The Voice. week 5- BATTLES!

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Before you ask, yes I have watched both ‘battle rounds’ of The Voice this weekend. Anyone who was on twitter, and if you weren’t then it’s probably time to pull the red chord and get the nurse to tell you what it is, will know that I was tweeting my bitchy little bum off through both shows.
Even though I watched all forty acts battle it out, I was painfully aware of the utter nonsense of this ‘battle’ format by the end of the third bout.


Let’s get it said shall we? Whoever designed this part of the show needs sending to ITV, or Channel five at a push, to design and extreme version of ‘Celebrity Naked Big Brother in the Jungle with Robots and Fire’ and never be allowed near a singing competition again- ANY singing competition!
Even the X-Factor wouldn’t have allowed this pointless, counter-intuitive, and self destructive idea off someone’s drool-laminated iPad and into the production offices.
The reasons why this is about as far removed from finding , “The Voice” (a title I’m having to check is still in place with every passing minute) as the This Morning prize question is from Mastermind are almost too many to list but let’s just look at it in simple terms.
We’re looking for ‘The Voice’, right? OK, so, regardless of any mistakes made getting to this point let’s at least move forward with that premise in mind.
We’ve got four different ‘coaches’ from different genres and generations of music- ok, well then it makes sense that each should have a team that represents their music.
Jessie J can represent independent modern funky girls. Danny, the indie singer-songwriter boys. Will.D.Beast can coach hip-hop and R’n’B types, and Tom can handle the big divas and the crooners. If we really HAVE to have some kind of battle then it should at least be team against team, Like ‘Top Trumps’, right?
No? Well it was just a thought. It took me about as long as it took to type and it’s still miles better than what we ended up with.
Ok, how about this. We have 40 acts- can’t call them voices because there are two pairs in there- don’t ask! How about we pick the best twenty to go through?
I know it sounds simple but that’s logic for you. It may be almost insultingly obvious, like giving a team talk that goes, “How about we try and win this game?” Or Maximus from ‘Gladiator’ ditching his, “you’re already dead” battle cry in favour of , “Kill those guys and try not to get killed yourselves, Ok? Now off you go!” But I really feel someone at the BBC needs sitting down with an adult and talking to.
You’d think that taking the best singers on to the next stage would be the starting point of any elimination round- kind of the whole point in fact.
Not on The Voice! Oh no sir! I bet Kerry Ellis, Nathan James and all the other professionals with their dignity still safely intact must have watched this weekend’s shows with enormous relief. Like seeing a news report that the train they missed that morning has been held up by Mexican bandits and the passengers have been forced to suck smoothies through the bandits’ underpants at gunpoint.
There were times I couldn’t look and others I couldn’t listen either.
Some will argue that it makes good TV. They’d be right. I was gripped but for the wrong reasons. Embarrassing Bodies is un-missable TV but they don’t call it , “The Arse” and claim it’s a search for the Britain’s best colon do they?
It was meant to be filled with a kind of ‘rumble in the jungle’ tension. A ‘sing in the ring’ if you will. It was more like ‘shout through a bout’ in some cases and the whole thing became more like Thunderdome. I half expected Tina Turner to be Tom Jones’ assistant and start calling him ‘raggedy man’ while the crowd chant for blood and throw weapons in to mix it up a bit.
Instead we got Cery’s ‘one-yard-stare’ Matthews for Tom, and Dante Santiago for Will who said that the first two girls, Joelle and Jenny were two of the ‘illest’ singers in the competition. Before they could misunderstand him and go for a lie down in spite of feeling fine, he went on to shoot himself straight in the foot by then saying he wanted them to be, “simple, natural… like Michael Jackson” at which point you could hear people spitting tea over themselves on every street in the country.
Being incredibly cool myself and, in fact, being so far down with the kids I need a CRB check whenever I leave the house, I knew exactly what Dante meant and he was right. These two girls were two of the best singers in the whole thing and yet here we were, choosing to get rid of one of them because…. Because? Anyone?
“You two are so similar, I only have room for one of your kind in my team.” Danny told Bill and Max before they went on.
It’s not Noah’s Ark Danny! You don’t have to collect one of every species mate!
Bill, like Jenny before him, was sent home in the sure knowledge that someone far less talented than him would go through. I agree that Max was the better out of the two but that should never have been the choice in the first place. Like Danny said, “The UK are thinking I’m an idiot for putting these two together” but it’s worse than that. He had no choice.
This format forced him to put them together because he could hardly have put the five weakest against the five strongest to be sacrificed in the ring could he?
This format is responsible for Bill going home and Sam Buttery (real name- honest) going through. Sam, the love child of Timmy Mallet and Dom Jolly, is clearly a lovely guy. I’d have him round for tea any day, but ‘The Voice’ he aint.
There were far too many examples of good singers going home. Lindsey Butler went home and so did Vince Freeman while Ruth-Ann ‘it’s-in-there-somewhere’ St. Luce and Matt ‘the Wookie’ and Suleen went through to the live finals where their ‘stories’ will almost certainly be wrung dry in shameless vote-garnering just like every other shallow, American-style reality show.
It’s just ridiculous!
When I heard about ‘The Voice’ I was expecting something from the BBC of the calibre of Strictly Come Dancing. Filled with genuine judgment of actual ability and packed with integrity where, when the public get a little carried away with voting for a Sergeant, or a Widdecombe, they’re told by Len Goodman- now come on folks, enough of this silliness, this is a serious competition!
Watching ‘The Voice’ this weekend was more like watching Robot Wars than Strictly. Does anyone have Len’s number by any chance? It’s not too late.

