The Etiquette of Online Dating

Posted on September 2, 2013 by Frostie

Online dating has been described before as going into a bar where you know every person
in there wants to meet someone. However, this is no ordinary bar scene where you can rely
on a bit of Dutch courage to strike up a conversation. There are some big differences in this
digital world, and a dating website etiquette should be followed when looking for love
online. However, not all of us know what this is.

In this relatively new social medium, Sean Wood, Communications Director at Cupid Plc,
talks us through the dos and don’ts of dating online. From choosing the right website to
picking a great place for your first date. Sean’s insider knowledge can guide you through the
journey to meeting your perfect partner online.

You have made the decision to join a dating website, how do you go about choosing the
right one? What should you look out for?

Online dating is now more and more popular and as a result of this the number of dating
websites on offer is constantly growing. Before you make any decisions, consider what it is
you want to get from your online dating experience, and what kind of person you are
looking for – this will narrow the choices and make your decision easier. For example, if you
are looking for love following a separation and want to find a mature partner,
MatureDatingUk.com might be the best choice for you. If you work in uniform and work
unsociable hours, you may be looking for someone in the same position, and so a site such
as UniformDating.com would be perfect for you. Most dating websites give users a choice
between a free account and a full subscription. This allows you to browse the singles
database and check out the functions of the site, before making the decision to move to a
full subscription. Wherever possible, try to get a trial run before subscribing to a dating site,
to make sure it is most suited to your needs before you spend money on it.

1) What is the best type of picture to post on your profile?

Choosing the right profile picture is very important. You should use a picture you are happy
with, but which is also a true likeness of you – altering your image in Photoshop may
improve your appearance but this will cause problems when your date doesn’t recognise
you and walks straight past you on your first date! On the other hand, it’s perfectly fine to
post what you consider as your best photos, and so posting your passport photo may be
taking it too far! Try to choose a picture that stands out from the crowd, one that catches
the eye of other members and leaves them wanting to find out more about you. Be sure to
choose a photo that looks natural and real whilst still engaging. You can usually change your
profile picture whenever you like, so feel free to play around with your snap until you find
one that gets the most interest from other users. One final note is to avoid including images
of beautiful sunsets and landscapes which you like. Although the views might be stunning,
users want to know about you first and foremost.

2) How do I start writing my profile? What are the main points to include about myself?

Your profile is designed to tell other members all about you, this includes basic personal
information such as your first name and age, as well as details about your interests and
hobbies, likes and dislikes, personality and traits. If you are suffering from writer’s block,
maybe bullet point all of the important information that you wish to share, briefly give an
overview of what you are like and leave the reader wanting to know more about you.
Always be honest in your profile, relationships that start from dishonesty rarely work,
furthermore, you want to find someone who likes you just the way you are! You can include
in your profile a summary of what it is you are looking to achieve from your online dating
experience, i.e. are you looking for friendship, love/romance, marriage etc? Stating this in
your profile will help you to find someone who is looking for the same things you are.

3) What safety features should I look out for when I am joining a dating website?

Before deciding to sign up to a dating site one thing you should pay attention to is the safety
features of the site itself. In order to date safely you will need to sign up to a dating site that
speaks openly about how to stay safe when chatting over the internet, and offers guidelines
on details which you should and shouldn’t share. Furthermore, you should use a dating site
that has invested time and money into developing safety features designed to better
protect you, the user. At Cupid.com we have developed a new safety feature called Safe
Mode. This function allows men to change their profiles so that they can only be contacted
by members who have been verified and who are looking for love – the verification process
is simple – it can be done over the phone and takes only a minute or two. The Safe Mode
function is unique from other safety functions of other dating sites as it acts as a shield,
blocking members from people who haven’t verified their identity and aren’t actually
interested in dating. To add to this, our site moderator continually posts messages in the
public areas of the site, explaining to users the importance of staying safe online and things
that you can do to keep yourself safe.

4) I have the perfect profile set up, now what do I do?!

