Kiss Your Fights Good-Bye Book Review

Kiss Your Fights Good-byeKiss Your Fights Good-bye: Dr. Love’s 10 Simple Steps to Cooling Conflict and Rekindling Your Relationship by America’s “love doctor”, Dr. Jamie Turndorf is an interesting read. Everyone spends time thinking about their relationships. The book is a practical 10-step programme that says it will help achieve a deeper, healthier bond with your partners.

I have a good relationship with my other half and there aren’t any huge issues but I was still excited to read the book and pick up some tips, but to be honest I didn’t relate to the book. I thought it had too many gender stereotypes that I could not relate to. Like women withholding sex as punishment or to get what they want- which I actually thought was offensive, and that men just withdraw every time a fight happens. I also did not like some of the scenarios with couples. The men calling their wives bitches for example. If a man called me a bitch there would not be a relationship to fix.

I feel that this book is for people with worse relationships than me, or people who are more suited to typical gender stereotypes. It is not that it doesn’t have any good advice: it does but most of it was not relatable to me. Worth a read if your fighting all of the time and you, or your partner, fit the stereotypes.

Known to millions as ‘Dr. Love’, Jamie Turndorf, PhD, has been seen on numerous TV shows and has over 30 years’ experience as a relationship counsellor. Her impressive endorsements include:

“Dr Turndorf has relationships figured out. If you want a great relationship, you must follow her ten-step method for lasting love.” – Jack Canfield, Chicken Soup for the Soul.

“If anger and fighting are ruining your dream of a happy marriage (or relationship), Dr Turndorf’s conflict-resolution programme is for you.” – John Gray, author of the #1 New York Times bestseller Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus

Kiss Your Fights Good-bye: Dr. Love’s 10 Simple Steps to Cooling Conflict and Rekindling Your Relationship

10 tips on fighting the festive flab in the New Year

getfit lose weight10 tips on fighting the festive flab in the New Year By Garry Kerr, Head of Training and Operations at British Military Fitness

Nom, nom, nom…extra eating: During the winter and especially over the festive

season we typically eat more than we would normally and exercising is a great way

to burn those extra calories and keep yourself in shape so when spring finally arrives

you’re in tip top shape! Here are some tips to help you beat the Christmas flab!

 

1. Keep a fitness journal

 

A workout log can help keep your exercise routine on track when you’re

struggling to stay motivated because it will show you how far you’ve come

since you started, and therefore how worthwhile it is to keep going.

 

2. Commit yourself.

 

Get moving! Just do it! There is no time like the start of a New Year. You’ve

got the indulgences of Christmas behind but it’s important you commit. Why

not write all the classes you can attend in your diary so they are viewed as

actual appointments and you’re less likely to cancel.

 

3. Set short-term goals

 

Having something specific to aim for, such as losing a certain amount

of weight or entering a race / marathon for example the Major Series

in the Spring will help you stick to your training

plan. But make sure your goals are achievable. Setting and failing to reach

outlandish targets will put you off.

 

4. Find the fun in it

 

Exercise should not feel like torture. After all, you have made a conscious

decision to do it. You can take great pleasure from overcoming challenges

and progressing with your fitness alongside other people.

 

Does that mean that it will be easy? No. In order to change your body, you

need to experience ‘overload’. This means that you need to keep challenging

your body in order to increase your fitness levels. You will however improve

your fitness levels if you rest and recover properly after each workout.

 

5. Reward yourself

 

Once you’ve hit one of your targets reward yourself. By training and

committing to your training you’ve earned the right to spoil yourself. Whether

it’s a new item of clothing or fitness-related gadgets or clothing – enjoy your

achievements.

 

6. Use visualisation

 

If you don’t believe that you can do that final burpee or make it through

those final reps, you certainly won’t be able to but by picturing yourself doing

it before you try it, you’ll create a mental template that can translate into

success.

 

7. Eating right

 

Food is 90% of the health and fitness battle. You can make great changes

just through making small adjustments to your eating habits alone. While

changing any habits may seem like a daunting task, there is a wealth of

resources available to guide you. By eating a regular mix of proteins, fats and

carbohydrates you will reap the benefits of your physical training routine. You

will have both the energy to perform and the nutritional foundations needed

for recovery. This exercise and nutrition relationship will help you to achieve

your goals

 

8. Be realistic

 

Rome wasn’t built in a day. Unfortunately, while over-used, there is some truth

in that saying.

 

A healthy approach is to aim to improve on yesterday. By repeating this

process you will start to feel like you have made great improvements over a

course of weeks, months and years. It is also important to consider where you

want to be.

 

9. There is gain without pain!

 

While exercise should be challenging in order to encourage the body to adapt

and therefore improve, it should not lead to any injuries.

 

Many people, particularly those new to exercise can become over enthusiastic

because of the physical changes that they experience. Our bodies can only

truly complete exercises at 100% intensity for a number of seconds. Exercises

completed over the course of an hour-long session are performed below

maximum intensity. You should therefore focus more on your technique and

try to work as hard as possible but not push yourself to the point of nausea.

 

10. Abandon an all-or-nothing attitude

 

Don’t think of exercise with an all-or-nothing approach. If you unexpectedly

miss a session, don’t beat yourself up. Just get back on track tomorrow.

Remember; exercise and fitness is a way of life, it’s not a destination.