of writing.

I’m a fulltime writer, and I generally write every weekday. Regular office hours, with the evenings for administration, email, interview questions… and occasionally some gaming! I try to be sensible about keeping my weekends a little freer, because work-life balance is important too.

•            Do you plan or just write?

Oh no, I plan, in detail! I’ve plotted books with spreadsheets and flashcards and entire character profiles. These days, I usually create a story bible in advance and a full outline with scene and character beats. It’s quite a bit of work beforehand, but I love it. If gives me a feel for the shape of the story and what needs to happen when. Even if some details end up changing between the outline and the story—or the balance between chapters changes just so.

•            What about word count?

A rough idea of word count is absolutely part of the planning, but that also very much depends on what the story needs!

•            How do you do your structure?

Chapter-by-chapter, question-by-question. 

•            What do you find hard about writing?

Writing is incredibly personal, and that’s terrifying sometimes. Whether it’s exploring parts of myself in characters or staying vulnerable to approach the emotional truth of a story, writing can be highly intimidating. 

It isn’t easy, but then again, it doesn’t have to be.

•            What do you love about writing?

I love stories. I love exploring new worlds. I love taking story threads and weaving them into narrative. Above all else, I love how stories shape us and how we can shape stories. I absolutely believe storytelling is what makes us human. 

Even If We Break by Marieke Nijkamp is out now in hardback by Source Books.

 

The surprising Scandinavian approaches to child-rearing by Alex Dahl

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alex dahl, author, writer, childrearing, playdate‘Playdate’ by Alex Dahl is out now. Published by Head of Zeus and has been made into an excellent TV series called, The Stolen Girl.

 In the Scandinavian countries, children are raised quite differently than in the UK and most of the rest of the world, where fear culture feels more prevalent- fear of strangers, accidents, legal action, bad weather- the list goes on. The Scandi approach is rather less fussy and children are given an almost baffling level of freedom. They are expected to get to and from school alone, often from the age of six, sometimes walking a considerable distance, come rain or shine (or more likely, blizzards.) In the winter it is pitch-black dark when they leave home. 

When I was a child growing up in Norway, my mother’s policy was- spend most of your time outdoors, and if there’s a problem- fix it. I had a pocket full of band-aids and a bus pass, plus a few tried-and-tested recipes for afternoon snacks.

As an adult, and a domestic-noir/psychological thriller writer, I draw inspiration from the Scandinavian countries’ laissez-faire attitude, and will gladly admit that it’s rather convenient that certain plotlines, which may seem unlikely to happen in the UK are perfectly feasible in Norway. Like being asked to take a little boy home on a stormy evening, whose parents have failed to turn up- the very premise for my debut thriller, The Boy at the Door. It’s happened to me, more than once, and I’ve also turned up to pick up my kids from somewhere, only to be told that they’ve already been collected by ‘so-and-so’s dad’ or random uncle, whom I’ve never met. Or like sending your child on a sleepover when you’ve only briefly met the parents once, a decision that has disastrous consequences in my new thriller, Playdate.

I ended up doing some involuntary research when my own daughter went briefly missing during the edits of Playdate. I had recently returned to Norway and was adjusting to the Scandinavian style of parenting after a stint in London. I allowed my then nine-year-old daughter to take a bus alone home with a friend to the friend’s house after school. I was in my office, working on the book, when the mother of the friend called, several hours later. She asked whether the girls had gone to ours. Floored by panic, I explained they had definitely gone to theirs, and she said- well, they can’t have as the alarm was activated and the dog shut away in one room, and the first thing the girls would do when they get home is deactivate the alarm and let the dog out. 

The other mother immediately started to comb the neighborhood for them while I rushed over. We were about to phone the police, when she went into a local shop to ask whether the girls had been in, and another customer overheard, saying he’d seen two little girls in the nearby forest, trying to free a ride-on pink Barbie truck from thick mud. The girls had refused offers of help, having been drilled on the dangers of strangers… I got my girl home, but had never known such fear, and I went back over Playdate and infused it into the mother of the missing girl.