Now your perfect profile is completed you’re ready to start meeting people! There are a
number of ways in which you can do this. Cupid.com has placed a great deal of emphasis on
developing functions and tools that enable effective communication between members and
we encourage you to utilise these as much as possible. The most common way people start
to meet other members is by searching through the database of single people and
messaging anyone that catches their eye… when you send messages to other members try
to make the messages personal to each individual member, avoid generic sounding
messages as these are much less likely to get a response. A more immediate way to start
conversation is through our free online chat rooms, in which you can start talking to other
members who are online immediately. When you have started to get to know another
member and decide you’d like to get to know them on a more personal level, you can start a
private chat with them.

Before you start chatting with someone, have a look at their profile and see whether they
would actually be a good match for you, for example, are they looking for the same things
as you are? Do they live in your area? Do they have similar interests to you? When you
start initializing a conversation with another member, ask questions about them and listen
to their response, ensure the conversation is two way and you are both engaging in it.

5) How long do you recommend talking to someone online before organising to meet
them in person?

How long you should speak to someone for before meeting them really depends on you, the
person you are talking to and how comfortable you feel with them. At Cupid.com, safety is
essential, so we would suggest waiting until you actually know a person before you meet
them. The usual process would be to start chatting online for a while, and then move to
other forms of communication, such as speaking over the phone. If you are ever unsure as
to whether you should meet someone we would recommend you don’t, never allow
yourself to feel pressurised into meeting someone before you’re ready, and you should
always be sure that it is something you want to do before agreeing to meet anyone.

6) When organising when and where to meet, what should I keep in mind?

When you do finally make the decision to meet up with another member, choose to meet
up in a public place, somewhere that has an atmosphere you can both enjoy, that will allow
you to chat freely and get to know each other even better. When you initially plan your first
date, it is a good idea to plan something short, so if you or your date knows there and then
that it isn’t going to work, you can walk away with no bad feelings. If the short first date
goes well, you can always extend your plans by going for a meal or something afterwards, or
arrange a second date for in a few days.

7) Do you have any do’s and don’ts for conversation on the first date?

The whole point of the first date is to get to know the person you have met up with, so the
best advice we can give you is to appear interested in your date, ask questions and follow
these up with further (related) questions, to show you have maintained an interest in what
they have to say. Answer questions about yourself as honestly as you possibly can, and
answer the question that was asked of you, avoid going off on a tangent or over sharing
information too soon. Be yourself as much as possible, if you are fake in any way it will likely
get noticed and may even put your date off you.

What’s your opinion on online dating? Have you found someone online?

Unknown pleasures

Posted on September 1, 2013 by Richard Mylles

Croatia didn’t have the best of it in the 20th century. Occupied by pretty much everyone with a standing army and a superiority complex (Austro-Hungary, then Germany and Italy, a bit more by Hungary and finally by Yugoslav communists) its post-communism civil war only ended in 1995. Since then it’s managed rather better, becoming the world’s 18th most popular tourist destination, the 28th member of the European union, and (if my acquaintance is anything to go by), the number one destination for unstoppable lads looking to get tanked up and forget they work in finance.

But more important than all that: it is now the country the brains behind Field Day and Hideout have chosen to bless with the inaugural extravaganza of sun, sea and pumping dance music that will be new festival Unknown.

The biggest luminaries of the genre will be there, from disclosure, to Julio Bashmore, to SBTRKT, to the horrors, to my own personal favourites Clean Bandit.

The picturesque town of Rovinj, an unsuspecting coastal jewel of less than 15,000 people is set to be overrun by European party types from the 10th to the 14th of September.

Now, festival previews invariably tend to refer to those pitching up as “revellers”, something which I for some reason find rather irritating. So… attendees will have the choice of either camping out under the stars, in what is expected to be 25 degree weather or they may, like me, stay in an air conditioned apartment complete with bathroom, kitchen, terrace and beautiful people.

