Doctor Who: 'Closing Time' Review

,… or Two [Cyber]Men and a baby.

In my eyes Season 5 of the new Doctor Who was a weak and uninspiring slog, and easily poorest series since the show returned. But there was a real diamond in the rough; ‘The Lodger’.

Gareth Roberts’ adaptation of his own Doctor Who Magazine comic strip was a joyful, warm-hearted and spirited comedy episode that I loved to bits. So when it was announced that he would be penning a sequel I was pretty excited. But did he deliver? Well, yes and no,…

The Doctor is on a farewell tour, flitting around the universe to catch up on events and experiences that he’s missed out on over the years. He knows that death is on its way and he’s going to make the most of the time he’s got left. Which includes, it seems, a visit to his old mate Craig – now the proud but overwhelmed father of baby Alfie (or Stormageddon; Dark Lord of All, as he likes to be known).

But, this being Doctor Who, The Doctor’s flying visit is derailed by his discovery of Cybermen stalking around the ladies changing rooms at a local department store (ooer!) Cue slapstic monster fighting, Laurel and Hardy level bickering and frolics in the lingerie isle!

Now, for the most part, this episode is a fun and chucklesom romp; it’s Doctor Who; the Situation Comedy. All that’s needed is a wryly named coffee shop, a contractual visit to a bowling alley and a barely plausible laughter track and you’re away!

This isn’t, to my eyes, a bad thing; the programme has been many things in its time – Hammer Horror, surreal Buddhist morality tale, James Bond-esque action adventure – why not a sitcom? It wouldn’t work every week but I’d argue that the occasional flat-out funny episode is no bad thing. I mean it’s not Battlestar Galactica is it?

And it is, indeed, very funny! Matt Smith and James Corden have a brilliant chemistry, with Craig being the straight man to the Doctor’s geeky funnyman. The moment when Craig realises that they’ve been teleported to the Cybership is comedy gold, beautifully played by both. His ham-fisted interrogation of the shop girl had me in stitches.

However, the best lines were handed to young Stormageddon, ably translated by the Doctor – who speaks baby (yeah, right!) “and everybody else?,… Peasants. That’s unfortunate.”

It’s a great script of terrific comic moments and spanking dialogue.

And Cybermen. Damn, I knew you were going to bring them up.

This was not the Metal Men from Mondas’ finest hour. In fact the story would’ve probably worked better without them. All they do is stomp around the place looking mildly pathetic. Their presence is undermined by the revelation that they’re low on juice and low on spare parts. They’re not a fighting force, they’re Dads Army.

Which is a shame because they look wonderful. And the Cybermat is a welcome return from a classic series stalwart. But they’re entirely peripheral to the story and to throw away Doctor Who’s second biggest enemy as, essentially, comedy goons does nobody any favours, least of all the brilliant Gareth Roberts.

So, to me, the story didn’t deliver everything it promised; the comedy was brilliant but the action and threat were sorely lacking. Compared with Craig’s first outing, where his life, his relationship with the love of his life and, ultimately, the fate of the world was in jeopardy,… well this was a bit of a come down, really.

But as come-downs go, ‘Closing Time’ is one I’d watch again.

Doctor Who: 'Let's Kill Hitler' Review

Doctor Who has never been more bonkers. And there are some who would argue that it’s never been better. After a storming opening run to series 6, I’m beginning to think that they may just have a point.

So, Let’s Kill Hitler. Rory and Amy, impatient at waiting for news of their daughter (the soon-to-be River Song) form a crop circle to bring the Doctor back into their lives. When it works, we’re off into another adventure into Steven Moffat’s, frankly potty, Scottish head. And what does he give us to delight us on a Saturday night? Numbskulls vs. Hitler.

Let me repeat that, just in case it hasn’t sunk in.  NUMBSKULLS vs. HITLER!! It shouldn’t work, it sounds awful, it should be cringe-worthy trash,… but it wasn’t. It was brilliant.

Of course, that was just a side show really. This episode was really about two people, Mel and River Song. Who were, in fact, the same person (keeping up? Not for long,..). Y’see, Amy and Rory have been living with their own daughter since they were children at primary school together. Indeed, their bessie-mate, Mel, was not only young Melody Pond all along, but was also the person who brought Rory and Amy together in the first place (still following? We’ll see about that…). And, of course, she wanted to kill the Doctor. Then Hitler shot her and she turned into Alex Kingston.