Playdate by Alex Dahl is available here. 

A Death in the Medina – read it, be transported to the Medina, chase the red herrings, enjoy: review by Annie Clarke

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Sometimes I have the real pleasure of reviewing a novel I would have bought myself. Not often it has to be said, and but for life, Covid and work I would have got to this sooner. (I have a pile of books to review)

What a treat, Hot to Trot, M C Beaton’s latest and A Death in the Medina – one after the other:

A Death in the Medina by James Von Leyden is set in Marrakech, in the stifling heat of August at the start of Ramadan. A heat which exceeds anything in living memory. Most foreigners head for the hills, or preferably the Arctic to cool down. One who remains is an impossible woman, or so I thought, who owns a riad (a traditional house built around a courtyard, and which is a form of hotel) She has a French boyfriend who is an architect. There is an English girl who has lost her bag, passport etc. All these pawns cross the path of 24 year old local detective Karim Belkacem, who of course is fasting. Who has a sister’s wedding to pay for. Who takes a job as a night watchman. So not only is he not eating or drinking during the intense sleep, but neither is he sleeping.

A Moroccan girl is found murdered. Another detective takes the case. But Karim knows the girl and fears it is a sloppy investigation, and all the while the heat is rising. Is the murderer one of the pawns? If so, which one? Or is it none of them?

As the heat builds so does Karim’s confusion. We feel it, we put on the fan though in reality it’s cold outside. We drink water , feeling as parched as he. I can’t say my confusion rose as his did, because I seem to live a life of chaos, but oh, dear, I felt his. And who on earth is the killer?

Slowly, delicately, elegantly it comes together. A grain of sand on the body – from the desert? But it’s salty? So where has Amina been? All the time, the hotel is rising, but too quickly. All this concrete to mix…

It’s unputdownable. See how I multi-tasked so I didn’t have to stop reading.

So, turn yourself into a dog’s bed if it gives you a few more precious minutes  with James Von Leyden in Marrakech. Read, learn, and finally understand ‘who did it.’ A Death in Medina is more than a mystery, it is an experience.

A Death in the Medina by James Von Leyden pub by Constable (who are publishing some great books) paperback

 

Booksellers Unveil Their Top Books of 2020

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Bookshops across the UK & Ireland have revealed their favourite books and authors of 2020.

This year’s shortlist includes: The Vanishing Half, by New York Time bestseller Brit Bennett; Diary of a Young Naturalist, by 16-year-old Dara McAnulty; the most hopeful book of the pandemic, Humankind by international bestselling author Rutger Bregman; The Devil and the Dark Water by 2018 Books Are My Bag Readers Awards winner Stuart Turton; South Korean sensational #MeToo bestseller Kim Jiyoung, Born 1982 by Cho Nam-joo(translated by Jamie Chang); Cinderella is Dead, a retelling of the popular fairy tale by Kalynn Bayron; and 2019-shortlistee Alice Oseman forHeartstopper Vol 3.

 

Grace Dent to host virtual Books Are My Bag Readers Awards ceremony on Tuesday 10thNovember, sponsored by National Book Tokens

·       16-year-old nature writer, two graphic novelists, previously shortlisted Alice Oseman, South Korean sensation Cho Nam-joo, and nine debut writers among booksellers’ top books of the year

·       Books on sexuality, dance, Cinderella and Greek myths make the shortlist, hand-picked by booksellers

·       Record number of books from independent publishers are shortlisted

Nine debut writers are among the 25-strong shortlists across six categories. In addition to Cho Nam-joo, Dara McAnulty and Kalynn Bayron, the other debut authors shortlisted are: Eliza Clark for her celebrated novel Boy Parts; Summer Young for her Tracy Emin-like pamphlet Sylvanian Family;Elle McNicoll for her children’s fiction book A Kind of Spark; Jean Menzies for her retellings of mythical tales Greek Myths (illustrator Katie Ponder);Kiley Reid for her Booker longlisted debut Such a Fun Age; Douglas Stuart for his heart-rending novel set in 1980s Glasgow Shuggie Bain.