The music will be split across 4 stages: the main; the pool; the forest; and mad ferret’s mirror world (think lasers, vortexes and illuminated trees). Given the line-up these should all be pretty spectacular, but what I’m really looking forward to are the 18 or so boat parties. these will feature some of the world’s biggest djs playing intimate sets to 200 lucky… people present in blazing sunshine on the Adriatic Sea. Gonna be a shit time. Most of these are sold out now, but if you’re willing to try your luck there are usually a few struggling souls (for whom the idea of 3 hours on water has become about as appealing as a gooseberry and acid smoothie) who are looking to sell their tickets.

If all the sea, sun and sand gets a bit much, the forest stage, open from 4pm till 6am, promises an ethereal, sun-filtering backdrop to some delightfully deep house. Think Cyril Hahn, Jamie xx and Henrik Schwarz.

Incidentally, if you fancy getting a bit closer to nature (that is, stripping to your wristwatch and going for a hazardous walk in the woods) then you might be interested to know that there’s nowhere better than Croatia – it is world famous for its naturist resorts and about apparently about 15% of the country’s 10 million visitors pack little more than sun cream and a suspicious looking raincoat (n.b. unknown is not a naturist festival).

Otherwise, we recommend short shorts, blinding neon vests and patent leather jazz shoes. Or flip flops.

We hope to see you there. If you see someone wearing patent leather jazz shoes it will probably be me. Come say hi.

You can buy tickets for unknown at http://www.unknowncroatia.com/#tickets17

Sir David Frost Dies Aged 74

Posted on September 1, 2013 by Frostie

Legendary journalist and broadcaster Sir David Frost has died aged 74 after giving a speech aboard the Queen Elizabeth cruise ship. Sir David was famous for his political interviews, including the time he challenged US President Richard Nixon about Watergate. The episode was later made into a film, Frost/Nixon.

Sir David was born in 1939 in Kent and went too study English at Cambridge University. He was also a member of the legendary Footlights, where Hugh Grant and Hugh Laurie also got their start. He has done many TV shows including The Week That Was and his own The Frost Report. He also became big in America thanks to Frost on America and The David Frost Show.

Prime Minister David Cameron tweeted: “My heart goes out to David Frost’s family. He could be – and certainly was with me – both a friend and a fearsome interviewer.”

Sir David married Lady Carina Fitzalan-Howard in 1983, she is the second daughter of the Duke of Norfolk. They had three sons.

Our thoughts go out to his friends and family. May he rest in peace.

Time To Give Up Sugar? Mentor Me Off Sugar Day 27

Posted on September 1, 2013 by Catherine Balavage

Yesterday my fiancée went to play poker with his friends. Usually this is an excuse for me to eat something he would not approve of. Instead, this is what I had:

Lunch was a giant fried egg that was supposed to be an omelette (This was my second attempt and the first one obviously made me too cocky), mushrooms, tomatoes, cucumber and iceberg lettuce with olive oil. Dinner was a tricolore: avocado, tomato, mozzarella with boiled egg, cucumber, lettuce and more olive oil. I am not sure what has happened to the old me but if you see her, dust her off and give her a light slap because she will be in shock.

No fizzy juice, no fruit juice, no chocolate and no sweets or cakes. My only vice the occasional tea with a little bit of sugar when the headaches and nausea gets too bad.

I have always eaten healthily but have the occasional binge and too many sugary drinks. Today is the last day and I have my last call with Laura tonight. My fiancée says he is proud of me and that I look healthy and that I am ‘glowing’. I am glad I did the diet even though it was hard. It has certainly paid off. My last post in the diet will be up soon but I will post some great low/no sugar recipes and facts for you. I hope you feel inspired to cut down your sugar intake. For me, it was definitely worth it.

This Is Where I Am by Karen Campbell | Book Review

Posted on August 31, 2013 by Catherine Balavage

I seem to be on a bit of a winning streak when it comes to reviewing books. The last three have all been fantastic pieces of literature. This Is Where I Am is a stunning book. Definitely in my Top 10 of all time now. This story about a Somalian refugee and his daughter fleeing war and immigrating to Glasgow, and their mentor who helps them integrate into society is a book of life, reality, grief, death and hope. This makes it sound like a sad book, in many ways it is, but, like life itself, it is intertwined with happiness and the beauty of life itself, of human connection.