Let’s face facts. Even if you put Numbskulls vs. Hitler to one side (Numbskulls vs. Hitler!!), it’s still completely insane.

That it worked was testament to the ‘human’ story at the centre of it all – the rehabilitation of the psychotic River Song into the Doctor’s future missus, and the Doctor’s struggle with his own inner demons (“Is there anybody in the universe that I’ve not screwed up?”). Matt Smith and Alex Kingston put in truly superb performances in this episode, helped enormously by a cracking script that fizzed with energy.

Their intellectual jousting was a joy, with the Doctor disarming every weapon that River could pull on him, but failing to foresee a deadly kiss.

And what of Amy and Rory? Well, we have a lovely bit of backstory early on in the episode and Arthur Darvill gets to put more meat on his ‘action man’ persona after smacking the Fuhrer in the mouth and nicking a motorbike from a Nazi (very Indiana Jones). Apart from that, however, Mr. and Mrs. Pond stay on the sidelines for most of the story – inside robot Amy’s head (I know!).

But that’s the great thing about the rejuvenated Doctor Who, it’s the only show on television that has the balls to be quite this loopy. And I like loopy. In today’s world of dreary crime dramas and celebrity-obsessed talent shows, Doctor Who has become a beacon of light to those of us who don’t want to be talked down to by our Goggle Box. It’s insane, confusing, quick, fun, and it doesn’t make any concessions for people who can’t keep up.

It trusts that you will.

Which makes it the best thing on TV.

SILENCE WILL FALL…New Doctor Who Villian Arrives

SILENCE WILL FALL…

THE SILENCE

ARRIVING AT THE

DOCTOR WHO EXPERIENCE

ON FRIDAY 13th MAY

{above picture} One of Doctor Who’s most terrifying enemies, The Silence, stands behind an unsuspecting Welsh Guard in Pall Mall, ahead of their arrival at the highly-acclaimed Doctor Who Experience at London’s Olympia 2 venue. The fully interactive themed experience and exhibition invites visitors to step through a crack in time to become the Doctor’s companion on an adventure. Their challenge will be to reunite the Doctor with the TARDIS whilst fending off threats from a Dalek spaceship and Weeping Angels along the way, before exploring the wonders of Doctor Who at an out of this world exhibition.

This Friday 13th May Doctor Who Experience will prove monsters are real by giving you the opportunity to come face-to-face with one of Doctor Who’s most terrifying of monsters to date as The Silence arrive at the Doctor Who Experience.

The Silence will be on show in the walk-through part of the Doctor Who Experience following their appearance in the opening two episodes of the award-wining series, The Impossible Astronaut and Day of the Moon.

Fans will be able to encounter these terrifying monsters for the first time, who, with their powers of telepathy and eerie ability to erase themselves from your memory have been cited as one of the Doctor’s more frightening foes.

Glimpse one of these creatures at Doctor Who Experience and you may feel slightly unsettled the moment it’s out of view but the real question is… will you remember?

Come fly the TARDIS and dare to meet The Silence, by taking a starring role in your very own Doctor Who adventure at the Doctor Who Experience. Step through the crack in time and become the Doctor’s companion in this exhilarating walk through experience that recreates all the best parts of the hit TV series. Come face to face with some of the scariest monsters seen on the screen including Daleks, Cybermen and the latest addition from series 6: The Silence.

There’s fun for family and fans alike with the largest collection of authentic Doctor Who props and artefacts including all the previous Doctor’s iconic costumes, the original David Tennant TARDIS set and even interactive lessons in how to walk like a Cyberman!

Tickets on sale at www.doctorwhoexperience.com

Door Price / Advance peak / Advance off-peak

· Adult: £20.00 / £18.00 / £15.50

· Child (5 to 16): £15.50 /£14.00 /£12.50

· Under 5’s are free

· Family of 4: £62.00 / £52.00 /£46.00

Schools/Groups/Tour Operators: separate pricing.

London Fashion Week 2011.