 

More than half of this year’s nominated titles – spanning Fiction, Non-Fiction, Poetry, Young Adult Fiction, Children’s Fiction and Breakthrough Author – come from independent publishers, including Influx Press, Granta Books, Little Toller, Verso Books, Bad Betty Press, Nosy Crow and Knights Of. In addition, this year almost 40% of the shortlisted titles re from first-time writers.

 

The public vote opens today, ahead of Bookshop Day this weekend, to decide the winners across the six categories. The public is invited to vote for a winning title from each shortlist from Thursday 1 October until 11pm of Sunday 25 October, with the winners being announced on Tuesday 10 November at a virtual awards ceremony hosted by restaurant critic and author Grace Dent. The ceremony will be streamed at 5:30pm across the @booksaremybag YouTube, Twitter and Facebook channels.

 

The 2020 Books Are My Bag Readers Awards Shortlist, as chosen by bookshops:

 

Fiction

Boy Parts by Eliza Clark (Influx Press)

The Devil and the Dark Water by Stuart Turton (Bloomsbury)

Kim Jiyoung, Born 1982 by Cho Nam-joo (Simon & Schuster)

The Vanishing Half by Brit Bennett (Dialogue Books)

Weather by Jenny Offill (Granta Books)

 

Non-Fiction

The Dance Cure by Dr Peter Lovatt (Short Books Ltd)

Diary of a Young Naturalist by Dara McAnulty (Little Toller Books)

Humankind by Rutger Bregman (Bloomsbury)

Insurgent Empire: Anticolonial Resistance and British Dissent by Priyamvada Gopal (Verso Books)

 

Poetry

Homie by Danez Smith (Vintage)

Seagull Seagull by James K Baxter (Gecko Press)

Sylvanian Family by Summer Young (Bad Betty Press)

Tiger, Tiger Burning Bright: An Animal Poem for Every Day of the Year by Britta Teckentrup and Fiona Waters (Nosy Crow)

 

Young Adult Fiction

Children of Virtue and Vengeance by Tomi Adeyemi (Pan Macmillan)

Cinderella is Dead by Kalynn Bayron (Bloomsbury)

The Crossover: Graphic Novel by Kwame Alexander (author), Dawud Anyabwile (illustrator) (Andersen Press)

Heartstopper Vol 3 by Alice Oseman (Hachette Children’s Group)

 

Children’s Fiction

A Kind of Spark by Elle McNicoll (Knights Of)

Blended by Sharon M. Draper (Simon & Schuster)

Gargantis by Thomas Taylor (Walker)

The Highland Falcon Thief by M.G. Leonard & Sam Sedgman (Pan Macmillan)

 

Breakthrough Author

Brit Bennett author of The Vanishing Half (Dialogue Books)

Jean Menzies author of Greek Myths (Dorling Kindersley)

Kiley Reid author of Such a Fun Age (Bloomsbury)

Douglas Stuart author of Shuggie Bain (Pan Macmillan)

 

Danez Smith, author of Homie, said: “Books saved me, save me, will save me as long as I have a spirit to rescue from its own darkness and the dark corners of the world. To think that my little words might be doing the same for someone else, even one person, makes the work worth it. To be shortlisted for the Books are My Bag Readers Awards is beyond an honor, it affirms for me that my duty to poetry isn’t some selfish need to confess and be heard, but that poems are how we nourish one another, how we make sanctuary and fight for one another. I’m humbled to share the company of incredible writers, and to share the love and need of poetry with booksellers and readers everywhere.”

 

Jenny Offill, author of Weather, said: “I am a former bookseller myself, so this feels like the highest of honors to me! I am utterly thrilled to be nominated by such a discerning group of readers.”

 

Jean Mezies, nominated in the Breakthrough Author category, said: “It’s an absolute honour to have been nominated for the Books Are My Bag Breakthrough Award for Greek Myths, particularly given that it was chosen by booksellers. Exploring bookshops as a child and discovering titles on new and exciting topics thanks to the staff who curated their shelves is one of the main reasons I’m an Ancient Historian now.”