This book by Scottish writer Karen Campbell also made me rather homesick. Although I grew up in the Scottish Borders and have now lived in London for over seven years, it made me miss Glasgow as I lived there for a good few years. The book is also written partly in Glaswegian. You don’t have need a dictionary to read it and I quite like the poetry of it. It adds to the atmosphere of the book. Each Section is a different month and tourist place in Glasgow, with a little bit of historical facts at the beginning. To get you started on some Glaswegian here is a quick guide:

Heid – Head
Flair – Floor
Greet – Cry
Messages – Food shopping
Wee – Little
Juice – Cold drinks, not tea
Canny – can’t
Bahookie – Bottom
Tae – to

The brilliance of the book is that you see Glasgow fresh through the eyes of Abdi, the refugee, and Deborah, the Scottish woman mourning her dead husband who mentors Abdi.

The story is brilliant and the difference between white British Middle Class life and that of refugees in Somalia gives an accurate glimpse of the unfairness of life. How circumstance is all the difference between a good life and a terrible one. On the day I finished reading this book there were stories in the papers of displaced women in Somalia, proving that the travesties of war have long-term consequences.

This book is 467 pages long. It is so good I read it in a few days. This Is Where I Am can take its place as a great Scottish book, but also as a great story about human rights. A must read.

This Is Where I Am

‘The Celebrity Protection Agency’ To Provide A-listers Anonymity Thanks To Morphsuits

Posted on August 31, 2013 by Frostie

Are you a celebrity? Can’t go out to check how many papers you are in because of the paparazzi? Is it all just a bit much? Well here at Frost we think we have found the solution. The innovative people at Morphsuits has an idea. Just buy one of their suits. It could be you, or it could just be a random person who loves skin-tight red morphsuits. THEY WILL NEVER KNOW.

Morphsuits has publicly unveiled its team of vigilantes that provide free suits for A-listers in need of anonymity, dubbed ‘The Celebrity Protection Agency’ (TCPA)

Morphsuits, the all-in-one spandex bodysuit, has enlisted a group of ‘masked vigilantes’ to guard popular A-lister hotspots and hand out free Morphsuits to any celebrity with the desire to remain anonymous when leaving a bar or club.
The team, which remains completely anonymous, has been assisting celebrities for over a year but has now decided to go public with the service due to the latest VMA debacle, commenting: “It’s time these poor people had some anonymity. Why can’t you just let them twerk in peace?”
The service is now available for hire by celebrities via Twitter, they just need to tweet @Morphsuits with #ProtectMeMorphsuits, and the team will arrange the time and place via direct message so not to reveal the star’s destination.

Guilty Pleasures Pop Up at Mary Janes Bar

Posted on August 31, 2013 by Frostie

This autumn will see the arrival of the global phenomenon that is Guilty Pleasures at stylish City bar, Mary Janes. Every Thursday night guests can enjoy a glorious all-singing, all-dancing pop-up spectacle from DJs, dancers and performers bringing a razzle-dazzle tour de force to Londons traditionally conservative financial district.

From the moment they arrive, city workers will leave their consciences at their desks and walk into a sinner’s paradise. Throughout the course of the evening, Guilty Pleasures unique blend of entertainment will be popping up with DJs, singers, cabaret performers, dancers, acrobats and a whole troupe of kitsch characters guaranteed to start a party unlike anything ever seen before in the City.

In the eight years since it was founded, Guilty Pleasures has become a musical institution, embracing the full scope of the pop spectrum, from the 70s to the present day. Founded by the charismatic broadcaster and lifelong music fan, Sean Rowley on his cult BBC London radio show, it has now evolved into a sell-out club night, a compilation album series and a television show. Alongside Sean, Guilty Pleasures eclectic cast create an unforgettable heart stopping, disco dancing, pop spectacular!