This February I went to my first hard core fashion week, okay I went to a few things last year, but this year I went to so many things I was so exhausted I didn’t know if I could get up the next day! I went to Caroline Charles’s show – beautiful cloths but the models were too young and the juxtaposition was jarring- Pam Hogg; Disorganised, How to walk in high heels at the Mayfair hotel (Amazing, my favourite) I drank too much cola, ended up in a making off and found out how many calories are in a big mac and french fries (820!) I had fun and there is a video below. Hope you like it. It has Paloma Faith, Boy George, Matt Smith, Karen Gillan, Jaime Winston, Jodie Harsh, Daisy Lowe and Charlotte Dellal in it.

In The Pink – How Doctor Who Turned Gay

Before Matt Smith became the 11th incarnation of Doctor Who, there was the usual excited comment in the media. Would – or could – the new Doctor be black, a woman, or gay?

Seeing as Time Lords seemingly don’t have the habit or ability of changing sex or race, the talk is always irrelevant and frankly, redundant. But that doesn’t stop the lively debate every time there’s a change of face.

As it turned out, Smith’s Doctor is, like all the others, male, white and seemingly straight, but William Hartnell’s irascible first Doctor from 1963 aside, Doctor Who has always bordered on camp with more than a degree of innuendo.

With the advent of the Swinging Sixties later in the decade, more overt sexuality crept in with mini-skirted female companions – and mini-skirted males, if you care to count Frazer Hines’ kilted highlander, Jamie McCrimmon.

Wendy Padbury’s Zoe Herriot often crops up in Whovian conversations thanks pretty much to a spangly, tight purple zip-up jump suit she once wore while scrambling on to the Tardis console. But it was probably Katy Manning’s character of Jo Grant who is most fondly remembered as the girl who first put the sex into Doctor Who.

Jo, apart from being a good screamer as the role frequently required, had a tendency to flash her knickers courtesy of her early 1970’s outfit of short skirt and plastic boots. Not only did Manning thus cement her role as the first crush of small boys and the lust object of dads everywhere, ratings went through the roof.

After Manning left the series, she capitalised by posing nude with a Dalek, but it was really only as Doctor Who began its decline in the mid-1980s that Nicola Bryant’s Peri Brown briefly stirred the watching public again by appearing in a much-commented upon – and criticised – skimpy bikini.

Peter Davison has also frequently mentioned how his intense death scene as the fifth Doctor was completely upstaged by Bryant’s cleavage as she knelt beside him, but even the Doctors’ famed regenerations eventually proved no match for the BBC hierarchy. Where numerous enemies had tried and failed, poor stories and a poor time slot brought the Time Lord’s career to a close in December 1989.

Enter Russell T Davies. The TV Producer and Screenwriter had a number of hits on his CV before he tackled the resurrection of Doctor Who in 2005, including Queer as Folk, a controversial series about the Manchester gay scene, drawn loosely on Davies’ own experiences.

Despite initial scepticism, under Davies’ stewardship the ninth Doctor – portrayed by Christopher Eccleston along with Billie Piper’s superb Rose Tyler – was a huge hit. When Eccleston left, David Tennant’s Time Lord took the ratings even higher.

It would take an extremely brave move to make such an iconic figure as the Doctor into a gay man. And chances are that if anyone could have done it, Davies is the one, but that’s always likely to be a step too far for the BBC.

And yet, the reborn Doctor Who embraces numerous gay references, all the more remarkable in a top-rated, worldwide, prime time TV show aimed at the family. In fact, it is probably the gayest, non-gay programme anywhere in the TV schedules.

Davies is responsible for writing many of the episodes, but it was the Steven Moffat-penned ‘The Empty Child’, which introduces John Barrowman’s Captain Jack Harkness, with Barrowman’s character the obvious crutch – pun intended – for what soon becomes a running theme throughout the entire series.

There are no holds barred when the viewing public is first introduced to Harkness. He caresses a fellow airman’s backside at a party before it’s revealed the two are having a relationship. Which, let’s face it, is pretty bold of them considering the law and public opinion of homosexuality in the 1940s.

And in the second of the two-parter, ‘The Doctor Dances’, the character of Nancy stops a black-marketeer from threatening her with the police by telling him she knows he’s ‘messing around’ with the male butcher. Although it takes a couple of more episodes before, following much innuendo, Captain Jack kisses the Doctor in what’s believed to be the series’ first same-sex kiss.