 

Emma Bradshaw, Head of Campaigns at the Booksellers Association, commented: “Curated by booksellers, the book experts par excellence, the Books Are My Bags Readers Awards are truly special awards. The shortlist always gives a fascinating insight into the reading trends of the year, and this year’s shortlist is particularly poignant given the impact COVID-19 has had on both our reading and shopping habits. Consumers appreciated anew the knowledge, dedication and expertise of booksellers during lockdown; a time when for many books were the only thing to bring hope and comfort. While we were unable to physically browse in bookshops, booksellers found new and creative ways of pairing their customers with the right book at the right time.  

 

This year we encourage consumers to think about their Christmas shopping earlier than usual and to support their high street. Whether you shop in-store or online with your local bookshop this Christmas, the Books Are My Bag Readers Awards shortlist is the ultimate book guide for shoppers; there’s something there for everyone. We hope book lovers will continue to support bookshops this Bookshop Day and beyond.”

 

Alex de Berry, Managing Director of National Book Tokens, said: “Not only are the Readers Awards the only book awards where the winners are chosen by truly democratic public vote, they have also proved to be a positive platform for diverse voices. We are immensely proud to have helped create these awards and to continue to be able to sponsor them.”

 

The Books Are My Bag Readers Awards, now in their fifth year, are the only book awards curated by booksellers, and voted for by readers. The shortlist panel comprises: Katharine Fry (Blackwell’s), Meera Ghanshamdas (Moon Lane Books), James Routledge (Forum Books), Mog and Pauline Harris (Warwick Books), Amy Vale (Book-ish) and Joe Hedinger (The Book Hive). The shortlist categories open for public vote are: Fiction, Non-Fiction, Poetry, Young Adult Fiction, Children’s Fiction and Breakthrough Author. In addition to voting on the shortlisted titles in the categories above, the public are invited to nominate their favourite book of the year – any book they’ve read in the past year – as the Readers’ Choice winner.

The public can vote online at the following link: www.nationalbooktokens.com/vote

 

The Books Are My Bag Readers Awards are sponsored by National Book Tokens and are part of Books Are My Bag – the annual campaign celebrating the vital importance of bookshops.

 For more information visit www.booksaremybag.com / @BooksAreMyBag / #BAMBReadersAwards

 

For the boys is a group exclusively for men, where, through Martial arts, they find support and understanding. by Natalie Jayne Peeke

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For the boys is a new group that started last month throughout Somerset. It is a group exclusively for Men where through the help of Martial arts they can find support and understanding. Here is what the incredible Craig Bissett had to say:

Why did you start your group?

For The Boys was started by Jack Insall and James Hilton, this group was started to help Men with support for everyday problems and mental struggles. Jack and James originally set it up as they had both been through bad times and wanted other men to know that they weren’t alone and there are other people there willing to help and talk.

B-Elite, I started B-Elite coming up to 5 years ago. B-Elite Martial Arts was originally set up as just a training group but over the years we have become a Family. With nearly 180 students from as young as 3 years of age through to some of our older students. Now over the last two years I started developing a Fitness programme that I found was helping people through not just a physical benefit but was also changing their mindset to one that was a lot more positive. This got me thinking… Plus for the last two years I have been working and helping teenagers with Autism, mental and physical disabilities too. Last year I also was asked to work with four young ladies going through school and college suffering with mental difficulties and some were even self harming. All four of these young ladies  are now smashing life…

So when I was asked to join For The Boys, I was blown away as I  could relate to some of the problems shared and I knew with what I do, I could definitely help give people a focus or aim in life and also help set their minds in a more positive way to help tackle their problems in a better way. Men find it hard telling people they need help and this group is there to say you’re not alone and we want to help…

 Where are you based?