 

 

 

AlunaGeorge to release new single in June | Music News

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Hotly-tipped British duo AlunaGeorge have announced that their new single, ‘You Know You Like It’, is out on June 11th, via Tri Angle Records, just a month before they take to the stage at this year’s Wireless Festival. The band, who describe their sound as “taking the boom and glitch of British bass culture and allying it to the slick sweetness of classic American SWV or Destiny’s Child-style R&B”, are comprised of Aluna Francis and George Reid. The single will be their first on Tri Angle records, home to oOoOO, Holy Other and Evian Christ.

‘You Know You Like It’, is out on June 11th, via Tri Angle Records. Catch them on tour in the UK in May and June.

 

 

 

 

UK ‘is hovering on the brink of a double dip recession’.

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The UK is hovering on the brink of a double dip recession Official Gross Domestic Product (GDP) figures due out on Wednesday are expected to show the UK narrowly escaping a double dip recession; however many experts predict we’re still not safe. With mixed signals coming from different sectors and unemployment decreasing only marginally, albeit for the first time in a year, the UK seems to be teetering on the edge. The fragile economic conditions and high unemployment are putting many households under pressure to save money. This is fuelling the growth and popularity of cashback sites and discount culture; websites such as TopCashBack have nearly doubled the amount of its members in the past 12 months alone.

 

Natasha-Rachel Smith, Spokesperson for TopCashBack, said, “Households are under increasing pressure to save money and cut costs, especially since the UK fell into financial turmoil five years ago. With many households saddled with debt, consumers are reluctant to pay more than they deem is absolutely necessary for purchases, and are drawn by the savings and discounts offered through the innovative techniques of the internet, such as cashback sites.” Natasha-Rachel added, “The strong growth in demand for such online offerings is being fuelled by the recessionary environment, fragile consumer confidence and a strong desire for people to conserve their cash as steadfastly as possible.”