Davies himself took the opportunity to take a sly dig at gay stereotyping in werewolf episode ‘Tooth and Claw’.

When Tennant’s Doctor is asked why he failed to notice anything odd about the servants of a manor house, he replies: “Well, they were bald, athletic, your wife’s away. I just thought you were happy.”

Meanwhile, in ‘The Age of Steel’, a deleted scene from the DVD reveals Noel Clarke’s alternate Earth counterpart, Ricky, is the boyfriend of friend Jake.

Continuing the gay theme, Catherine Tate’s debut in ‘The Runaway Bride’ shows two men dancing together at her wedding reception, while in ‘The Shakespeare Code’ the Bard responds to Tennant’s comment about future flirting with: “Is that a promise Doctor?”

In ‘Gridlock’, the pensionable Cassini sisters are clearly married lesbians, while the Doctor’s sexuality is again called into question in ‘Daleks in Manhattan’ by New Yorker Tallulah who asks if Tennant prefers ‘musical theatre’.

Tennant’s Doctor is again involved in some mild male ‘bromance’, offering another New Yorker, Frank, the chance of a kiss, while John Simm’s Master asks Tennant if he is “asking me out on a date?” after the Doctor reveals they are the last of the Time Lords.

Tate’s character of Donna Noble returns in the fourth series, and after announcing a previous boyfriend ran off with another man, it’s all about the girls.

‘The Doctor’s Daughter’ reveals two of Donna’s friends are a lesbian couple who had a child with IVF, while in ‘Midnight’, the character of Sky Silvestry is on holiday to get over a relationship with another woman. Even the return of Piper’s Rose Tyler in ‘Turn Left’ is greeted by Noble with a heartfelt: “Blonde hair might work on men, but not on me!”

Meanwhile, in the series finale ‘Journey’s End’, Davies and Barrowman’s Captain Jack up the ante big time by hinting at a possible threesome with Tennant’s two identical Doctors.

Davies left Doctor Who at the same time as Tennant in 2009 after the two-parter, ‘End of Time’, but couldn’t resist a final scene involving Barrowman.

In a homage to the Star Wars cantina scene, Captain Jack sits alone at a bar next to Being Human’s Russell Tovey – Midshipman Alonso Frame from ‘Voyage of the Damned’. The Doctor passes Jack a note giving Frame’s name. A quick suggestive chat-up between Harkness and Frame follows before Frame asks Harkness if he can guess what he’s thinking.

Well, yes. I think we get the gist.

Since replacing Davies at the helm for 2010, Moffat has largely reined in the gay references. Indeed, Smith’s 11th Doctor remains asexual while Karen Gillan’s companion, Amy Pond, is the flirt.

However, Gillan has had some viewers and newspapers frothing and complaining over her short skirts. Which is odd, considering she has showed considerably less than Manning did, despite it being almost 40 years later in a time of a much more liberal media.

And there’s the irony.

Put against the usual right wing hysteria about traditional family values, Doctor Who has done much to open the doors to more liberal views about homosexuality at prime time and Davies should be applauded for having the guts to do so.

Too bad that the complaints about Ms Pond shows that tolerance of heterosexual sex appeal still has some way to go.

The Tardis Crash Lands in America for Doctor Who {TV}

The BBC have announced that series six of Doctor Who will kick off with a two-parter set in the US “penned by “Who supremo” Steven Moffat.”

In the special two-parter co-produced with BBC America, key scenes will be filmed in Utah for a story set in the late Sixties in which the Doctor, Amy and Rory find themselves on a secret summons that takes them on an adventure from the desert in Utah right to the Oval Office.

Shooting for the scenes in America will start in mid-November Matt Smith, Karen Gillan and Arthur Darvill will be joined by Alex Kingston who reprises her role as River Song.

“The Doctor has visited every weird and wonderful planet you can imagine, so he was bound get round to America eventually! And of course every Doctor Who fan will be jumping up and down and saying he’s been in America before. But not for real, not on location – and not with a story like this one! Oh, you wait!” – Steven Moffat

The new series follows on from the Doctor Who Christmas Special guest starring Katherine Jenkins and Michael Gambon which is due to broadcast on Christmas Day. Series six will start airing on BBC One in spring 2011 and the second half of the series in autumn 2011.