B-Elite is based in Chilton Polden, just outside  Bridgwater. But I also teach in Bridgwater, Highbridge/Burnham and WSM. The main gym in Chilton Polden is fully kitted out for training and is a place where less confident students can train and feel comfortable. The Bridgwater gym is based at Trident and is  a fully equipped Gym and Martial Arts training area.

 What services do you offer? And When?

For the Boys offers a range of support and help pretty much around the clock. The group itself is based on most social networks and there are people on there sharing their stories, which I think you will understand is a big thing for them. People who are struggling can then talk to others who have dealt with similar problems or just want to be there to listen.

B-Elite, What B-Elite offer is a way to take your mind off your problems and worries through physical activities. Whether that’s Fitness or Martial Arts, in a group or on your own. Fitness helps create a more positive mindset and then you can tackle problem head on with a better outlook at them. With the Martial Arts side of training this helps build not only a stronger physical presence but also mental strength and self belief, with people seeing and feeling the results after just one lesson. Science behind Martial Arts, challenging the brain on a daily basis makes us more mentally strong. Hitting pads and bags actually releases chemicals in the body like Adrenaline and Endorphins which gives the body a natural high and we feel great from it. Classes and One2One Personal training run 7 days a week.

 How can Men get in touch?

There are a number of ways to get in touch or join…For The Boys Mental Health Talk Group is on all Social Media from Facebook to Twitter…TikTok to Instagram. Just search for them…

You can contact B-Elite on a number of different formats as follows…

Facebook Search B-Elite or Craig Bissett

Mobile – 07496569122

Website = www.b-elite.co.uk (Currently being updated)

And also we are on Twitter, Instagram and you can email me on mrb@b-elite.co.uk

 Do you feel men’s mental health isn’t talked about?

Yeah, I do. I think the whole stereotypical thing of ‘he is a man’ or ‘men are meant to be strong’ is silly. Men have huge pressures in life and suffer with a lot more than is lead to believe. From family worries, making sure they provide for their families. Having to ensure financial income, protection of family and much more. The problem we are seeing is that bloke aren’t actually dealing with these everyday problems well and turning to things that then put all of the above low in their priorities. We then see Men turning to addictions like Gambling, Drinking and even Drug abuse or in the worse cases Self Harm. We have a number of guys we are working with that are also suffering with Social and Domestic abuse and even abuse and bullying at work. There are lots of different problems that need addressing but in so many different ways.

 What are the names of the men on your team  and why did you ask them to join you?

For The boys Team

Jack Insall  James Hitlon   Lewis Pople Sam Mularczyk

 B-Elite

Myself, Craig Bissett  Lewis Pople and Sam Mularczyk are now also part of my team.

Helping provide solutions to all the above. Lewis and Sam were both suffering with their own problems and I decided they both needed a focus and aim in life so they are now training to be Coaches and Instructors, helping not only men but women butall the students I talked about earlier. They won’t only be helping with Fitness and Martial Arts teaching but I will be training them up in Wellbeing and Mental support.

 

What has the public reaction been like?

It has been AMAZING, as well as being covered by BBC Somerset and Burnham-On-Sea.com we are constantly getting people joining both ‘For The Boys’ and B-Elite groups. I have people contacting me on a daily basis asking for me to help them with their problems through fitness and talking. We often hear about the positive impact our hard work is having.

 Are you planning fundraisers/ future events?

We have already started planning the next Men’s Mental Health Event and also been asked by a number of people and groups to consider a Ladies and Kids event too. Which I am now also planning and I have contacted some sport icons and even a sports icon/movie star. SO very excited about these….The BBC once again have offered to cover these great stories.

 What role does fitness have on one’s mental health?

I never claim to be any expert in this field, I just know through self experience and the change to positive mental attitudes that Exercise and Fitness, pushing yourself and getting to unload in a safe and friendly environment is key to helping a lot of people. I talked a little earlier behind some of the science of fitness and martial arts and mentioned the proven fact that this definitely helps with focus and puts you in a better place to deal with problems and challenges with a greater outcome.