Londoner’s Life 28 – By Phil Ryan

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Londoner’s Life 28 – By Phil Ryan
Well its Marathon week so the news has been full of people pounding the streets for various good causes. And despite the goodwill towards them the London fight back against charity Chuggers seems well and truly under way. Quite a few London councils are actually banning them and I’m with them. To me the most worrying aspect is people (dumb people) who gaily hand over their bank details to some smiling young person who they’ve never met in the middle of the street. Hello? Security issue? I guess a picture of a beagle having a fag makes people put their brains in neutral. But to be honest I know charities are suffering so they need every trick in the book they can use. And I know in a recession it’s difficult. Sadly the street hustler’s in bright tabards scenario is the worst one they use so I’ll be glad to see the back of them. And London does seem to be the charity capital of the universe somedays, especially in the centre of town. My strategy is to brightly smile at them and sweep past them at two hundred miles an hour. Alternatively if I’m bored I try to borrow money off them.
In my on-going investigations into the plethora of trendy new blocks popping up all over town I’ve come across so many that seem to be like outposts in hostile territory. I guess it’s part of the continuing gentrification process that is affecting places like Brixton as I recently mentioned. But some of the strangest I’ve come across are in parts of docklands. I found one gleaming tower ringed by low rise endless council blocks. It was weird. It stuck out like a sore thumb. It had shiny plate glass doors and a guy in a uniform complete with a peaked hat on the door. There were those two green shrubs in pots they always have and it looked like it had beamed down from a spaceship. God knows what the locals thought. Although I did notice a charming group of track suited wearing youngsters each with obligatory pit bull leaning on the little white wall outside the place. A lovely view to come home to for the new London designer block dwellers. And realistically gentrification of this particular area entirely predicated only on some kind of nuclear war. But it did point to a wider issue of how the developers are shoving their monstrosities in every odder places. The London Evening Standard is now full of pages advertising places such as Hendon Heights and Dollis Hill Point. Huh? The text is unbelievable. Desirable living? In Hendon which smells of death and misery. And Dollis Hill with the sound of gunfire and police sirens. I suppose on viewing you just have to close your eyes until you’re safely inside the building. Very desirable. Hm.
This week I found myself in Kingly Court off Carnaby Street at a TV series launch from Synced Films and I was amazed by the mix of fantastic shops and crazy designer outlets. So before the launch I had a nose around. My favourite place being a lovely shop called Best of British a place full of British designed products. The prices were actually reasonable much to my surprise. And the quality of their stuff was brilliant. Plus I found a great hat shop! ( I’m partial to Panama hats occasionally in summer but only when I’m in Europe and going to linen suited summer events) And again the prices were affordable. A very unusual thing in such a place in comparison to many other such designer malls. And the bars around the place were heaving. So much so that I realised I had again stumbled across the mad and on-going London phenomenon of going to a trendy bar but then standing outside it on the pavement. Odd eh? You pay over the top prices for drinks but never actually get to see the interior of the place you’re paying through the nose for. We have one in West Hampstead. People have to go past the standard guy on the door to get entry. But then re-appear to stand outside. I guess it’s a style thing.
Finally looking forwards it’s just a 100 days to the Olympics. So that’ll be a nightmare of overcrowded public transport, prices going up in in every bar and restaurant with ‘Olympic specials’ and a blizzard of PR puff pieces in every media outlet. I see a recent survey showed half of London doesn’t give a stuff about the Olympics. Surprise! But hey ho we’re stuck with it. As for me I’ll be travelling a lot during the games. The rest of the time I’ll be working away at home in peace. It’s all about planning you could say. So let the nightmare commence. But do any of us care? No not really. It’s a London thing.

Game Change Film Review by Daniel McCarthy.

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‘It’s God’s plan’ a calm Sarah Palin (Julianne Moore) announces as she is chosen to become the Republican vice presidential nominee in the historic American election of 2008. The events themselves seem so fresh and vivid in the memory that to describe them as history feels somewhat redundant. We all remember the raised eyebrows and gasps of incredulity as the Governor of Alaska was plucked from relative obscurity to become one of the most recognised faces on the planet. Few could predict the ultimate outcome. Based largely on the political journal of the same name, Game Change tracks the decision by the McCain campaign team to hoist a ‘game changing element’ into the ring of the election. Head organiser Steve Schmidt (Woody Harrelson) believes that a fiery right wing candidate will boost bedrock support whilst her being a woman will cross the gender divide and provide a celebrity counter balance to Barack Obama’s unprecedented popularity. John McCain (Ed Harris) is delighted with the decision especially after her barnstorming opening speeches. However joy soon turns to dread as they discover that Palin is woefully ignorant on America’s key foreign policies. Public adulation turns to mockery and she soon begins to buckle under the strain of the campaign. The rest as they say is history…

The release date of Game Change has not gone unnoticed in political circles with Plain and McCain having accused the film of lies before having even watched it. With a new election looming the timing could not be more noticeable. Of course it is the portrayal and performances that will define such a project. As Palin, Julianne Moore is quite frankly a tour de force. Often critics get caught up in their own adjectives and hyperbole but in all sincerity; there are moments I forgot I was watching Julianne Moore. The physical and vocal ticks are uncanny yet there is a strong parallel between the images of Palin that we recall and the portrayed image that we were not privy to. Moore perfectly conveys the sense of someone desperately out of their depth yet refusing to fold. The media harassment that hounded her and her family is plain to see for all including those opposed to her politics. As much as race and age played a crucial factor in Obama and McCain’s public image, so to do the fact that Palin was a woman and may have forgotten (or overlooked) the frankly misogynistic attitude of many mainstream media outlets towards her at the time of her campaign. These elements are expertly woven by director Jay Roach into the narrative along with archive and interview footage edited to seem that the actors are interacting with their real life counterparts. This includes an incredibly self referential moment when a humiliated Palin watches the now infamous Saturday Night Live sketch with Tina Fey.