To celebrate the arrival of Guilty Pleasures, Mary Janes have created a bespoke food and cocktail menu with a Guilty Pleasures theme which will truly be the answer to guests prayers. Guests can enjoy Naughty Hot Dogs, a platter of mini hot dogs with different toppings such as Chilli con Carne, American Mustard, Fried Onions and Melted Cheese, or can go to the dark side with Dirty Burgers; a selection of burger sliders with fillings including Pulled Pork, Chorizo, Chilli and Cheese. Diners will be singing the praises of the sinfully sweet Dunkin Donuts, a homemade selection of sugared Cinnamon Donuts with Chocolate Sauce, Toffee Sauce and Warm Apricot Marmalade.

Drinkers will be confessing their sins after delving into the Guilty Pleasures themed cocktails which include the Chocolate Mint Pleasure, a playful blend of Vanilla Stolichnaya Vodka, Cacao White, Crème de Menthe, Milk and Chocolate Sprinkles. Pop princesses can opt for the Sassy Spritz, a zingy mix of Aperol, Prosecco, and Soda. The Retro Mai Tai will transport guests back to the last days of disco and will combine Santa Teresa Rum, Triple Sec, Captain Morgan, Pineapple, Orange Juice and Grenadine

Owned and operated by The Mint Group, Mary Janes is a chic bar with an interior combining a touch of the baroque with modern elegance. Plush Louis XVI style chairs, crystal chandeliers and red drapes lend a sense of theatre to the venue, whilst downstairs exposed brickwork, leather banquettes and a long wooden and zinc-topped bar create a more contemporary space. The bar has several intimate spaces perfect for group bookings, as well as the ever-popular karaoke room which can take bookings for up to 12 people.

Mary Janes
124-127 Minories
London
EC3 1NT
Tel: 020 7481 8195
W: www.maryjanesbar.com/
Twitter: www.twitter.com/maryjanesbar/
Facebook: www.facebook.com/pages/Mary-Janes-Bar/

Opening Hours
Monday-Wednesday 12pm – 11pm
Thursday & Friday 12pm – 1am
Available for private hire on weekends

Time To Give Up Sugar? Mentor Me Off Sugar Days 24, 25 and 26

Posted on August 30, 2013 by Catherine Balavage

The last weekend of my no sugar diet is coming up. At midnight on Sunday I will be at the end of a 28 day Mentor Me Off Sugar Programme ran by the excellent Laura Thomas of Happy Sugar Habits. I never thought I would get this far and I flirted with the idea of quitting after my mother got very ill. But here I am; almost at the end.

The main thing I can say it that it has been educational. I knew I was having too much sugar but I did not think it was easily avoidable. But it can be. I am sleeping much deeper and better now. The weight just dropped off and my energy is higher, more constant.

Laura has told me off for not eating enough vegetables so last night I had homemade fish and chips with peas and roasted carrots. The day before we had peppers stuffed with tuna and mozzarella. Yesterday at Sainsbury’s I bought mushrooms, cucumber, iceberg lettuce, parsnips, carrots. I also got tomatoes, avocado and olives. Pretty healthy and we already had some peppers in the fridge.

I have also been having a lot of hummus and wholemeal pitta bread. As well as generous helpings of good, wholemeal bread and lurpack butter. Sometimes simple is best.

I love food and trying new things so to be honest the food part of the diet has been much easier than I imagined, the drinks, however, were hard as I thought. The temperature has gone over 30c this summer and the urge for a cold, fizzy drink was hard to resist. But I did, and I am very proud. Finding out that homemade Gin & Tonic had no sugar was a high point. Endless cups of herbal tea and water really were not.

Before I started this programme one of my biggest fears was getting diabetes, to my shame not just because of the health problems, but also because I would not be able to eat and drink what I wanted. This programme has changed my life and stopped future health problems. My no sugar diet may stop this Sunday, but my low sugar life will just be beginning.

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