SISTER SCRIBES: CASS GRAFTON ON HER LOVE FOR DAPHNE DU MAURIER’S CORNWALL

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I’ve been reflecting lately on which books stand out most to me, from childhood through to the present day, and a pattern has emerged: my all-time favourite reads at any particular time of my life had a strong sense of place.

From Enid Blyton’s boarding school stories, through my teenage passion for the Brontës’ wild Yorkshire moorlands, it’s clear I was hooked on places from an early age. Onward I went into Jilly Cooper’s Rutshire, Harry Potter’s Hogwarts and Tolkien’s Middle Earth, always captivated by a good setting.

Alongside my fellow Sister Scribes friends, Kitty Wilson and Jane Cable, I have a deeply-rooted love of Cornwall, and whilst writing a recent novel, I thought back to when this fascination with the county began and realised it stemmed from my interest in a writer and her Cornwall-based stories: Daphne du Maurier.

It was the 1990s, and every autumn, my husband and I would spend a week on the south-east Cornish coast—days of kicking our way through crisp golden leaves, inhaling the smell of wood smoke from cottage chimneys, and watching the gulls wheel across steel-grey skies as waves lashed the rocky shoreline.

One of our favourite walks was the Hall Walk, which has stunning views across the charming town of Fowey and out towards Gribbin Head as you meander towards Pont Creek, onwards to Pont Pill and then back along the other side of the creek to Polruan.

During these holidays, I discovered Daphne du Maurier’s strong connection to the area, where she lived for many years, but at the time I had only read her most famous novel, Rebecca. I became fascinated with her life, devoured her biography and began to read her other works, beginning with the first full-length novel, The Loving Spirit.

Daphne often walked the Hall Walk from her then home at Ferryside, adjacent to the Bodinnick Ferry where it docked after crossing the river from Fowey. It was on this walk, at Pont Creek, that she came across a derelict schooner, the Jane Slade. Although the ship was rotting, the figurehead remained intact, and she became spellbound by the ship, not only often climbing aboard and imagining its past adventures, but also going on to make local enquiries into the vessel and the local family who had built her.

She absorbed the history of the boat-building Slades, sought out the family tombstone in the churchyard at Lanteglos, up above Polruan (the church where Jane Slade had been married and where Daphne herself went on to marry), and was also given access to some family letters.

Bewitched by all she was discovering and inspired by her surroundings, Daphne realised she had enough material for a novel, a book she wanted to write ‘in which atmosphere and a sense of place would dominate’.

The Loving Spirit (the title came from a poem by Emily Brontë) was published in 1931— with the Slade family becoming the Coombes and Polruan renamed as Plyn—and is still in print today.

The figurehead from the Jane Slade was given to Daphne, and it was mounted on a beam below her bedroom window at Ferryside, where it still hangs.

My love affair with Cornwall is as strong as ever, and I’m looking forward to when I can visit again, walking those beloved paths, taking in the breath-taking views and inhaling the atmosphere of the place my heart calls home.

 

Sources: Daphne du Maurier – Margaret Forster (1993), Vanishing Cornwall – Daphne du Maurier (1967)

 

 

 

Tips for squeezing the best out of the last few months of 2020

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By Sid Madge, author of the ‘Meee in a minute’ series of books 

2020 is proving to be the toughest year that most of us can remember. We’ve got through so far and can now look at how to adapt and get the most we can from the remaining few months of this year.   

According to a YouGov poll only 8% of Britons want to go back to life as it was before the pandemic.  

Let’s create something better for everyone instead of some watered down ‘new normal’. The first step for squeezing the best out of the rest of 2020 is to embrace uncertainty. There isn’t going to be some miracle vaccine by December, so what do we do now and for the rest of the year?  We grab the remainder of the year by the scruff of its neck and focus on changing for the better. 

Your Innate Growth Mindset

Stanford psychologist Carol Dweck became obsessed with understanding how people cope with failures and setbacks. Initially her research looked at kids and how they reacted to puzzles they couldn’t solve. The outcome of Dweck’s research is now world famous and she proposes that our success and happiness in life comes down to one thing – mindset. According to Dweck there are two – fixed and growth.  

