At Sister Scribes we often talk about how important friendship is within the writing community. Andrea Michael is one of those friends, we have shared publishers and parties, we share an agent and a similar sense of humour. I adored her latest book, a novel about the love involved in friendship, it made a change to reading about romantic love and was insightful and honest. With it out in paperback this month, I’m buying myself a forever copy. I’m so happy to host her on Frost, talking about writing friendship in fiction. Kitty x

When I wrote romantic comedies, it was easy to see the importance of a best friend. You needed someone to talk some sense into your main character, encourage risk, push them towards their destiny. They needed to be a support system, offering an opportunity to rant and rave and cry. That’s what best friends are for.

Without friends, it’s hard to convince your reader to trust your character. Why don’t they have people in their life? Why don’t we get to see more of who they are? Are they a real person? Are they loveable?

But most of the time this best friend never gets to have their own adventure, they always exist in relation to the main character. They are the equal opposite, the voice of reason or rebellion, depending on what the main character needs. They didn’t exist on their own.

And that was where the idea for The Book of Us came from. We so often focus on the romantic relationships that change our lives, but what about the important friends who have made us who we are?

Loll and Cass are two friends who fell out years ago. They became intensely close at university, Loll’s anxiety and shyness made smoother by Cass’ outgoing and wild nature. They evened each other out, knew each other’s traumas, weaknesses and dreams. And they planned to spend their life having adventures together.

But things change and sometimes when you make a close friend at that age, you want to know who you could be without them. Either you’re in the shadow or you’re always the leader, and either can be exhausting. Sometimes you just need a chance to grow apart before you come back to see if you still fit.

Writing friendship could be boring – after all the moments that make our friendships are often gradual, quiet and uneventful. We rarely have a manic pixie dream friend plonk herself in our laps and declare herself our best friend.

But much like with a love story, it’s about how it unfolds, how it falls apart, and why it comes back together. Nostalgia only really works when we bring in all the things our readers relate to – a seemingly carefree younger life. Staying out late, getting in trouble, thinking things were complicated when now you realise they were just so simple.

It’s the complexities and problems that I find the most interesting – the secrets and sore points and things unsaid. And the natural rhythms and waves that can come back into play a decade later. A true friendship, even one that ends (through big fireworks or a slow trudge) has an impact on who we are today. And that’s where the magic is, for your audience and your reader.

We just have to hope readers find friendships as complicated and precious as romances, just as they are in real life. Because sometimes your soul mate is your best mate.

Andrea Michael writes books to explore complicated relationships. Having trained in using writing for therapy, she really believes in the magic of stories to change your life. Failing that, sparkling wine and obnoxious sing-a-longs also do the trick.

Follow her on Twitter: @almichael_