But it is in the ultimate treatment of Palin that the film falls short. Whilst casting her in sympathetic light for the opening act the descent into an ‘uncontrollable renegade’ seems to come too fast and comes off as a tad unconvincing, a shame considering the initial scenes. There is a genuine punch the air moment in the third act when Schmidt (a brilliant Harrelson) puts her firmly in place whilst retaining a professional tone but it’s the one subtle moment toward the finale that you can increasingly feel the melodrama creeping in. The film can’t decide to ultimately exonerate her or to condemn her. It doesn’t help that McCain himself is pretty much side lined by the drama. Ed Harris is a magnificent screen presence and though certainly not up to Moore’s pedigree he definitely has McCain’s physicality nailed. Yet he is reduced to watching from the side lines occasionally stepping forward to deliver a bit of sage advice for the ‘young firebrands.’ It’s a waste of a great performer and whilst I normally wouldn’t mind in any other work I severely doubt the actual John McCain swears so much. It passes over from shocking into quite frankly silly.

HBO have maintained a high standard of quality across a range of platforms and to a degree it’s really encouraging to see a television movie draw such talent to it and get such a wide release. I don’t think it’s flawless by any means though I concede that projects like this will always divide opinion in their portrayal of such recent events. The powerhouse performances see it through however and with the election just around the corner who knows; maybe we’ll be back here in four years?

Chase PR AW12 Press Preview: Brand Watch

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I went along to Chase PR’s press preview. They have some brilliant brands and I picked out some brands to watch.

Butterfly Twists. This are great fold-able shoes and boots. Perfect to have in your bag to whip out when the heels start to hurt.

Daniel Hechter – Crease proof tailored suits. A brilliant idea. A range for travellers and commuters.

Sebago shoes. Most of the brands are using the patriotic colours of red, blue and white for the Olympic/Jubilee year. Sebago have a great new range of shoes.

I love Cat footwear. They also do heels and boots now.

These glasses go dark in the sun and become sunglasses – so cool.

Storm – the only British watch brand. They do great watches and jewellery.

Energie have some great colourful jeans and Christmas type jumpers.

Gok Wan also has a new line of shapewear out.

Red or Dead have great clothes – lots of lace- and some really awesome shoes. Including some green sequined ones. I like!

Miss Sixty. A lot of clothes have a grown-up vibe. Influences from Mad Men and Pam Am. There is a definite vintage vibe. As well as coloured denim.

Patagonia

Bright, coloured waterproof coats.

Geox has a brilliant range of breathable shoes. They stop your feet getting too hot.

And of course...Paul Costelloe. A designer legend.

Forward PR Press Day AW12

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Forward PR AW12 press day was full of wonderful designers. The collections by Jasper Garvida, Jaida Hay, SD Yohans, Euphorik, Corrie Nielsen, Magenta 8 and Emma Yeo were all brilliant. AO FMpro make-up gave me a make-over. I didn’t want to take the make-up off ever!

Corrie Nielsen was my favourite show at London Fashion Week. Her clothes are amazing.

Emma collaborated with Corrie Nielsen for her AW12 London Fashion Week show. She makes the most beautiful hat.

Sleek and timeless menswear designer Euphorik.

Jaida Hay was a particular favourite. I had a chat with her and hope to do an interview with her soon. She worked at Emilia Wickstead Atelier prior to launching her own line. I love the draping, wraps and sports luxe edge to her collection. Some incredibly beautiful pieces. It is minimalist luxury but also is made with sustainable fabrics and made solely in the United Kingdom.

Jasper Garvida: Another fav.

Inspiration from the 1950s here, a popular theme. A lot of designers are doing collections that are very grown up. Magenta 8 are a luxury design house. Lots of tailoring.

SD Yohans’ shoes celebrate a lady’s elegance and strength. I love the collection. I really want all of these shoes.

Sure Maximum Protection Event and Review

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On Tuesday I was invited to a Sure Maximum Protection Event at Vanilla. I was also given a sample of the deodorant to try out beforehand. When I arrived I was greeted by lots of lovely people and there were lots of themed cocktails (three flavours. I tried them all!), and games. I won the quotes game by pairing famous women to their quotes and won two tickets to LoveBox in June. Very excited to be seeing Lana Del Ray. It was a great night with brilliant company.

Back to the deodorant: it works. After I received it I went to the gym and my underarms stayed dry. I was very impressed. it really works. It smells great too. There are three super conditioning, maximum protection deodorants available in Confident, Sensitive and Clean Fresh Scent. They use a Trisolid formula which has three components:

* The maximum wetness protection ever from Sure
* Encapsulated odour-fighting technology, and
* Skin moisturising ingredients.

There was a scientist at the event who did a neat little trick, showing how the deodorant stops a glass of water which is covered in a cloth pouring any water out. Very cool.

Sure Maximum Protection is definitely my deodorant of choice now. RRP of £5.09 for 45ml.