Individuals with a fixed mindset, have a fixed idea of what they are capable of, believing that what they are born with is the finish line. They tend to be more defeatist. Those with a growth mindset believe that what we are born with is just the beginning. What we are capable of is determined by our own aspirations, effort and determination. 

Interestingly, Dweck believes we are all born with a growth mindset. We get trained out of it. We’re taught that failure is unacceptable – even though all great success comes through failure not by avoiding it. If ever we needed to re-assess that growth mindset it’s now. 

Take a minute to consider whether you have a fixed or growth mindset?  Has Covid-19 made it more fixed as you sink into a gloom? If you imagine you had a growth mindset instead – what would you do? Looking at your life and the rest of 2020 – what could you try? What have you always thought of doing but never got around to it? Lean into the uncertainty and adapt. Use it as a springboard to try things you’ve been putting off. Is there a different market you could approach? Stay curious, flexible, and open. 

Changing Your Today to Change Your Tomorrow

What have you done today? Is that getting you closer to your business and life goals or further away? If you want a different tomorrow so you find a successful way through the pandemic, you need to take steps to change what you do today. 

Stop for a moment and reflect on how you spend your time. When did you get up this morning?  How much TV do you watch?  How much time do you spend on social media? How much time do you spend learning something new? Do you spend time with family or friends?  Are those exchanges enjoyable or stressful? How much time do you spend on your health?  How much sleep do you get most nights? 

Take a minute to draw a circle and divide it up into slices that represent how you spend your time during a typical day. Now draw another circle and divide it up to represent how you would like to spend your day. If you spend a lot of time at work but don’t enjoy it, what could you do today to find a something that you might enjoy more? Or what could you change at in work/home life today to improve your day? Identify the things you like or can live with and the things that you don’t like and can’t live with. How can you change the aspects of your day that bring you down? 

Often, we don’t need to make big sweeping changes.  Subtle little shifts can accumulate to bring about change.  

Growth from Trauma

In 1967 psychiatrists Thomas Holmes and Richard Rahe developed a list of 47 stressful events that could impact health and happiness. The assumption is logical – we get more stressed when bad stuff happens to us, start accumulating stressful experiences such as a job loss, illness or divorce and you are more susceptible to physical illness, disease and depression. Global pandemics and economic uncertainty don’t help either.

However, the fly in their theoretical ointment was the fact that not everyone who experienced really tough life events were negatively impacted by them. On the contrary, some of those people actively flourished. This field of study is called post traumatic growth or adversarial growth and studies have shown that great suffering or trauma can actually lead to huge positive change. For example, after the Madrid bombings of 2004 psychologists found that many of those affected experienced positive psychological growth. A diagnosis of cancer and subsequent recovery can also trigger positive growth. 

The people in many of these studies found new meaning and new purpose from surviving something terrible. Instead of seeing their situation as a failure or a problem they believed it could make them stronger. How can you use Covid-19 to find new meaning and positive growth?

Take a minute to think about exactly what you are worried about most in your life and identify one thing you can do about it right now. Set that in motion. What positives could you pull from the turmoil? Get creative – think of at least three positives that Covid-19 could give you. It might not be fun but if you can find the silver linings you can often move on quicker.

These suggestions are pulled from my Meee in a Minute books, each offering 60 one-minute micro-ideas and insights that can help us to shift our perception in life, family and at work.  We can all use tiny interventions to adapt and change and make the very best we can of the months ahead. 

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Sid Madge is founder of Meee (My Education Employment Enterprise) which draws on the best creativity and thinking from the worlds of branding, psychology, neuroscience, education and sociology, to help people achieve extraordinary lives.

To date, Meee has transformed the lives of over 20,000 people, from leaders of PLC’s and SME’s to parents, teachers, students, carers, the unemployed and prison inmates.

Sid Madge is also author of the ‘Meee in Minute’ series of books which each offer 60 ways to change your life, work-, or family-life in 60 seconds. 

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